Too much taking can wreck marriage!

britexpat
By britexpat

Last month a new study found that, far from keeping a marriage together, talking too much about feelings and problems can drive a wedge between a couple.


Would you agree with this ? Is it better not to discuss everything ?


Dailymail

By anonymous• 12 Sep 2011 17:55
Rating: 3/5
anonymous

Talking about feelings and problems, imagine someone confessing that his next door neighbour's wife is all he wishes to be with and that he can't get off if he doesn't think of her...now, do you think this will do any good to the relation?

By flor1212• 12 Sep 2011 12:02
flor1212

but not to be silent at all 

By qatar_01• 12 Sep 2011 12:00
qatar_01

80% success comes from communication. To keep a healthy married life u have to keep a healthy communication level. On the other hand excess of everything is bad.... and we all know that :) 

By Milky_BarKid• 12 Sep 2011 11:50
Milky_BarKid

best is to be a selective listener and respond to important and things of concerns!

By sleepyhollow• 12 Sep 2011 11:08
sleepyhollow

i agree on this....  i always believe that some things are better left unsaid..

By seasons• 12 Sep 2011 10:05
Rating: 4/5
seasons

Agree its true 

By Speedysid• 12 Sep 2011 10:03
Rating: 5/5
Speedysid

Yes, and I agree to that.. But I was merely adding to what you had to say, about couples must ideally do when facing hard times.

I firmly believe that the best way to remove all uncertainties in any sort of a relationship-be it friendship, partnership, family, any thing- is to communicate well with each other. Bring things to the table, no matter how awkward they may seem initially. And of course, no body will say 100% of the things which is on their mind, but at least its a start..

By anonymous• 12 Sep 2011 09:40
Rating: 4/5
anonymous

Speedysid - Support during bad times is important but some couples focus more on problems and how upset they are rather than try to solve things. I know a lot of couples who are fighting over something rather than sit,talk and think about solutions. It's ok to discuss problems but couples shouldnt forget to enjoy by having quality time together.

By Speedysid• 12 Sep 2011 09:34
Rating: 4/5
Speedysid

Agreed, abt couples sharing good time together.. To add a bit, it is also essential that couples support each other in bad times. It may be an illness, financial constraints, working hours, or whatever,- a couple must find ways to make things work and happen..This, I believe, sets a foundation for an open, trsutworthy relationship... A Hug during a bad time would be more worthy a bouquet of roses during a good time...

By anonymous• 12 Sep 2011 09:20
Rating: 4/5
anonymous

Agree on this..It's not necessary to discuss everything. It's ok to discuss problems but i believe that we should focus more on the positive things. Sharing Good times together more than arguing is what couples should be..

By cherukkan• 12 Sep 2011 08:48
Rating: 4/5
cherukkan

It might not be good for all but I know few who speaks a lot (voice chat) on a daily basis. It depends on both sides if both of them are interested to talk a lot or not.

By Speedysid• 12 Sep 2011 08:45
Rating: 5/5
Speedysid

Well, the general consensus seems, that while communicating with your partner is a good thing, too much of it isn't..

But then ,how does one define 'too much' communication... because, as partners, a couple would definately want to know as much as possible. It doesn't seem fair if a partner wouldn't know what the other is doing whereas the same is known to a 3rd person, right?

 

By anonymous• 12 Sep 2011 08:43
anonymous

I don't think it's healthy to discuss every little thing that irritates you at any given moment, that would just sound like nagging, but sharing and talking about your feelings and issues is important to a marriage. 

By anonymous• 12 Sep 2011 08:42
Rating: 2/5
anonymous

different strokes for different folks on this one...depends on the individual's personality & the kind of relationship the couple shares with each other...

By ingeniero• 12 Sep 2011 08:41
ingeniero

Brit, but i saw people who discuss everything on daily basis.. talking every time with their spouse, still they have good relation.

By ingeniero• 12 Sep 2011 08:38
ingeniero

Lincoln, but i want your full attention towards me :) sanity, 3 months passed dear :)

By TwoStone• 12 Sep 2011 08:36
Rating: 5/5
TwoStone

Agreed with FS on this "If you dont share your feelings... you will feel frustrated..."

By anonymous• 12 Sep 2011 08:35
anonymous

If he/she is not good in bed, it will also wreck the relation!

By anonymous• 12 Sep 2011 08:35
anonymous

Will tell after two three years. 

By ssbnss• 12 Sep 2011 08:34
Rating: 4/5
ssbnss

I agree with you, no need to discuss each and everything

By anonymous• 12 Sep 2011 08:34
anonymous

I am listening. But while I am listening I am thinking about something else. Maybe that's why, ingeniero?

By ingeniero• 12 Sep 2011 08:34
ingeniero

Lincoln, i know you can listen me, if even i talk too much :)

By Formatted Soul• 12 Sep 2011 08:33
Rating: 4/5
Formatted Soul

If you dont share your feelings... you will feel frustrated...why not share it with partners? if he/she is not a good listener...maybe it can wreck the marriage..they will have to find someneelse to share feelings and more..:)

By ingeniero• 12 Sep 2011 08:33
ingeniero

Lincoln, we men can handle and can listen each others for long hours.. but problem is other dept. :)

By FathimaH• 12 Sep 2011 08:31
FathimaH

And again..Agreed! Your spouse is not your psychologist and whilst its essential to discuss burning issues one should know where to draw the line. I for one never wanted the whole "confession booth" or "soul baring" type marriage. Of course this is  my opinion and I know some couples who do have such marriages and it has worked for them,Alhamdullilah. Its just not my cuppa!

By britexpat• 12 Sep 2011 08:29
britexpat

ROFL ! Thanks for pointing that out.. Gives a different meaning to the post :O)

By jayca• 12 Sep 2011 08:28
Rating: 5/5
jayca

Communication is one of the keys to a healthy relationship., but  too much of everything  is not healthy anymore., so i agree ;)

By Formatted Soul• 12 Sep 2011 08:25
Rating: 5/5
Formatted Soul

Brit your title is misleading... lol taking?

I dont agree.... I want to listen ...but I dont like to talk..:)

 

By anonymous• 12 Sep 2011 08:22
anonymous

You already talked too much, ingeniero!

By britexpat• 12 Sep 2011 08:22
Rating: 4/5
britexpat

I would agree with you - but are we a minority :O(

By ingeniero• 12 Sep 2011 08:21
Rating: 5/5
ingeniero

Agree, its better not to discuss each and everything for a long term and happy relations.. Good Morning Brit and Lincoln...

By anonymous• 12 Sep 2011 08:19
Rating: 4/5
anonymous

Agreed!

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