It's ok Samir. Some people when they are in a denial mode just try to pass it on as a joke. There are a times in everyone's life when feelings of loneliness, being unwanted, unacknowledged, unfulfilled desires are there. That is the time one feels that the whole world is alien and nothing works out.

Involved in thoughts and everyone wishes for that one more chance to the dance to the tunes of life again.

Samir it is all perceptions and maturity of a particular human. Some withdraw inwards into introspection others seek diversion with morbid thoughts and desperate actions. Many deny it altogether for the fear of it being considered as a weakness/

This too shall pass my friend. Just keep the faith and be strong.