chit-chatting. And I am not externalising and don't know what you want me to own up to.

There are specific people who are guilty of this behaviour here and when they hijack topics for chit-chatting they are breaking the forum rules. It may not be pc to single them out and refer to their nationality in order to identify them, but imo they need to be made aware of the fact that their behaviour is irritating and against the forum rules.