Magical Penis Theft!!! Saudi Soon?

adey
By adey

http://uk.news.yahoo.com/rtrs/20080422/tod-uk-congo-democratic-witchcraft-cb1d00a.html

Lynchings in Congo as penis theft panic hits capital

Reuters


By Joe Bavier

KINSHASA (Reuters) - Police in Congo have arrested 13 suspected
sorcerers accused of using black magic to steal or shrink men's penises
after a wave of panic and attempted lynchings triggered by the alleged
witchcraft.

Reports of so-called penis snatching are not uncommon in West
Africa, where belief in traditional religions and witchcraft remains
widespread, and where ritual killings to obtain blood or body parts
still occur.

Rumours of penis theft began circulating last week in Kinshasa,
Democratic Republic of Congo's sprawling capital of some 8 million
inhabitants. They quickly dominated radio call-in shows, with listeners
advised to beware of fellow passengers in communal taxis wearing gold
rings.

Purported victims, 14 of whom were also detained by police, claimed
that sorcerers simply touched them to make their genitals shrink or
disappear, in what some residents said was an attempt to extort cash
with the promise of a cure.

"You just have to be accused of that, and people come after you.
We've had a number of attempted lynchings. ... You see them covered in
marks after being beaten," Kinshasa's police chief, Jean-Dieudonne
Oleko, told Reuters on Tuesday.

Police arrested the accused sorcerers and their victims in an
effort to avoid the sort of bloodshed seen in Ghana a decade ago, when
12 suspected penis snatchers were beaten to death by angry mobs. The 27
men have since been released.

"I'm tempted to say it's one huge joke," Oleko said.

"But when you try to tell the victims that their penises are still
there, they tell you that it's become tiny or that they've become
impotent. To that I tell them, 'How do you know if you haven't gone
home and tried it'," he said.

Some Kinshasa residents accuse a separatist sect from nearby
Bas-Congo province of being behind the witchcraft in revenge for a
recent government crackdown on its members.

"It's real. Just yesterday here, there was a man who was a victim.
We saw. What was left was tiny," said 29-year-old Alain Kalala, who
sells phone credits near a Kinshasa police station.

By BettyBes• 15 Sep 2010 02:03
Rating: 2/5
BettyBes

To this time, are there still sorcerers living in this day and age?penis enlargement

By r7• 28 Apr 2008 13:08
Rating: 4/5
r7

I dont have a skyline the GT is for Mustang :)

By r7• 28 Apr 2008 12:48
Rating: 5/5
r7

Salax ur really honest dude :)

By thexonic• 28 Apr 2008 12:44
Rating: 2/5
thexonic

I'll pretend i didnt read this :O

IF EVERYONE WAS TO TAKE AN EYE FOR AN EYE, THE WHOLE WORLD WOULD'VE BEEN BLIND TODAY - MAHATMA GHANDI

By anonymous• 28 Apr 2008 12:09
anonymous

Alexa...If I move to KSA, it would be to the Eastern Province (Damman/Khobar-area).  Onwards and upwards, sister.  I'm blowing this popsicle stand!  I put in ENOUGH time in Riyadh so I'd rather not put dw though that again.  I wonder how foreign women survive there. 

 

Alexa...where did you hang out in KSA?

 

(OP, sorry for the partial-hijack but Saudi was mentioned in the original post's title!)

By anonymous• 27 Apr 2008 15:32
Rating: 2/5
anonymous

Adey, I'm moving to Saudi in August so I'll keep QL updated on the latest from KSA (unless QL is banned there).

 

Like Eco, I'm better with flowers and giving people practical advice (maps, housemaid agencies, phone numbers) than hangin' out (given the above topic, this may be a bad choice of words).

 

I have the answer to penis theft & penis damage........chasity belts!

 

This should keep the penii safe from witchcraft and theft.

By paul• 27 Apr 2008 06:48
paul

 

So strange 

By someonenew• 26 Apr 2008 20:12
someonenew

Alexa just ignore the guy! In every thread there'll be a guy with principles!!!

By someonenew• 26 Apr 2008 19:45
someonenew

Are the QL "members" fighting again?????? LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!

By DaRuDe• 26 Apr 2008 12:34
DaRuDe

its you who got the negative thoughts.

if i can ignore or avoid such threads then whats your problem

Yea sure am Da Rude wil dunce dumb heads.

Grow up have some sense and be wise.

and yea i dont have any one EITHER in my buddy list or QLSG with DIRTY MIND LIKE YOURS. 

 

[img_assist|nid=73057|title=.|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]

By anonymous• 26 Apr 2008 12:31
anonymous

this is just a reminder, if any one out there in QL who is not dirty in mind then I have no problem meeting them........will you spread the word Da rude

 

Adey sorry to hijack your interesting, well worded topic 

By DaRuDe• 26 Apr 2008 11:48
DaRuDe

 

you sould too brave and bold behind the screen

wonder how cowrd and chicken you will be in meeting them face to face., 

 

[img_assist|nid=73057|title=.|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]

By adey• 26 Apr 2008 11:44
Rating: 4/5
adey

 just on my way out

Nothing worse than have your member cracked down on!!! But then again some people pay good money for that sort of thing!

 

"Deaths in the Bible. God - 2,270,365

not including the victims of Noah's flood, Sodom and Gomorrah, or the

many plagues, famines, fiery serpents, etc because no specific numbers

were given. Satan - 10."

By QT• 26 Apr 2008 11:43
QT

I understood.  Bit slow in replying though!  Just got up!  LOL 

By jauntie• 26 Apr 2008 11:36
Rating: 4/5
jauntie

that the use of the word 'member' (when referring to a penis) isn't an international term.

 

Don't know WHY I bother sometimes! sigh

By QT• 26 Apr 2008 11:26
QT

Lighten up!  If you can't be open and have a joke with friends and family, who should you talk and joke with?

By adey• 26 Apr 2008 11:18
Rating: 4/5
adey

 you are entitled to your opinion. Tell me though, does Saudi still convict and kill people it believes to participate in witchcraft?

 

"Deaths in the Bible. God - 2,270,365

not including the victims of Noah's flood, Sodom and Gomorrah, or the

many plagues, famines, fiery serpents, etc because no specific numbers

were given. Satan - 10."

By anonymous• 26 Apr 2008 11:07
anonymous

I wouldnt have clicked this pornified version, And PM I thought QT is ur adopted son I feel like throwing out my breakfast......so sickening to discuss this with your children

By jauntie• 26 Apr 2008 10:53
Rating: 4/5
jauntie

I can't help wondering if the penultimate paragraph in this news item included an intended pun?

 

"Some Kinshasa residents accuse a separatist sect from nearby

Bas-Congo province of being behind the witchcraft in revenge for a recent government crackdown on its members."

 

tee hee

By dragonfly212• 26 Apr 2008 10:41
Rating: 5/5
dragonfly212

JBH, you naughty man.. wink wink

Everybody is right Everybody is wrong, it depend where we stand.

By JBH• 26 Apr 2008 10:09
JBH

Maybe thats what happend to mine also.

 

It may not be the biggest, but it can fill a pram!

 

Call me Maninibat!

By anonymous• 25 Apr 2008 23:50
anonymous

That's what happened to mine.  That's why it's so small now.  The sorcerers shrank mine!  Now, I take a smaller pant size.

By dragonfly212• 25 Apr 2008 23:25
Rating: 5/5
dragonfly212

what the benefit of the wichcraft get from all collection??? LOL

Everybody is right Everybody is wrong, it depend where we stand.

By adey• 25 Apr 2008 21:50
Rating: 4/5
adey

PENII REDUNDANT

Some hope for our unfortunate Congolese friend

 

"A Tunisian family is suing a 30 year old man for "raping their 20 year old daughter through phone sex".

It seems that while they were having phone sex, the girl kinda

punctured her hymen. The argument is that the two of them had sexual

relations, even through the phone, that led to the girl's loss of hymen."

So whether stolen, miniaturized or simply dried there are other ways to to get the ladies hot.

"Deaths in the Bible. God - 2,270,365

not including the victims of Noah's flood, Sodom and Gomorrah, or the

many plagues, famines, fiery serpents, etc because no specific numbers

were given. Satan - 10."

By someonenew• 25 Apr 2008 21:11
Rating: 2/5
someonenew

Oh ok. Thanks didn't know that. But this the first time I'm hearing about Penii witchcraft

By anonymous• 25 Apr 2008 21:05
Rating: 5/5
anonymous

 Please not the penises.

Hold on Ladies

 

 Don't curse those useful innocent penises.

 Make sure to delivered that curse to those confused, colorful and flamboyant  fine gents.

Specially to those that don't  like their male sexuality and  penises at all.

 I'll bet you they will be happy to donate their penises to the skillet and fry pan of witchcraft.....

HINDI KA TIGASIN.

By adey• 25 Apr 2008 20:56
Rating: 4/5
adey

If you keep up with news from Saudi one man has already been

executed for witchcraft this year and a woman is under sentence of

death for trying to make her neighbour impotent via witchcraft!!

I thought it might give some saudi authorties some ideas for their next bizzaro wheeze.

 

 

"Deaths in the Bible. God - 2,270,365

not including the victims of Noah's flood, Sodom and Gomorrah, or the

many plagues, famines, fiery serpents, etc because no specific numbers

were given. Satan - 10."

By jassKat• 25 Apr 2008 20:51
jassKat

 

 

I will never hear that song without being reminded of this again!!!

 

tra la la

By someonenew• 25 Apr 2008 20:51
someonenew

Oh by the way, what does Saudi have to do with the missing penii???

By someonenew• 25 Apr 2008 20:45
someonenew

GOod one adey....LOL

By someonenew• 25 Apr 2008 20:43
someonenew

and they sewed it up and it works fine!!!

By jassKat• 25 Apr 2008 20:41
jassKat

 

LOOOOOLLLLL Adey

I think that just made my entire week :P

 

 

tra la la

By jassKat• 25 Apr 2008 20:41
jassKat

 

 

Could you imagine being the officer that found it?  When he got home that day and his wife asked him what he did at work?

"Oh nothing much honey, just searched for a cut off penis on the side of route 84...But I found it, so no worries!"

 

 

tra la la

By adey• 25 Apr 2008 20:39
Rating: 4/5
adey

 Couldn't resist

 

 All together now!

A One, a Two, A one two three four.... 

There is a house in New Orleans

They call the Dried Penii

And it's been the ruin of many a poor boy

And God I know I'm one

 

"Deaths in the Bible. God - 2,270,365

not including the victims of Noah's flood, Sodom and Gomorrah, or the

many plagues, famines, fiery serpents, etc because no specific numbers

were given. Satan - 10."

By jassKat• 25 Apr 2008 20:33
jassKat

LOL PM,

Guess he was a lucky one :D

 

 

tra la la

By someonenew• 25 Apr 2008 20:30
someonenew

yikes!!!

By jassKat• 25 Apr 2008 20:23
jassKat

 

Someonenew, you know how some people hang flowers up in the house to dry them and use them for decoration??

 

Well... switch the flowers with the penii, and there is the answer to your question :D

 

 

tra la la

By someonenew• 25 Apr 2008 20:21
someonenew

Jass...Oh ok...in that case i guess we're back to my previous question.

By someonenew• 25 Apr 2008 20:20
someonenew

Adey...thanks for the sarcasm, appretiate it.

 

By jassKat• 25 Apr 2008 20:16
jassKat

 

Someonenew, 

Once the penis is removed, it's useless! Pretty much just shrivels and dies... sorry for the description, but it's true!

Actually had a patient in the hospital I work at thats penis was cut off in a car accident... enough said. It couldn't be reattached, but they do have prosthetics!

 

 

tra la la

By adey• 25 Apr 2008 20:13
Rating: 3/5
adey

"I think its a whole load of bull"

Oh sweetheart, bless

don't tell anyone! but they have removed the word 'gullible' from the dictionary!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Deaths in the Bible. God - 2,270,365

not including the victims of Noah's flood, Sodom and Gomorrah, or the

many plagues, famines, fiery serpents, etc because no specific numbers

were given. Satan - 10."

By someonenew• 25 Apr 2008 20:12
someonenew

seriously guys is it an organ that u can use for other people like for instance i've heard of people stealing kidneys and and other organs that can be transplanted. Is a penis one such organ???

By jassKat• 25 Apr 2008 20:09
jassKat

 

I am watching The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, and even he was making fun of this story!

 

 

 

tra la la

By someonenew• 25 Apr 2008 20:06
someonenew

or maybe sell it to the men itself who have small ones like a growth serum or somethin like that lol .....gosh u guys are so funny

By someonenew• 25 Apr 2008 20:04
someonenew

ROFL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

By jassKat• 25 Apr 2008 20:03
jassKat

 

someonenew, maybe room decor??

 

guess it take the term penis envy to a whole new level :D

 

 

tra la la

By someonenew• 25 Apr 2008 20:01
someonenew

yeah besides what do u do with a bunch of stolen penii(sounds better)

By jassKat• 25 Apr 2008 20:00
jassKat

 

someonenew, it does paint an interesting picture though. Some guy steeling into the mans bedroom while he is sleeping and just swiping the penis :D

 

 

tra la la

By someonenew• 25 Apr 2008 19:58
someonenew

how can u just steal them, its not something u can just detach and attach again!!! I think its a whole load of bull

By jassKat• 25 Apr 2008 19:56
jassKat

  oh silly me, of course the sorcerers!

I wonder if some guy just made this up as an excuse for why his penis was so small.  

 

I can't get over that last line: "there was a man who was a victim.

We saw. What was left was tiny..."

tra la la

By adey• 25 Apr 2008 19:55
Rating: 4/5
adey

 Stone cold mate, stone cold

 

 you won't be laughing once you've had your todger nabbed! ( or 'arf inched would be more appropriate in this case )

 

"Deaths in the Bible. God - 2,270,365

not including the victims of Noah's flood, Sodom and Gomorrah, or the

many plagues, famines, fiery serpents, etc because no specific numbers

were given. Satan - 10."

By jassKat• 25 Apr 2008 19:52
jassKat

 

What I want to know is, did these guys wake up one morning and their penises were just missing???  And of course the next logical train of thought would be, who stole it???

 

 

tra la la

By jassKat• 25 Apr 2008 19:50
Rating: 4/5
jassKat

I dont even know what to say... There are a thousand comments swimming in my head right now, but I can't even grasp one on this!

Oh an PM, the plural of penis is penises, although I like the sound of penii much better :D

 

 

tra la la

By anonymous• 25 Apr 2008 19:48
anonymous

Or have you been drinking Adey ??

 

 

 

[img_assist|nid=98726|title=.|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]

By QT• 25 Apr 2008 19:39
QT

I don't know whether to laugh or cry!   How ridiculous!

By adey• 25 Apr 2008 19:36
Rating: 4/5
adey

 

 

Oh but do try,  I'm sure you can see it from a truly original angle and comment?

 

 

"Deaths in the Bible. God - 2,270,365

not including the victims of Noah's flood, Sodom and Gomorrah, or the

many plagues, famines, fiery serpents, etc because no specific numbers

were given. Satan - 10."

By adey• 25 Apr 2008 19:14
Rating: 4/5
adey

 Offers better oppotunities for humour Moi? Base? Never!

 

"Deaths in the Bible. God - 2,270,365

not including the victims of Noah's flood, Sodom and Gomorrah, or the

many plagues, famines, fiery serpents, etc because no specific numbers

were given. Satan - 10."

By adey• 25 Apr 2008 19:08
Rating: 5/5
adey

 If you keep up with news from there one man has already been executed for witchcraft this year and a woman is under sentence of death for trying to make her neighbour impotent via witchcraft!!

I thought it might give some saudi authorties some ideas for their next bizzaro wheeze.

 

 

"Deaths in the Bible. God - 2,270,365

not including the victims of Noah's flood, Sodom and Gomorrah, or the

many plagues, famines, fiery serpents, etc because no specific numbers

were given. Satan - 10."

By qaswa• 25 Apr 2008 18:56
qaswa

artical doesnt mention anything about saudi?

By dreamandsmile• 25 Apr 2008 18:24
Rating: 2/5
dreamandsmile

interesting and entertaining news, thanks 

 

"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment. "

Ralph Waldo Emerson

By panda• 25 Apr 2008 18:22
panda

i heard these thieves are coming soon to doha......maybe they could help someone ;p

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