then his life has definitely changed in the past few months. I spoke to him on the phone about a year ago, to arrange to play squash. He'd just returned from vacation in the UK and was desperately upset, over the phone, about missing his family back home.

Now he has a girlfriend he wants to elope to Singapore with?

johnjo - if she doesn't want to join you (all expenses paid) then I'm not sure she feels as strongly about you as you do about her! IMHO

Have you offered to take her kids with you both to Singapore too?