MEN JOKES -- Why Men Can Pee Standing Up

azilana7037
By azilana7037

God was just about done creating humans, but he had two parts left over.

He couldn't decide how to split them between Adam and Eve so He thought He might just as well ask them.

He told them one of the things He had left was a thing that would allow the owner to pee while standing up.

"It's a very handy thing," God told them,"and I was wondering if either one of you had a preference for it."

Well, Adam jumped up and down and begged, "Oh please give that to me! I'd love to be able to do that! It seems like just the sort of thing a mand should have. Please! Pleeease! Give it to me!" On and on he went like an excited little boy.

Eve just smiled and told God that if Adam really wanted it so badly, he could have it. So God gave Adam the thing that allowed him to pee standing up.

Adam was so excited he just started whizzing all over the place - first on the side of a rock, then he wrote his name in the sand, and then he tried to see if he could hit a stump ten feed away - laughing with delight all the while.

God and Eve watched him with amusement and then God said to Eve, "Well, I guess you're kind of stuck with the last thing I have left."

"What's it called?" asked Eve.

"Brains," said God.

By somwerNdmiddle• 25 Aug 2010 13:51
somwerNdmiddle

if you're hungry and hypoglycemic don't read the FUNNIES Section :D

By azilana7037• 25 Aug 2010 13:46
azilana7037

He sent me the same comments he posted above...

Some people do need to chill out.

THIS IS POSTED IN THE FUNNIES...see the title: MEN JOKES...so it's a joke...hayyyyzzzz

By azilana7037• 25 Aug 2010 09:01
azilana7037

Anyways.. pissing standing up or sitting down doesn't matter.

Some guys here need to chill...this is just a joke...in the FUNNIES section...hello?

By alfa Q• 25 Aug 2010 08:24
alfa Q

Gal: Three & three six & three nine

I know the length of yours but you don't know the depth of mine

Guy: Three & three six & three nine

I can piss in yours but you can't in mine.

By deadchest2• 25 Aug 2010 06:04
deadchest2

how unlucky man are..so persistent of having a thing, thought he doesn't even know yet what would god gave him..

what if Eve, asked and begged God to have it..hmmmm

By hassan97• 25 Aug 2010 05:27
Rating: 4/5
hassan97

how dear u say like this i am gonna kill u .n dnt u ever say such bullshit abt such nobbel person i swear of ALLAH if u were here next 2 me i would cut u in thousands pieces n give it 2 ma dogs thy would love 2 eat u ...... n offer forgiveness to ALLAH IN THE MONTH OF RAMADAN and 1 more thing u will go to hell ....n would u ever think hw u will face thm n ALLAH on the day of judgement n think before u say n may ALLAH never forgive u

By tahami• 25 Aug 2010 05:24
tahami

i think u dont know muslims yet...that when they get mad what can they do...just wait and watch

By tahami• 25 Aug 2010 05:18
tahami

wtf r u thinking u r writing dont u have any sense u as* ho*e...offensive

By anonymous• 22 Aug 2010 23:01
anonymous

do women pee by sitting ????

By anonymous• 22 Aug 2010 22:57
anonymous

Sorry about that rOcKzZz

By anonymous• 22 Aug 2010 22:51
anonymous

i pee by sitting lol....

By anonymous• 22 Aug 2010 22:21
anonymous

lol rishi.. I was just about to use fluid mechanics :-P

By anonymous• 22 Aug 2010 21:51
anonymous

that's nice to know azi..:) was just defending the guys..

By alfa Q• 22 Aug 2010 21:49
Rating: 4/5
alfa Q

Sign near urinals...

Aim properly..

You are holding a pistol or is it pisstol

and not a rifle

By azilana7037• 22 Aug 2010 21:29
azilana7037

my degree needs a lot of calculations and normal values and all that stuff...

And now, I do bookkeeping, accounting, payroll and I'm doing admin work. Guess I'm Jane (not Jack) of all trades, master of none :P

By anonymous• 22 Aug 2010 20:52
anonymous

Burp......next

By anonymous• 22 Aug 2010 20:24
anonymous

azi, i believe, fluid mechanics is certainly not one of your favourite subjects...so dont go into it..

By shutterbug• 22 Aug 2010 20:23
shutterbug

BLAHAHAHAHAHAHA, so fannnny (Funny)..

By azilana7037• 22 Aug 2010 20:18
azilana7037

why there are still splatters on the seat?

Too much velocity or the too much distance from point A to point B.

the distance to travel to the destination will be higher if the source is short??? whehehehehe

See...not only mathematical equation...but logic as well ;P

By bubblymom• 22 Aug 2010 19:57
bubblymom

a brain woman can control...

a brain man can never control! LOL

By Nishadan• 22 Aug 2010 19:52
Nishadan

you are amazing....

By gudone• 22 Aug 2010 19:46
gudone

aha...so..thts the story!!

By crnkshft• 22 Aug 2010 19:10
Rating: 4/5
crnkshft

Hey it's good for more than just peeing...

Please stop it with the being offended folks... Really are some of you over here to be professionally offended? Does your job title require you to walk on egg shells, or observe others doing it... Let's not be ridiculous

I eat all day long during Ramadan and I eat pork. Now there you can get offended about my personal choice to do that!

By shapil• 22 Aug 2010 18:38
shapil

yes wk...if not for that I would have had no brains ;)

By Dracula• 22 Aug 2010 18:36
Dracula

Genesis 2-2 1/2 And on the seventh day God made a BLONDE! :0)

By anonymous• 22 Aug 2010 18:34
anonymous

shapil good you remember now ;o)

By shapil• 22 Aug 2010 18:33
shapil

that thing has gotta brain of its own.

By britexpat• 22 Aug 2010 18:30
britexpat

He gave them a brain AND the ability of multiple Orgasms :O(

By Angelo Rocks• 22 Aug 2010 18:28
Angelo Rocks

100 % true xena

By Angelo Rocks• 22 Aug 2010 18:24
Angelo Rocks

so silly............do we have to laugh now

By Xena• 22 Aug 2010 18:21
Xena

you are starting to become offensive...I have no idea why you stay on QL if you find everything that anyone posts so offensive...

By flanostu• 22 Aug 2010 18:07
flanostu

offensive???? people that can't take a joke are offensive.

By anonymous• 22 Aug 2010 18:01
anonymous

lol offensive to whom???

By the way Azi peeing standing up is not an easy task. it takes a lot of brains and you need to apply Physics to it. Study the projectile motion, initial velocity, momentum, distance to be covered, wind velocity and the direction to calculate the force required.. It takes a lot of brains :P

By drmana• 22 Aug 2010 18:00
drmana

hehehehehe.....target practising :-)

By anonymous• 22 Aug 2010 17:55
anonymous

azi, the women took the better looking white matter and left the dirty looking gray matter for the man..

and the rest is history..:)

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