Start your day with a smile # 2
A young Arab guy moves to Montreal and goes to a big department store looking for a job.
The manager asks, "Do you have any sales experience?"
The kid, "Yeah, I was a salesman back home".
"Well", the manager liked the young man, so he gave him the job. "You start tomorrow. I'll come down after we close and see how you did, but let me give you a bit of advice. If a customer comes looking, say, for Toothpaste, you might suggest for him a toothbrush, or shaving cream etc. you get the idea?"
"Of course," the young man said. His first day on the job was rough but he got through it.
After the store was locked up, the manager came down. "How many sales did you make today?"
The kid says, "One" The manager groans, "Just one? Our sales people average 20 or 30 sales a day. How much was the sale for?" The kid says, " $101237.64."
The manager exclaims, "What? $ 101,237.64? What did you sell him?"
The kid, "First I sold him a small fish hook. Then I sold him a medium fishhook. Then I sold him a larger fishhook. Then I sold him a new fishing rod. Then I asked him where he was going fishing, and he said down at the coast, so I told him he was going to need a boat, so we went down to the boat department, and I sold him that twin engine Chris Craft. Then he said he didn't think his Honda Civic would pull it, so I took him down to the automotive department and sold him that 4X4 Pajero.
The manager says, "You mean a guy came in here to buy a fish hook and you sold him a boat and truck?!"
The kid, "No, no, no, he came in here to buy a box of Always Ultra for his wife and I said, "Well, since your weekend's already f**ked up, you might as well go fishing".
A bus stops and 2 Italian men get on. They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. The lady sitting next to them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of them say the following:
Emma come first.
Den I come.
Den two asses come together.
I come once-a-more.
Two asses, they come together again.
I come again and pee twice.
Then I come one lasta time."
"You foul-mouthed sex-obsessed swine," retorted the lady indignantly. "In this country...we don't speak aloud in public places about our sex lives"
"Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Who talkin' abouta sex? I'm a just a tellin' my frienda how to spell "Mississippi'.."
I'VE GOT $5.00 THAT SAYS YOU'RE GONNA READ THIS AGAIN
that is a very old joke
Good story :)