A Letter to the Culture that raised me
A letter to the culture that raised me: (by Yasmin Mogahed)
I’m a soul, a mind, a servant o God. My
Worth is defined by the beauty of my soul, my
Heart, my moral character. So, I wont
Worship your beauty standards, and I don’t
Submit to your fashion sense.
Growing up, you read me the Ugly Duckling. And for years I believed that was for me. For so long you taught I was nothing than a bad copy of the standard.
I couldn’t run as fast or lift as much. I didn’t make the same money and I cried too often. I grew up in a mans world that I didn’t belong.
And when I couldn’t be him, I wanted only to please him. I put on your make up and wore your short skirts. I gave my life, my body, my dignity, for the cause of being pretty. I knew that no matter what I did, I was worthy only to the degree that I could please and be beautiful for my master. And so I spent my Iife on the cover of Cosmo and my body for you to sell.
I was a slave, but you taught me I was free. I was your object, but you swore it was success. You taught me that my purpose in life was to be on display, to attract and to be beautiful for men. You had believed that my body was created to market your cars. And you raised me to think that I was an ugly duckling.
But you lied.
Islam tells me I’m a swan. I’m different-its meant to be that way. And my body, my soul was created for something more.
God says in the Qur’an: O’ mankind, we created you from a single (pair) of a male and a female and made you into nations and tribes, that you may know one another (not that you may despise one another). Verily, the most honored of you in the sight of God is the one who is most righteous” [Qur’an 49:13]
So I am honoured. But it is not by my relationship to men. My value as a woman is not measured by the size of my waist or the number of men who like me. My worth as a human being is measured in a higher scale: a scale of righteousness and piety. And my purpose in life- despite what the fashion magazine say-is something more sublime than just looking for good men.
And so God tells me to cover myself, to hide my beauty and to tell the world that I'm not here to please men with my body. I’m here to please God. God elevates the dignity of a woman’s body by commanding that it be respected and covered, shown only to the deserving-only to the man I will marry.
So to those who wish to “liberate” me, I have only one thing to say: Thanks but no thanks.
I’m not here to be on display. And my body is not for public consumption. I will not be reduced to an object, or a pair of legs to sell shoes. I’m a soul, a mind, a servant o God. My worth is defined by the beauty of my soul, my heart, and my moral character. So, I wont worship your beauty standards, and I don’t submit to your fashion sense. My submission is to something higher.
With my veil, I put myself on display- rather than my beauty. My value as a human is defined by my relationship with God, not by my looks. So I cover the irrelevant. And when you look at me, you don’t see a body. You view me only for what I am: a servant of my Creator.
So you see, as a Muslim woman, I've been liberated from a silent kind of bondage. I don’t answer to the slaves of God on earth. I answer to their King.
rainbow_serpent, it's not about winning or losing. It's about taking the time to consider what other people say and write and reflect on that. Over time you will gain a little wisdom if you do this.
I do wish you all the very best on your personal journey and hope that you will consider what others say too :)
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Love is the answer...
well I dont live acording to ur book...
I might lost this argument but it doesnt affect me, it just maeks me strive more to learn about ISLAM, and that being a slave of ALLAH (swt) I am prone to commiting mistakes.
I have found this to be a very intellectual arguement. Very healthy indeed.
after all, what we do or say does not define us, what defines us is what we do after we fall...
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[[[[[[Be MorE Concerned AbouT YouR CharacteR ThaN YouR Reputation BecausE YouR CharacteR Is WhO YoU ArE AnD YoUr ReputaTioN Is WhaT OtherS ThinK Of YoU!!!]]]]]]
Subhan Allaah!:(
Well the more I get to know Muslimah's (Especially Arab Muslimah's), I realize they are incredibly empowered and they are just waiting for their culture to catch up with them (and pity the ruler that doesn't catch up fast enough LOL Ahem Saudi Arabia!). Most of them have a better sense of what constitutes feminism then many Western women. They've found the wonderful happy medium of being modest, yet attractive (they don't have to be mutually exclusive) of being intelligent working women (who are cut throat) and mothers and wives. Much as many Western women are also starting to learn.
However it's the ones who just bow down and wear niqab and such that bother me, as much as the Western girls who get boob jobs and wear halter tops. They are both forms of slavery to men.
"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco
What I meant was that your writings suggested that your opinion was right and that anyone who has a different opinion is wrong.
And that, in my book, is called 'losing the plot'.
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Love is the answer...
I lost what??? is there a competition here? i dont think so.
the topic is way too long now.
i have stressed over and over that ALL THIS BOILS DOWN TO ONE THING!!!
and that is RESPECT...
I even said sorry if someone was offended by what Ive said...
and again, my sincerest apologies to those people who were offended by what I said, YES its a wrong statement but it doesnt have to be long like this... all ervyone is have said - i think i have covered abt 85% of it....
All of us are unique creations, th world is full of troubles, do we have add up to that??? Being unique means each of us has their own thought, point of views, cultures, way of thinking, way of life...
BUT AGAIN for the hundreth time... RESPECT IS THE KEY...
I think finger pointing can never help...
WALLAHI, IM VERY SORRY IF I OFFENDED ANYONE, I might have been carried away by what Im writing which resulted on a wrong statement.
salaam to all
[[[[[[Be MorE Concerned AbouT YouR CharacteR ThaN YouR Reputation BecausE YouR CharacteR Is WhO YoU ArE AnD YoUr ReputaTioN Is WhaT OtherS ThinK Of YoU!!!]]]]]]
Amen to that. Freedom to choose is what liberates the heart, mind and soul.
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Love is the answer...
I don't pity someone for being a Muslima, but I do pity women who confuse Feminism and subservience.
"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco
Arona, please don't pity me for being a Muslima. I totally rock :)______________________________________________________
Love is the answer...
LOL. DG You're a star.
"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco
OK, rainbow_serpent, you lost it with saying you are not a Muslim woman if you don't cover up.
Did I miss something today when somebody made you Allah?
Why, why, why are people still debating on whether to cover your hair or not? Wear an abaya or not. If you want to/feel you should, do. If you don't want to, don't. Each one of us is answerable to either society, no-one, their family, their spouse, Allah, etc, but you are answerable to YOURSELF.
If I decided to ice-skate at the City Centre in a polka dot bikini and flourescent pink hair then I would. Yes, my husband would raise an eyebrow. However if he decided to do the same in a pair of skimpy Speedos it'd be much worse than that... you'd have to take me away on a stretcher and give me the antidote to unstoppable laughter.
rainbow_serpent, mabrouk for mecoming a Muslima. You are at the beginning of a lifelong journey of learning. Please respect the fact that others have different opinions based on their experiences which are to be considered and respected.
It's not like me to enter a religious debate. I usually have way too much respect for people :) _______________________________________________________
Love is the answer...
What the hell is /\ supposed to be?
"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco
i love PM's issue below," to be able to live with others with different views, beliefs religions in harmony, "
And I find being a Muslim lady is really different with us.I have a little pity on them.
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share your life with me as we are different:)
Don't be so insulted PM, rainbow brite here is a better Muslimah then you and a better woman then all of us because she covers her face and hair and speaks quietly and doesn't talk to men, and doesn't work, etc etc. We should really all learn our place like good smart her.
"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco
PM, the trouble is in any text you read you can extract from it many ideas and views. So many interprtetations are possible from any book, whether the Quran, Bible what ever.For some what is fact is for others fiction, this is of course not bad but the fact that people are unwilling to talk about their different interpretations and views, this is the problem.
Of course when one has a faith, it is a strong belief and it is difficult to accept others opinions on your belief.
The world will never agree on everything, thats not the point of it, the point is to be able to live with others with different views, beliefs religions in harmony, which as we all know is the most difficult task facing our Human Race today.Maybe one day you and Rainbow will sit down and discuss your different views, at the end you may both still have your view but you will understand the other better.
May Allah be with you
Rainbow, your beleive and strength in it is to be praised and admired but you are at the begining of your journey in the collection of knowledge and wisdom. To learn one must have open ears, to listen, to understand this does not mean you have to accept but you must be able to hear what otjhers say. Do not go the way of confrontation, go the way of tolerance and understanding, ask questions, seek answers for what is different to what you beleive, be a searcher of knowledge and truth.
You are of course bewildered why PM has a different way to look at Islam than you but before you harshly critise firstly find out why PM is different and what her thoughts are, by doing this you will be richer in knowledge.
Our life is a permenant learning process, to learn you must first listen and ask, do not accept all you hear but at least hear it first.
PM please be patient, show your true wisdom, try to make Rainbow see you view rather than just your anger.
PM, dear being a MUSLIM cannot be measured by age.. as uve said ur twice my age, so why not cover urself??? i think ur a born muslim..havent u read whats on the QURAN... how can u be a MUSLIM if you are chopping the words of ALLAH (swt)??? seems like u r just following what u can and leave the rest.. a womans modesty in the HOLY QURAN is a covered woman.
isnt ISLAM about striving to please ALLAH (swt)??? so how can u please HIM if ur chopping HIS words?
yes i am new in ISLAM, but unlike the born-MUSLIM fellows, we strive so much to learn, and YES we WILL commit mistakes and it'll take us a long long time to fully understand ISLAM, but then again each one of us will be rewarded on the last day...
and please u dont have to use your hard hand on me as i am not onw of ur students..
kindly look at urself first before u look @ others...
IM SORRY. I DIDNT MEAN TO OFFEND ANYONE
salam alaikum!
[[[[[[Be MorE Concerned AbouT YouR CharacteR ThaN YouR Reputation BecausE YouR CharacteR Is WhO YoU ArE AnD YoUr ReputaTioN Is WhaT OtherS ThinK Of YoU!!!]]]]]]
PM, I realise that all children need sometimes a firm hand but you know as I do you must look at who is saying what and why. I really beleive she was excited and happy that she had found her light in life, she was just over zealous and as the young tend to be, forgot others in her extacy.
As we all know following any religion is not about what you wear its about what you beleive in your heart and soul and what you do with your beleive.
She just stated what she has heard or understood from someone, show her the true way of Islam, its tolerance, its beauty, its love of all living things, its dignity its grace.
I am not a Muslim but I respect those who are and follow the teachings of such a religion, as I do anybodfy that has a faith.
PM, when you are young and have found a new meaning in life, its guidence and the gentle hand of understanding and wisdom that you need......not the hard hand.
Show Rainbow you graciousness and understanding and most of all your wisdom as befits an older beleiver. You are a teacher and must lead by example
Salaam Alaikum
thanks black prince
[[[[[[Be MorE Concerned AbouT YouR CharacteR ThaN YouR Reputation BecausE YouR CharacteR Is WhO YoU ArE AnD YoUr ReputaTioN Is WhaT OtherS ThinK Of YoU!!!]]]]]]
Rainbow, live happy and healthy and enjoy your new found energy and peace in your world. If it is what you need to be at peace with yourself and rest of us then thats is great. Remember we live together on the planet and you are welcome on it even though you see life differently. Your thoughts don't make you a bad person only your actions against others do.
well its been a long discussion...
as whats was said above, some believe and some dont...
but RESPECT must be there whatever race or religion
i posted this becasue i find it beautifully written, to be shared and not to argue abt..
some dont accept it or partly accepts the half and leave the half behind...
and please dont get confused with ISLAM & the ARABIC CULTURE, they way too different... worlds apart...
ISLAM IS A WAY OF LIFE and NOT JUST A RELIGION.
every questions has an answer and they are all in the HOLY QURAN
niqab is not compulsary... but covering up ur body and hair is a must. YOU will not be a MUSLIM WOMAN if you dont cover yourself up.
then again, it all boils down to RESPECT...
i find this beautifully written and al hamdulilah that some like it and some dont...
we all have different perceptions or view in life, lets just slow down and try to live our lives in harmoniously.
[[[[[[Be MorE Concerned AbouT YouR CharacteR ThaN YouR Reputation BecausE YouR CharacteR Is WhO YoU ArE AnD YoUr ReputaTioN Is WhaT OtherS ThinK Of YoU!!!]]]]]]
rainbow serpent, its nice for you that you have "found Religion" but not everybody beleives in it like you do.
To keep the Beauty of your heart and soul I would advice you not to put your morals on others, as that is intolerance and detracts from your worth as you descibe it.
While writing you last phrase "So you see, as a Muslim woman, I've been liberated from a silent kind of bondage." is not bad, you went from one bondage to another......now thats progress!!!
It always depends on your reason for wearing them.
"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco
I think mini skirts and cover girls are fine. THat is feminine empowerment. I would be a cover guy in a second for $10,000 dollars a day or whatever they are paid and the adulation of half the female population.
Hi Gypsy, firstly, I am always amazed at how well informed your arguements are, so for me, you do research the subject and bring in good points. Secondly, I dont approve of what she said, give me a free thinking, intelligent women who can discuss things with and who is willing to listen to someones elses point of view.....even a mans
Why does everyone assume that because I disagree I haven't researched the subject?? Does anything I say on this forum come across as I don't research things before making an opinion?
"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco
Have you noticed that only men approve of what she says?? Hmmm.
"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco
im an arab american that is going back home after 20yrs to Amman.
I love what y said ,i respect the fact that y know yr self i have been searching for that for a long time. i love women in abayya it makes me curious to see how good looking they are if the are Nude y seen every thing then its not exciting any more. seen a lot in my life?
with all do respect,and correct me if im wrong, When God said ' ya abdi'
and he the mighty didnt say " ya abeede" he ment my worshippers,because there is a big dif. he the mighty send the prophit Mohammad to free the slaves ,why would he wants us to be his slaves???
Now if y have fitish and y want to be someone slave,more power to you, enjoy it, any lady could slave me in Bed,next morning things will be diferant, i might serve her breakfast in bed or i might say thank you and do not see her again.More power to you no matter where y are,faith is good it warmes the heart it it make one feel.......... y determine that
Well I'm not going around ripping the ninja outfit off their faces. At the same time I won't stay silent while they try and pass it off as some great feminist movement. There are women who have actually done stuff for women's rights and then there are the women who parade around with fake boobs or wear niqab.
"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco
Agreed Alexa, but don't try and pass it off as feminism.
"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco
What the Hell? Ok so you can't run as fast or life as much, but you most certainly are as smart and ambitious as any man. Just cause you can't win a race doesn't mean you can't run a multinational company! What a pile of horse patootie. Women like you are a shame to women. Through off the ninga outfit and go fight for what you want for both you and your daughters. Throwing on the niqab is as much giving up and accepting a subserviant position to men as is putting on a mini skirt and being a cover girl. Twit.
"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco
well it seems i got so much reaction. this goes out to all those muslim-born people wo doesnt give importance to ISLAM. Im a convert. And i was questioned so many times on why I have converted... I was even told "shame on me for not finding Jesus Christ and not believing" I was on private catholic schools from prep to college... i didnt say i found him. On my younger days in school, we were asked to recite the rosary/ave maria/novenas etc... one by one informt of the class. and i still believe in Jesus...
Its just that I found more peace in covering up myself and being a slave of ALLAH (swt)and not the worldy things as mentioned above.
But then again its a matter of respect for each and everyone regardless of religion and race.
and Muslim women are not opressed. We just choose to be beside our husbands. I still do a lot of things by myself, still interact with men, times have changed.
Healthy mind and body can be achieved even if we are wearing abaya/niqab/hijab...
I still have so much FUN even if Im wearing abaya/hijab.
I am the same person, im just more fulfilled now, in a sense that I am having no worries becasue I let Allah (swt) in control of my life...
Al Hamdulilah for ISLAM.
Al Hamdulilah because I AM A MUSLIM...
[[[[[[Be MorE Concerned AbouT YouR CharacteR ThaN YouR Reputation BecausE YouR CharacteR Is WhO YoU ArE AnD YoUr ReputaTioN Is WhaT OtherS ThinK Of YoU!!!]]]]]]
YAY for babies...:)
Alexa ... have you met Angelwing in real life? I think she do more thing in a week than what i do in a year lol ...
All said I don't see how you people meet one another...
Let alone get a relationship going.
Looks to me like things have to be arranged or introduced...
Anyway...
Cover up all you want...
Doesn't bother me at all...
:)
to add to this...
character is doing what is right even when no one is looking...
amen to alexa...i agree 100%..I do things because I want to..not because someone else might think it is good for me to do...
i really like this... its very well written. when i break down, i read this only...
[[[[[[Be MorE Concerned AbouT YouR CharacteR ThaN YouR Reputation BecausE YouR CharacteR Is WhO YoU ArE AnD YoUr ReputaTioN Is WhaT OtherS ThinK Of YoU!!!]]]]]]
awesome Masha Allah
some of us think differently tho..
Masha ALLAH nice.