Dating While Pregnant

Gypsy
By Gypsy

No, I'm not pregnant, I just found this article and it fits in with some other things I've been saying, so enjoy:

Um, dating while pregnant…?
By Louise Sloan
You’re out on a first date with a promising new guy. You try not to bring up anything too controversial. Then he says, “Just to get this out of the way, do you want to have kids?” Um, actually, yes, you do—so much so, in fact, that you’re going in to your gynecologist’s office tomorrow morning to be inseminated with anonymous-donor sperm.

Welcome to the newest dating frontier—dating while inseminating. The women out there doing it have made a careful, considered decision to try for motherhood before their biological clock rings. For them, it’s just not an option to grab the nearest man in a desperate bid for kids (“I call them sperm-donor weddings,” says one single mom) or to get pregnant “accidentally” by a man they don’t love. These women go the sperm-bank route. But they’re still hoping to meet the man of their dreams, so they keep their profile up and their fingers crossed. Could you be among their ranks right now—or perhaps in another few years? Here’s some advice from the women who’ve done it.

When do I tell a date what I’m doing?
Many women keep their “trying to get pregnant” status quiet until the relationship gets serious. Bad plan, says psychotherapist and single mom Jane Mattes, author of the classic guidebook Single Mothers by Choice. “It’s a trust issue,” she says. “You can’t hold back something big and expect them to trust you later on.” Martie, 42, who’s been trying to conceive for the past six months, agrees. “I usually find a way to tell the man what I’m doing within the first date or two,” she says. “I don’t want to leave them in the dark, and I want to see ‘what they’re made of’ before a real attachment is formed. That way, it’s easier to break off, if necessary.”

How to share the news
A spoonful of sugar (in the form of an upbeat attitude) is the best way to get a positive response. Your self-confidence offers your date a cue as to how to react. Says Annie, the new single mom of a nine-month-old boy: “I was straightforward with no hint of shame or apology or discomfort. I also tended to use humor. One first-date disclosure came up in the context of acupuncture (which I was doing for fertility reasons). I had been telling him a goofy story about acupuncture, and he asked why I was doing it. I said something like, ‘Well, I’m trying to get pregnant (flirty smile)... not with someone I meet over drinks, with a donor... and acupuncture may enhance fertility.” He chuckled and started asking curious questions. The other time I brought it up, I started with something like, ‘I’d like you to know something about me in case it’s a problem for you…’”

Other women in this situation say they set it up with something along the lines of: “There’s one big thing going on in my life I should tell you about. I’ve always wanted kids, and the clock is ticking, so I’ve actually started trying to get pregnant with a sperm donor. I’m so excited about it! But it’s the kind of thing I feel like need to be upfront about with anyone I start to date.” Then, to give your date the opportunity to talk about the topic in a less personal way, you can segue into a current-events conversation by adding, “It’s starting to be a bit of a trend these days. Do you know anyone who is thinking about starting a family in this way?” That also helps steer the conversation away from a too-intimate discussion of your relationship history or the ins and outs of insemination... that is, of course, until you’re ready to share all that.

What kinds of reactions to expect
What will your date’s reaction be? “How many different guys are out there?” asks Annie, rhetorically. “One guy just thought it was cool and cheered me on. The other was curious. Neither turned out to be long-term relationship material, but my trying to conceive wasn’t the deal-breaker.” Other men hit the road immediately, however. That’s what happened to Lisa, now the mom of a toddler. “They will say, ‘Um, that’s very interesting… I don’t know how I feel about that... [silence]... That’s great you’re doing it if you want that,’” she says. “Then you never hear from them again.”

Martie finds that her dates’ reactions depend on their parental status. “The men who already have children are very interested and respectful of what I’m doing, even offering to go on doctor visits,” she says. “The men who don’t have children and want them seem to be very hurt at first. I think many of them have the same dream that we do and have a hard time letting go of it, too.” It can bring difficult feelings to the fore when they see a woman going after what they want in the future, without a guy in her life. The key thing is to remember that a guy’s reaction is about his goals, needs and attitudes—not about you! Don’t let any rejections get under your skin.

The sex question
Having sex with your date while trying to get pregnant at the doctor’s office can feel emotionally alienating, even if it does make logical sense. On the weekend of her third insemination attempt, Michele, 36, used a condom for a Saturday-night date with a boyfriend. First thing Sunday morning, she went to her doctor’s office for an insemination. “It was pretty funny,” she says, regarding this ironic separation of sex and conception. But she’s glad she used that condom instead of risking pregnancy with a guy who might not be husband or father material.

When it comes to intimacy, honesty is key, if you want the relationship to have long-term potential. No man wants to have the double-whammy surprise of being told his new girlfriend is pregnant—and not by him. Your situation has to be broached, and well before you find yourselves in bed.

Is this fair to the guys?
Women aren’t the only ones putting their long-term reproductive goals ahead of whatever possibilities a new relationship might hold, points out Lori, 43, who’s five months pregnant as a single mom. “One of the guys I dated a little while ago had told me how important having kids was to him and I told him I shared the same value. He dumped me without a word when I told him how old I was. I guess he thought I was a lost cause; little did he know I would become pregnant in a few months!”

Ultimately, if a guy’s really the right person for you, he may well stick around, even under these unusual circumstances. Jill was closing in on 40, so she didn’t stop trying to conceive as a single mom when she started dating someone new. The beginning of her anonymous-donor-conceived pregnancy was “a pretty low period for us,” Jill admits—but they worked through it and got married two years later. “He’s an amazing father—very enthusiastic,” she says. So far, happily ever after.

Louise Sloan is author of Knock Yourself Up: No Man? No Problem. A Tell-All Guide to Becoming a Single Mom (www.knockyourselfup.com). She lives in Brooklyn with her son Scott, age 1-1/2.

By Gypsy• 19 Nov 2007 19:38
Gypsy

Actually 9 time out of 10 they are college students looking for a quick buck.

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By anonymous• 19 Nov 2007 10:38
anonymous

Simple as that.

Who are we to judge ?

[img_assist|nid=17018|title= PUSH THE TEMPO !!|desc=|link=none|align=center|width=|height=0]

By Gypsy• 19 Nov 2007 10:35
Gypsy

I try Oryx :).

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By Oryx• 19 Nov 2007 10:31
Oryx

How typically topical u r Gypsy.

A friend of mine plays to go an adopt - just told me... not the same exactly but still a sucessful individual opting for single parent hood.

By anonymous• 19 Nov 2007 10:29
anonymous

Valid point, Let it be

The Red Pope of Qatar Living

By Gypsy• 19 Nov 2007 10:21
Gypsy

Red Pope these women are in their 40's and financially stable, how are they a burden to anyone??

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By anonymous• 19 Nov 2007 03:27
anonymous

Do you know How much money it cost to do a hereditary test and How long it takes?

The Sperm bank issue is just a quick fixer for a solution of reproduction. Do I agree with it NO!

The question that bounces is it morally correct?

Is it legal enough to accommodate Single mothers, not the married ones with fertility issues in a modern society?

Those sperm bank companies don't care If you are single or married, all they care is in cashing out.

All they do is, meet the minimum federal and state laws to stay in business.

In my opinion single mothers, just need to stay like the word says: SINGLE!

If you choose to get pregnant by means of fertility clinics is your choice. Don't make it a burden.

Lots of woman are not wealthy, neither rich.

I have seen way too many burdens for single mothers.

The Red Pope of Qatar Living

Egomania goes with the territory of decoding your own genome.

By Maria.m• 18 Nov 2007 21:53
Maria.m

Gypsy, certain mental/blood genetic disorders can not be screened and best left to the discretion of sperm donor. Owing to the fact that most of these donors may be drug addicts or people who are in need of money the possibility of honest revelation is doubtful. I admire your zeal for giving a child loving environment but there are better ways to do it. I respect you for your contribution to Dherima.

By Gypsy• 18 Nov 2007 15:46
Rating: 5/5
Gypsy

Salax, in the West many men marry women who already have children, whether from a previous marriage or from a previous partner. It's not uncommon at all, and in fact, with the divorce rates as high as they are it's very very common now. I know many men who've married single moms (and a couple of women who have married single dads). It takes a big man to take on the responsibility of another mans child, and most Western men are more then willing to take on that responsibility.

Maria, yes sperm banks test for hereditary diseases. The men actually have to go through a process of health tests before their sperm is allowed to be used.

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By Maria.m• 18 Nov 2007 13:39
Maria.m

May be I am cutting tangent here or completely off the topic but do these sperm banks scrutinize for heredity diseases.

By Gypsy• 18 Nov 2007 12:53
Gypsy

I agree completely with adoption Salax, I recommend people do both. But a single parent usually can't adopt from 3rd world countries and waiting lists in the West are up to 10 years long. However, I think a big thing with this is wanting to experience pregnancy and childbirth as well as having a child. If I never get to experience that I would feel like I had missed out on my purpose in life.

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By Gypsy• 18 Nov 2007 10:29
Gypsy

The entire point of this thread Red Pope is about women choosing to become single mothers, not about accidently becoming a single mom. Although it doesn't delve to deeply into it in this, my guess is these women are quite finacially stable, or else they wouldn't be voluntarily putting themselves in the situation. If I ever choose to do this I would make sure that I am more then capable, finacially as well as emotionally, to care for the child.

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By anonymous• 18 Nov 2007 09:47
Rating: 2/5
anonymous

I wish I earned that kind of money a year.

Raising children is not easy, specially when you are a single mother or father.

The cost duplicates more when you are single parent. I know, we all want the best for our own children, but is everybody choice in selecting the right time. Family planning is possible.

Is just a estimated cost based on a blue collar workers income earning minimum salary.

The Red Pope of Qatar Living

Egomania goes with the territory of decoding your own genome.

By Gypsy• 18 Nov 2007 09:35
Gypsy

So your telling me most people in the United States are earning that much? That may be the estimated cost, but for sure that's not what most people are raising children on.

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By anonymous• 18 Nov 2007 03:04
Rating: 2/5
anonymous

It cost both parents under one roof, around 1.5 million dollars to raise a kid in todays economy in the USA ,until the age of 18.

The Red Pope of Qatar Living

Egomania goes with the territory of decoding your own genome.

By Gypsy• 16 Nov 2007 10:30
Gypsy

Nope. Your point?

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By anonymous• 16 Nov 2007 10:27
anonymous

cool

Do you how much money it takes to raise a child in the USA today in dollars until age 18?

The Red Pope of Qatar Living

Egomania goes with the territory of decoding your own genome.

By Gypsy• 16 Nov 2007 10:21
Gypsy

Nope, not yet.

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By anonymous• 16 Nov 2007 10:19
anonymous

Do you have children of your own?

The Red Pope of Qatar Living

Egomania goes with the territory of decoding your own genome.

By Gypsy• 16 Nov 2007 10:16
Gypsy

Thanks Charmed. :)

I've kinda been biting my tongue ( I know me! biting my tongue GASP HORROR!) on my overall opinion of people who argue that the traditional nuclear family is the ONLY way. Personally, and I don't mean to offend anyone, but I think that anyone who argues that simply has no clue what is happening to children out there in the real world. They haven't experienced, or witnessed the horrific abuse that is inflicted on children by their parents. They haven't seen what happens to a child when they are forced to move from foster home to foster home, or grow up in a half way home or orphanage with no parents at all. They don't see how disensitised, disillusioned and generally dysfunctional these children become without ANYONE to love them.

A traditional HEALTHY nuclear family is great, and if this was a perfect world I would not see why anyone would want to do anything else. However this is NOT a perfect world, not by a long shot, there's no chance it will be anytime soon. So if a loving, commited gay couple or a single mom want to give a child love and a home, then go for it. We need more loved children in this world.

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By charmed• 15 Nov 2007 17:31
charmed

thread - its a shame there is so much rubbish on here!

what does religon have to do with women dating whilst trying to get pregnant?

and please dont tell me that someone is under the stupid impression that infertile women are infertile for a reason - if you are please do tell me so and i would like to meet you in a dark alley way that makes me sick, not everyone is lucky enought to be able to have children in this world.

Gypsy this is so cool that you are thinking of this! its amazing! women so should have the choice to be able to have babies if they can and if they wish to! Its amazing!

Should women tell men what they are doing when on dates! of course if the man cant handel it, its his problem and hes not worth the time or the effort!

and there is nothing wrong with kids being born and only having one parent! i mean whats a better situation a child being born with one parent in a safe and secure enviroment - or being born to two parents where the parents constantly bicker and fight, or abuse each other!

So yeah this post rocks!

[img_assist|nid=13270|title=Love Life|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=180|height=113]

By anonymous• 15 Nov 2007 15:07
anonymous

For Gypsy

Hey girl is your Biological clock ticking?

Jauntie

At least in a Circus I will laugh, but in this forum is just Vindication of desires of one person in posting her options.

Another Dante novel with a sperm twist..

The Red Pope of Qatar Living

Egomania goes with the territory of decoding your own genome.

By jauntie• 15 Nov 2007 14:34
jauntie

I haven't read all the way through this, I got to about 2/3rds of the way and saw this comment of yours, which more or less sums up how I feel (although you were, in fact, being sarcastic):

"...if God intended for infertile people to have kids he wouldn't have made them infertile no? Doesn't that apply to the whole medical field? Lets just scrap medicine and let god's plans unfold for all of us!"

I BELIEVE in nature taking it's course.

I don't have children but then again I wasn't desperate to have any so I didn't get into the realms of artificial insemination.

I probably have other things I could say, but not in the mood to join this circus at the moment.

By the black prince• 15 Nov 2007 13:55
the black prince

Mrs, thanks for that info on the Quran and what it says, as I suspected it does of course not discuss Sperm dners, how could it, its a new thing.

So that means that what the Quran says in relation to others aspects such as Marriage, adultery is then applied to Sperm donors/Banks but surely that is then an interpretation of what is written. The point for example from Gypsy, how can sperm donors be seen as adultry, this is the sexual act and it its form this does not take place whan going to a Sperm Bank.

What you are doing is putting your interpretation of the Qaran on the subject of Sperm Donors, its OK to use the technology for a childless married couple but not for others, its OK for me that you do that its your right to see what you want to see in the Qaran.

The problem for all faiths is, to try and come to terms with new aspects of life, which their faiths writings could not have foressen and therefore have not covered in their writtings. Mankind moves on, for better or worse, Faiths and religion do not, they stay in the boundaries that have been given to them., Whether like the Dinosaurs, religion will die out because of its inability, not to change, more that it is unable see or to accept the changes that are taking place. As much as we would like Evolution and new technology cannot be stopped, it can be steered but to do that you must first see where its going and why.

All that you say is not in Qatar is, why?, because Qatar has human beings living in it, with all the good and bad points and not all those from foreign countries are the bad and not all of the Arabs are the good.

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 15 Nov 2007 13:47
skdkak closed 1708224867

I completely agree with you and also I can be wrong too.

The joke was meant to discribe the situation and for some members who do not even acknowledge or have the logic to accept the problem of AIDS / HIV / children out of wedlock etc etc prevalent in this country.

I am not jack of all trades...... The joke was for consumption of Mrs.

..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..

By diamond• 15 Nov 2007 13:46
diamond

Actually Mrs. you said 'show me'. You have now been informed that there are hundreds of children attending local schools here whose parents are not married. They have been abandoned.

Don't move the goalposts from what you originally requested.

_______________________________________________________

Love is the answer...

By anonymous• 15 Nov 2007 13:44
anonymous

As far as I understand they can't be adopted by foreigners either (herway).

By Gypsy• 15 Nov 2007 13:44
Gypsy

But who cares??? The kids are in school, they have a parent who loves them, they are happy and healthy?

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By Mrs.• 15 Nov 2007 13:40
Mrs.

Once again I am asking you:

pick any school here, see the number of kids who don't know one of their parents, or whose parents are not married, and compare them to any school in any 'developed' country (Netherland for example). The rates will speak for themselves!

"Be strong but not arrogant

Be modest but not weak"

S.H

By anonymous• 15 Nov 2007 13:39
anonymous

People coming in on a tourist/visit/business could/must not but do have aids until they finally get checked a lot can happen.

Please don't forget the people who go out for vacation and come back they don't get check again either, however this topic is far away from the sperm bank.

By diamond• 15 Nov 2007 13:35
diamond

I can verify what Gypsy has said about orphanages. It's a sad reality of the society here. These lovely, angelic children are actually not orphans. They are unwanted, abandoned.

Orphans of local children are brought up by the extended family.

It makes me sad to know this happens here. I am ashamed of these adults behaviour in abandoning their own.

___________________________________________

Love is the answer...

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 15 Nov 2007 13:25
skdkak closed 1708224867

There was a Pigeon who couldn't fly.

He saw a cat approaching.

Pigeon's friends cried and shouted for it to run to a safer area, in a small hole or anywhere possible.

You know what this pigeon did.. closed its eyes and shouted back.... I do not see any cat ... I do not see any cat..

..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..

By anonymous• 15 Nov 2007 13:23
anonymous

Frog _ My wife knows Gypsy so don't worry about stones:)

By Gypsy• 15 Nov 2007 13:21
Gypsy

Also, many of these boys probably do know who both their mother and father are, but have been given up because their parents weren't married and it's unthinkable for a single mother to keep her child here.

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By Gypsy• 15 Nov 2007 13:20
Gypsy

Mrs. I said go to Dhreima, the orphanage off of Salwa, and you will meet about 100 odd boys (this orphanage is boys only, there's also a girls one) that are the product of out of wedlock liasons. I am NOT going to put one of these boys names on a public forum, but the fact of the matter is Dhreima is there and it's purpose is to care for abandoned and orphaned boys.

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 15 Nov 2007 13:15
skdkak closed 1708224867

Children with absolute 100% mom & pops in school records doesn't mean all is fine.

Everything can be adjusted with proper connexions. proper records in school does not mean there is no problem.

..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..

By Mrs.• 15 Nov 2007 13:14
Rating: 3/5
Mrs.

Show me any child (let's say Arabic) in any school in Doha who has no father (and mother) name, or who does not know his/her father (or mother), or whose parents are not married! Show me just one child from the tens of schools around Doha and I will declare that I know nothing about my Arab world!

"Be strong but not arrogant

Be modest but not weak"

S.H

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 15 Nov 2007 13:09
Rating: 2/5
skdkak closed 1708224867

You are wrong.

800,000 odd population are the total heads in Qatar. Out of which 2/3rd's are expats.. Mind you no expat with AIDS / HIV will be ever allowed to enter.

SO, we are talking about a bigger ratio with problems.

..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..

By anonymous• 15 Nov 2007 13:08
anonymous

Recently it was in the newspaper that there were ove 300 cases of AIDS here for the amont of people living here that is far to high and not to forget Qatar is small country.

Rape is here as it is all over the world.

Drugs are here and being used and there is addiction too.

Crime is growing every day.

Abandoned children - this does exist.

How do you know all children are legitmate - you are talking through a hole in your hat.

You see you have to check your fact before writing anything.

Anyway what does this all have to do with a sperm bank.

By Ragnarock Raider• 15 Nov 2007 13:07
Ragnarock Raider

You are justifying calling me ugly because I quoted what you said in another thread? Eventhough (to my knowledge) I have never called you any names?

How does that work exactly?

Stay safe all.

Perfection does not exist. The question therefore, is: what level of imperfection are we willing to settle for?

By Ragnarock Raider• 15 Nov 2007 13:04
Ragnarock Raider

Mais j'ai besoin de pratique je suis sur ;)

And my spelling is probably atrocious! LOL

Stay safe.

Perfection does not exist. The question therefore, is: what level of imperfection are we willing to settle for?

By Mrs.• 15 Nov 2007 13:02
Rating: 4/5
Mrs.

but dont forget that RR started the discussion with a personal attack that had nothing to do with the issue (they were made to be screwed) so it was only a pleasure for me to hit back!

Anyway, you will never find in the Quran a verse talking clearly about sperm doners/banks. You will find verses that tell you that humans were created in males & females in order for them to get married & reproduce and that sex outside marriage is adultry & is condemned, and you will find a scientific full description of the embro since it is a sperm & how life develops in that sperm...etc.

"Be strong but not arrogant

Be modest but not weak"

S.H

By Gypsy• 15 Nov 2007 13:00
Gypsy

Where are you getting your statistics Mrs? I'm working with Dhreima now, and almost all of the children there are the "illegitimate" children of Qataris, so all children can't be legitimate. As for sperm banks and donors, How do you know, as I said they are a common part of most fertility clinics.

Also you can't be certain of any statistics from this region because many many things are not reported to the actual public. Including the proper AIDS rates. (Although I believe it was placed at around 300 and some, which in a population of under 800,000 is pretty much on par with Western statistics).

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By Mrs.• 15 Nov 2007 12:53
Rating: 3/5
Mrs.

Here there are no sperm banks/doners

Rape is almost 0%

AIDS is almost 0%

All children are legitimate & know both of the parents

There are no married gays & lesbians

Crime is almost 0%

orphanages of abandoned children almost don't exist

Drugs & drug gangs & their wars does not exist (although there are drugs among young people, to a certain level)

Addiction is almost 0%

Gambling is almost 0%

But I am not saying that we live in a perfect society! We have our own problems which we do our best to eliminate. Most of the social problems here come from ignorance & lack of education which result in wrong translation of the teachings. Once we get to educate the people & help them understand the soul of the teachings, then a lot of the problems can be solved.

"Be strong but not arrogant

Be modest but not weak"

S.H

By anonymous• 15 Nov 2007 12:53
anonymous

Ton Francais est bien meilleure que ton sarcasme :D mais avec les claviers ici je comprend que c'est pas toujours facile :P

Some are Wise ... Some are ...Otherwise

By Ragnarock Raider• 15 Nov 2007 12:45
Ragnarock Raider

Bonne chance, mais je crois qu'elle est deja convainqu!

Hey how is my french by the way? Ca fait longtempt que je n'est pas ecrit en francais! lol

Stay safe.

Perfection does not exist. The question therefore, is: what level of imperfection are we willing to settle for?

By Ragnarock Raider• 15 Nov 2007 12:42
Ragnarock Raider

But denial is so much simpler than facing reality!

And why aren't you opposed the fertility clinics here in doha Mrs? Or any hospital for that matter....what do the holy books have to say about heart translplants? Surely they are against some old rule....I mean if god intended for someone to live they wouldn't have had heart problems!

Ok sarcasm aside...please tell me you see the danger in THAT kind of thinking Mrs??

Stay safe all.

Perfection does not exist. The question therefore, is: what level of imperfection are we willing to settle for?

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 15 Nov 2007 12:41
Rating: 2/5
skdkak closed 1708224867

Dont you know the answer of your ques...But all those "social diseases" are here too...

It is all because of western culture and by you westerners... (Not my reply...)

I have the power of knowing what she writes....LOL

..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..

By anonymous• 15 Nov 2007 12:38
anonymous

Merci Ragnarock ...Je vais tres bien Humdulilah et vous ?

I'll try to make Gypsy's day Inchallah :D

Some are Wise ... Some are ...Otherwise

By Gypsy• 15 Nov 2007 12:37
Gypsy

But all those "social diseases" are here too MRs?

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By anonymous• 15 Nov 2007 12:36
anonymous

"Well Mrs. I keep trying to call God on my phone, but I swear everytime I get a busy signal. To busy creating universes to be bothered by whether or not I want to get knocked up or not. :P "

Hummmm Gypsy, I think you are being sarcastic now, but I've decided not to go back for lunch to prepare a counter-attack :D You'll suffer my dear :)

Some are Wise ... Some are ...Otherwise

By the black prince• 15 Nov 2007 12:35
the black prince

Mrs, would you be so kind and find the approriate phrases from the Quran and quote them. I ask because I am interested to see if the holy books ban such things or, which is often the case, tell us what is right to do but do not say what is wrong. It is our interpretation of what is written, that if it says this is the right good way, all other ways are by definition are wrong and bad.

Why writing I have always found RAG to be extremely tolerant personality who tries to understand others and most importantly respects that others have the right to another opinion other than his.

Both you and I manage to discuss things without abuses simpley because understand the others right to an opinion, if you can discuss with me then you can shore discuss with RAG as he has a similar outlook on how he would like to ddiscuss things with people.

You anger never won an arguement, only good thoughtout points, well written and without anger or insults

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 15 Nov 2007 12:34
Rating: 3/5
skdkak closed 1708224867

There is a loop hole in that.

women baby makers on one side

Men in sperm bank on the other

Who does the job of a GOD (I will be killed now) to do the insemination.

..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..

By Mrs.• 15 Nov 2007 12:34
Rating: 2/5
Mrs.

Who said you can't? Go back to Canada (or any other 'developed' country) and have as many children as you like (from various banks)! As I said before: "we can't worry about the rain when we are soaking wet"! Those 'developed' countries already suffer from social diseases, so you will not be causing a serious damage!

"Be strong but not arrogant

Be modest but not weak"

S.H

By Ragnarock Raider• 15 Nov 2007 12:33
Ragnarock Raider

Comment ca va aujourdhui?

Care to join us? ;)

Stay safe.

Perfection does not exist. The question therefore, is: what level of imperfection are we willing to settle for?

By Gypsy• 15 Nov 2007 12:32
Gypsy

lol Sdkak, in our social studies books that was the definition of the average Canadian nucler family 2 kids and a dog. :D

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By anonymous• 15 Nov 2007 12:29
anonymous

LOL Here we go again the Famous Intelectual threesome " Gypsy,Ragnarock, and Mrs. hahahahah I'll be expecting new exciting episodes.

I just wanted to quote that before (

" Am afraid the world would end up into two sides. One side, women who are baby makers, the other side is men masturbating to "finance" the sperms bank." lol This is frustrating lol.ooops sorry :)

Some are Wise ... Some are ...Otherwise

By Gypsy• 15 Nov 2007 12:28
Gypsy

But Mrs. I don't believe in the Quran, the Bible or the Torah....so why can't I have a child on my own?

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 15 Nov 2007 12:28
Rating: 2/5
skdkak closed 1708224867

thats one good thing child psy.. has said. Child needs good care and love.

2.5 children ?????? Is the mother in nuclear family always pregnant.. Hahahahahahaha

..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..

By Ragnarock Raider• 15 Nov 2007 12:24
Ragnarock Raider

Wouldn't fertily clinics be immoral....after all its adultery to get inseminated by another man's sperm!

In fact...if God intended for infertile people to have kids he wouldn't have made them infertile no? Doesn't that apply to the whole medical field? Lets just scrap medicine and let god's plans unfold for all of us! LMAO

Stay safe all.

Perfection does not exist. The question therefore, is: what level of imperfection are we willing to settle for?

By Mrs.• 15 Nov 2007 12:22
Rating: 3/5
Mrs.

does not allow pregnancy/breeding without marriage. It is OK to use tubes in order to help a married couple to have children, but getting the sperm from a stranger man into a woman is totally banned. Besides religion, Arabs have great ficination in family trees. They have to know the whole family line of any person, so you might forget about this sperm banks/doners. Simply, if a woman wants to have children, she MUST get married, and it MUST be from her husband. Whether she likes it or not!

"Be strong but not arrogant

Be modest but not weak"

S.H

By Gypsy• 15 Nov 2007 12:22
Gypsy

Child psychologists say there is no more determental effect to raising a child in a single parent household as opposed to a nuclear family (Mom, Dad, 2.5 children), the basis to raising a happy, healthy child is love and a stable environment.

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By Ragnarock Raider• 15 Nov 2007 12:20
Rating: 3/5
Ragnarock Raider

Just as well....whenever presented with an irrefutable fact (like Arabs who WANT what you term diseases)...its easier to just dismiss it as the product of someone "unwise" therefore not worth addressing!LOL

I suppose it is better than the alternative...I honestly was expecting you to try and tell me I am not an Arab....thank you for not saying that at least.

Stay safe.

Perfection does not exist. The question therefore, is: what level of imperfection are we willing to settle for?

By Gypsy• 15 Nov 2007 12:19
Gypsy

Well Mrs. I keep trying to call God on my phone, but I swear everytime I get a busy signal. To busy creating universes to be bothered by whether or not I want to get knocked up or not. :P

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 15 Nov 2007 12:18
skdkak closed 1708224867

Thanks for bringing back the thread to where it belongs.

What does child psyclogists say is tight and for whom - what is right???????

..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..

By Gypsy• 15 Nov 2007 12:16
Rating: 2/5
Gypsy

No one is asking that sperm banks be opened in the Middle East (Although I believe there probably are as they are not just used by single women, but also by couples when the man turns out to be sterile. They are actually a part of every fertility clinic.)

I posted this article as a sign that this is becoming a common phenomena in the West for women to have children on their own when they are not sure they will find a husband and still want a child.

IF someone in the Middle East did want a sperm bank, then I suppose they would take it to the courts, and like Sharia in Australia, the courts would say no, until it could be proven that a majority of the people want it.

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By Mrs.• 15 Nov 2007 12:15
Mrs.

You are the last person who can provide me with logic or wise judgment (after all the wrong assumptions you made)

"Be strong but not arrogant

Be modest but not weak"

S.H

By the black prince• 15 Nov 2007 12:15
the black prince

Mrs, a question and a serious one so please help me here, as things like Sperm Banks etc are a relatively new technology, how does the Quran handle that. I mean for sure it wasnt covereed when the Quran was written..........how does a Muslim argue the pros and cons of such things?

By Mrs.• 15 Nov 2007 12:13
Mrs.

Here, check this:

God : Did you call me?

Me: Called you? No.....who is this?

God : This is GOD. I heard your prayers. So I thought I will chat.

Me: I do pray. Just makes me feel good. I am actually busy now. I am in the midst of something.

God : What are you busy at?

Me: Don't know. But I can’t find free time. Life has become hectic. It's rush hour all the time.

God : Well I wanted to resolve your fight for time, by giving you some clarity. In this next era, I wanted to reach you through the medium you are comfortable with.

Me: Tell me, why has life become complicated now?

God : Stop analyzing life. Just live it. Analysis is what makes it complicated.

Me: Why are we then constantly unhappy?

God : Your today is the tomorrow that you worried about yesterday. You are worrying because you are analyzing. Worrying has become your habit. That's why you are not happy

Me: But how can we not worry when there is so much uncertainty?

God : Uncertainty is inevitable, but worrying is optional.

Me: But then, there is so much pain due to uncertainty.....

God : Pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional.

Me: If suffering is optional, why do good people always suffer?

God : Diamond cannot be polished without friction. Gold cannot be purified without fire. Good people go through trials, but don't suffer. With that experience their life becomes better not bitter.

Me: You mean to say such experience is useful?

God : Yes. In all terms, Experience is a hard teacher. She gives the test first and the lessons afterwards.

Me: But still, why should we go through such tests? Why can’t we be free from problems?

God : Problems are Purposeful Roadblocks Offering Beneficial Lessons (to) Enhance Mental Strength. Inner strength comes from struggle and endurance, not when you are free from problems.

Me: Frankly in the midst of so many problems, we don't know where we are heading....

God : If you look outside you will not know where you are heading. Look inside. Looking outside, you dream. Looking inside, you awaken. Eyes provide sight. Heart provides insight.

Me: Sometimes not succeeding fast seems to hurt more than moving in the right direction. What should I do?

God : Success is a measure as decided by others. Satisfaction is a measure as decided by you. Knowing the road ahead is more satisfying than knowing you rode ahead. You work with the compass. Let others work with the clock.

Me: In tough times, how do you stay motivated?

God : Always look at how far you have come rather than how far you have to go. Always count your blessing, not what you are missing.

Me: What surprises you about people?

God : When they suffer they ask, "why me?" When they prosper, they never ask "Why me". Everyone wishes to have truth on their side, but few want to be on the side of the truth.

Me: Sometimes I ask, who am I, why am I here? I can’t get the answer.

God : Seek not to find who you are, but to determine who you want to be. Stop looking for a purpose as to why you are here. Create it. Life is not a process of discovery but a process of creation.

Me: How can I get the best out of life?

God : Face your past without regret. Handle your present with confidence. Prepare for the future without fear.

Me: One last question. Sometimes I feel my prayers are not answered.

God : There are no unanswered prayers. At times the answer is NO.

Me: Thank you for this wonderful chat. I now have a new sense of inspiration.

God : Keep the faith and drop the fear. Don't believe your doubts and doubt your beliefs. Life is a mystery to solve not a problem to resolve. Trust me. Life is wonderful if you know how to live.

Cheers!

"Be strong but not arrogant

Be modest but not weak"

S.H

By Ragnarock Raider• 15 Nov 2007 12:12
Ragnarock Raider

Are you sitting down?

Hi...i'm an Arab, and I want sperm donors and sperm banks! and I know (personally because I went to university with them) HUNDREDS who do!

Any other questions? LOL

Stay safe.

Perfection does not exist. The question therefore, is: what level of imperfection are we willing to settle for?

By the black prince• 15 Nov 2007 12:10
the black prince

Good morning Gypsy...........nice to see you.........

By Mrs.• 15 Nov 2007 12:10
Rating: 3/5
Mrs.

and no arabs want sperm doners & sperm banks!

This theory can NEVER be, so better deal with the facts we have!

"Be strong but not arrogant

Be modest but not weak"

S.H

By Gypsy• 15 Nov 2007 12:08
Gypsy

Ok, so far we have established that "God" doesn't like it (or at least the religious communities don't), but child psychologists say it's fine. Soooo, given that God doesn't answer my phone calls, I think I'll go with the child psychologists. :P

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 15 Nov 2007 12:06
Rating: 4/5
skdkak closed 1708224867

Why are you trying to be GOD of 21st century.

Let any country do what it feels good for the country. Why are you pissed. Is it you are not a citizen of that country and is depressed.

As for they acting against the nature or not as per (so to say) God's laws.. Let them face the creator when ever the opportunity comes.

Stop meddling and commenting like an expert in all the topics. It will make your life less miserable and you might (MIGHT.....) live more happily and let people around you live happily too.

..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..

By knoxcollege• 15 Nov 2007 12:06
knoxcollege

It is easier said than done..... to leave and forge alliances with others.

Anyways for the question Why do all topics end up with God?

bcoz for some God's words are final and for those who do not believe in God, NOTHING IS FINAL.

Hope you understand what I mean.

By the black prince• 15 Nov 2007 12:05
the black prince

My appologies.......it wasnt deliberate, was away for a couple of days and didnt check the old posts.........sorry and thank you for the kind words.

By Mrs.• 15 Nov 2007 12:05
Rating: 4/5
Mrs.

Not all topics end up with God! (at least the ones about the new traffic law, didn't)

A topic like this would propabley end up with God since some nations were free to choose to live without Divine laws, decided to have their 'freedom' and their own (civil) laws until they ended up with gays or lesbians marrying each other, sperm doners, sperm banks...etc. They found themselves drawning in a swamp and can not go back. Now they want to convince the rest of the nations who prefered to believe in God & His wisdom, that if you follow them, then you are 'civilized, well-educated, liberal, western, open-minded, good...etc', and if you prefer to believe in God, Divine laws, want to preserve the values of your family, society, and country, then you are "terrorist, narrow-minded, stone-aged, uncivilized, retarded, bad, evil...etc"

I say; whoever wants sheria, GET THE HELL OUT OF AUSTRALIA & GO TO A COUNTRY OF SHERIA! Whoever wants a sperm bank & illegitimate children, GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE & GO BACK TO WHERE YOU CAME FROM!

Fair enough?

"Be strong but not arrogant

Be modest but not weak"

S.H

By Ragnarock Raider• 15 Nov 2007 12:05
Ragnarock Raider

Your arguments make sense for expats...what about locals?

If Autralians want Sharia they should get kicked out? and if Middle Easteners want freedom they should also be exiled?

Some of these issues are at the core of societies (within themselves) and not just a clash of civilizations as the media portray it.

Should Qatar allow freedoms or should it clamp down? This is what Qataris have to decide for themselves! What we do is offer the 2 choices:

You explain the evil diseases of liberalism and pleade with them to return to divine laws....

And I warn of the dangers of going backwards in time and extol the virues of choice...

Stay safe all.

Perfection does not exist. The question therefore, is: what level of imperfection are we willing to settle for?

By Mrs.• 15 Nov 2007 12:03
Mrs.

so you decided to talk to me again!

Last time I checked, I posted a sincere message to you thanking you for your advices but never heard from you!

"Be strong but not arrogant

Be modest but not weak"

S.H

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 15 Nov 2007 11:58
skdkak closed 1708224867

Discussions gives you more knowledge and it increases the activity of ones grey cells...

But who will explain them.. u know who, they are like one among those in my signature.

..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..

By the black prince• 15 Nov 2007 11:54
the black prince

Rag, you and me both, through good debate one extends ones knowledge and understanding.

By Ragnarock Raider• 15 Nov 2007 11:52
Ragnarock Raider

I am even tryig to ignore people INSLUTING me....I just like to debate because you always learn new stuff =)

Stay safe all.

Perfection does not exist. The question therefore, is: what level of imperfection are we willing to settle for?

By the black prince• 15 Nov 2007 11:51
the black prince

Good Morning Mrs, how are we today, I see you have manged to get some people upset again...........you know my thoughts on that dont you now...

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 15 Nov 2007 11:50
skdkak closed 1708224867

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Dont ask me in public. I have dealt with the similar situation few times already.

..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..

By Ragnarock Raider• 15 Nov 2007 11:50
Ragnarock Raider

So its plain to see how calling bigotry ugly is different than calling someone ugly dear.

As for my opinions being questionable....History is not an opinion. When you dismiss it because it blows holes in your theories you just come across as delusional....but again you are entitled to your beliefs.

Stay safe all.

Perfection does not exist. The question therefore, is: what level of imperfection are we willing to settle for?

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 15 Nov 2007 11:47
skdkak closed 1708224867

Chillax..

Discussions are always for and against. You cannot have a discussion if no one is opposing your point of view but it should never come down to name calling and getting personal. I agree some people here always start agressively and ultimately come down to what they are good at.

Just relax and ignore all such characters.

..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..

By anonymous• 15 Nov 2007 11:46
anonymous

Intelligent discussions never manage really to take off because although there are people with fundemental knowledge and who can discuss and debate they will always be put down as someone will find fault and stick a negative into the thread - don't you know.

By Mrs.• 15 Nov 2007 11:46
Mrs.

When you twist history to suit you, it is easy also to twist facts about who started the insults. I am only a mirror my dear!

"Be strong but not arrogant

Be modest but not weak"

S.H

By Ragnarock Raider• 15 Nov 2007 11:43
Ragnarock Raider

I don't know what it is about Mrs. but she seems intent on insulting me.

She will fly into a rage if anyone insults her but has no qualms about throwing digs at others like calling ME ugly when I used the term to describe bigotry. She thinks that by highlighting it as a direct quote from me I don't notice the insult. Rest assured I do, but choose to do my damdest to keep this debate from degenerating into another name calling thread.

There are people on this forum who even have the same views as Mrs with regards to these issues, but I have no problem discussing and even disagreeing with them on other threads....but I don't know what it is about Mrs personality and mine that just always seems to clash.

Anyways, I harbor no ill will....I honestly think that everyone is entitled to whatever they want to believe in (even if I vehemontly disagree with it)...as long as they are not harming others.

Stay safe.

Perfection does not exist. The question therefore, is: what level of imperfection are we willing to settle for?

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 15 Nov 2007 11:42
Rating: 3/5
skdkak closed 1708224867

There are different types of people.

I think most of us live by what we think is right and dont interfere with th lives of others.

And there are some who think their way of thinking and way to live is the only better way. All other thoughts are irrelevant for them. They feel threatened for even hearing something which they do not approve of.

Then there are irrational people also (Jack of all trades, Master of None)... give these characters a topic to discuss and there you screw your brains. You will hardly get a logical and relevent response from them.

..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..

By Mrs.• 15 Nov 2007 11:40
Mrs.

you start to imagine that Divine laws had anything to do with Hamurabi's. You start to invent your own version in history to suit your beliefs although almost all people know the correct version of history, which is different than yours.

You even want to convince people that believing in God is a justification of discrimination, which is a very funny & silly theory.

All in all, and post after post, you are only proving that you can make wrong assumption, and your logic is questionable.

"Be strong but not arrogant

Be modest but not weak"

S.H

By Ragnarock Raider• 15 Nov 2007 11:36
Ragnarock Raider

Those who disaprove of something and cannot justify it logically have to revert to an ancient text that bans it and doesn't even allow you to question why it is banned.

Stay safe all.

Perfection does not exist. The question therefore, is: what level of imperfection are we willing to settle for?

By Ragnarock Raider• 15 Nov 2007 11:33
Ragnarock Raider

When you say no I don't believe in history is when you are cancelling your brain....case in point, our previous discussion on Hamurabi's laws.

But justifying discrimination and bigotry with belief in god goes against the very principle of belief in god does it not? Too bad you cannot see that irony.

Stay safe.

Perfection does not exist. The question therefore, is: what level of imperfection are we willing to settle for?

By Mrs.• 15 Nov 2007 11:28
Mrs.

"Since there is no god"

So once again you are totally wrong

"Be strong but not arrogant

Be modest but not weak"

S.H

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 15 Nov 2007 11:27
skdkak closed 1708224867

Why do all topics end up with GOD.

This thread was meant to comment on earthly males. We keep going to GOD every time.

I propose QL need to start www.godql.com hahahahahahhaa

..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..

By anonymous• 15 Nov 2007 11:21
anonymous

How many Gods do we have then??

Again up to insulting Ragnarock Raider who actually has a very good clear open opinion about what goes on the world and discusses it in a civilised and thoughful manner, and more than can be said for you.

By Ragnarock Raider• 15 Nov 2007 11:20
Ragnarock Raider

Since there is no god....the worst social disease is following centuries old bigotry and prejudices...which in effect is using an outaded brain to try and live in the past and stoping the world from evolving.

But then again ALL religions have done that since the dawn of time....and all eventually fade away when they cannot adapt to current life.

Stay safe.

Perfection does not exist. The question therefore, is: what level of imperfection are we willing to settle for?

By Mrs.• 15 Nov 2007 11:10
Rating: 3/5
Mrs.

The biggest social disease in the world is not using your brain, pretending to be wiser than a God, then finding yourself in a swamp, which you are to 'proud' to admit!

"Be strong but not arrogant

Be modest but not weak"

S.H

By Ragnarock Raider• 15 Nov 2007 10:05
Ragnarock Raider

in places where unwise people like you just label anything that goes against their musty old texts "diseases"!

There is a reason why these diseased societies are TOLERANT of anything different...but that is very threating to the closeminded societies like the ones you seem to champion.

And "ugly" was a description of the bigotry and closeminded behaviour, but since you feel like applying it to me personally because I will now bow down to your definitions of what a good/repressed society must be like, then we might as well go ahead and label entire way of thinking as just that.

The biggest social disease in the world is not using your brain, pretending to be sheep, and trying and bring the clock back thousands of years.

Stay safe.

Perfection does not exist. The question therefore, is: what level of imperfection are we willing to settle for?

By Mrs.• 15 Nov 2007 09:54
Mrs.

So you see everything that is different to you your wrongful beliefs, as "musty old texts"!!!

So you are one of the "ugliest things in the world" because you are full of "Bigotry and discrimintaion"!!!

And always making wrong assumptions is a solid proof that you cannot have a wise debate.

People like me accept the fact that Australia has the right to ban Sharia law inside Australia, but people like you feel angry & frustrated because societies, such as here, are true believers in their religions & are against social diseases like sperm doners & sperm banks. People like you feel angry when they can not spread the disease here!

"Be strong but not arrogant

Be modest but not weak"

S.H

By Ragnarock Raider• 15 Nov 2007 09:41
Rating: 5/5
Ragnarock Raider

It goes both ways....if societies close to "god" promoduce people as closeminded and selective in their logic as you, then you can have them too.

Bigotry and discrimintaion are some of the ugliest things in the world, and if you are unable to see past that, but choose to interject them in every topic, then your assumptions about reality are questionalble and proves you cannot have a wise debate either. I would argue that its MUCH more harmful to allow polygamy in society than single parent houselholds, but I know you will disagree with me because your musty old texts tell you differently. They are still wrong in my opinion....but who am I to tell people they are not allowed to live in the stone age if they want, as long as they are not hurting anyone.

To each his own.

Stay safe.

Perfection does not exist. The question therefore, is: what level of imperfection are we willing to settle for?

By Mrs.• 15 Nov 2007 09:33
Mrs.

Who said it is hard for me to let others do what they want? See? Another wrong assumption from you which proves that you are not qualified for wise debates because all your judgments are wrong!

I think people are free to do in their countries/communities whatever they feel. They are free to have in their countries whatever social diseases they want. They are free to absorb the consequences (such as having people like you)

Now one comes to wonder; let women get pregnant from doners, banks and men passing by, or let men have more than 1 wife? Which is in favor of preserving the society?

"Be strong but not arrogant

Be modest but not weak"

S.H

By Gypsy• 15 Nov 2007 09:26
Gypsy

I know Ragna. Damn that MSN news. :P

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By Ragnarock Raider• 15 Nov 2007 09:24
Ragnarock Raider

Controversial topics that is lol

Good morning Mrs...can't say that i'm suprised to see you disagreeing with the article....women going to the perm bank? Sacriligious adultery....they are not fulfilling their "role"....they were made to be screwed after all right? LOL

Social diseases indeed....let them get into an illegal polygamus relationship like "god told them to" and then just get smacked lightly! The only way to live a happy life is to be repressed by men thumping hunderds of years old badly plaguarized purposefuly vague texts ;)

You can do what YOU want Mrs....but why is it so hard for you to let others do what THEY want?

Stay safe.

Perfection does not exist. The question therefore, is: what level of imperfection are we willing to settle for?

By Gypsy• 15 Nov 2007 09:24
Gypsy

Ah, but if you are getting pregnant from a sperm donor you aren't having sex. ;)

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By Mrs.• 15 Nov 2007 09:12
Rating: 4/5
Mrs.

Gypsy, it is not only bad, it is actually, totally banned! Not just getting pregnant....SEX itself is totally banned between non-married couples! This is what ALL holy books agree upon. They wanted to differentiate between man & animals!

"Be strong but not arrogant

Be modest but not weak"

S.H

By Gypsy• 15 Nov 2007 09:02
Gypsy

Mrs, please correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think it says anywhere in the Holy Books that raising a child on your own is bad? Or that a woman in her 40s having a child on her own is bad. I think your ideas come more from long held cultural mores then anything God said.

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By Mrs.• 15 Nov 2007 08:37
Rating: 2/5
Mrs.

Lost & desperate women, no men willing to commit, sperm doners, sperm banks, getting pregnant without a husband (adultry under cover), dating while pregnant, bringing more illegitimate children to this world, gays allowed to adpot, lesbians allowed to adopt...etc...etc...etc....need I say more about social diseases? Do you see the consequences of people drifting away for God's rules? Why can't some communities just lead a normal life? Were they wrong when they taught us in schools that the family is the heart & soul of any society?

"Be strong but not arrogant

Be modest but not weak"

S.H

By anonymous• 15 Nov 2007 03:03
Rating: 4/5
anonymous

My Confession Booth is available for a mutual conversation with those ladies with biological clocks dis-funtionality.

The Red Pope of Qatar Living

It would be great if people still used donkeys in everyday life, that way you could say to some chick "hey, nice asses!" and she wouldn't mind.

By Spiderman• 15 Nov 2007 01:52
Spiderman

[img_assist|nid=48646|title=who wants my Sperms|desc=|link=none|align=center|width=|height=0]

By Spiderman• 15 Nov 2007 01:48
Spiderman

[img_assist|nid=48787|title=SpermDonor|desc=|link=none|align=center|width=|height=0]

By SPEED• 15 Nov 2007 01:43
SPEED

You are genious ..... just made my day ....... hahhahha

thas really very funny .... LMFAO

By SPEED• 15 Nov 2007 01:40
SPEED

MAN U R JUST GENIOUS ...... LMAO .... hahhahaaa

can't stop laughing .... hhahahhaaa

[img_assist|nid=44232|title=|desc=|link=none|align=center|width=|height=0]

By thatguy• 15 Nov 2007 01:40
thatguy

actually thats what happens when you have a planned child in a mother and father relation ship hahahahahahahahahahahaha

just kidding

____________________________________________________

just hanging out and watching dvd's with helen keller... kind of a quite night.

By anonymous• 15 Nov 2007 01:35
anonymous

ROFLMAO, that is a good one.....

The Red Pope of Qatar Living

Egomania goes with the territory of decoding your own genome.

By Spiderman• 15 Nov 2007 01:34
Spiderman

This is what happens when you have child from Unknown sperms ....

[img_assist|nid=48668|title=|desc=|link=none|align=center|width=|height=0]

By anonymous• 15 Nov 2007 01:31
anonymous

Too much Coffee in my blood stream.....

I'm a Night shift worker and can't sleep during the night. Only during the day..

The Red Pope of Qatar Living

Egomania goes with the territory of decoding your own genome.

By Spiderman• 15 Nov 2007 01:30
Spiderman

[img_assist|nid=48625|title=|desc=|link=none|align=center|width=|height=0] hmmmmmmm.... i know wats going on in here ... sssshhhh

By SPEED• 15 Nov 2007 01:26
SPEED

Hey POPE ... wat r u doing so late in QL ? for me i just wake up and had to go to work again at 630am ... NO SLEEP MAN

By anonymous• 15 Nov 2007 01:25
Rating: 2/5
anonymous

Probably she is visiting Michael Jackson at Bahrain....Is his new bleach my skin camp and Bimbo beach resort.

The Red Pope of Qatar Living

Egomania goes with the territory of decoding your own genome.

By SPEED• 15 Nov 2007 01:11
SPEED

Gypsy .. talk something which makes sense ! You are talking about 1% of such people in the world mainly in US n Europe who adopt such practice ... I am sure even in Europe or US majority of people will not accept such practice !

It's just SUCKS .... who will accept PRAGNENT women having child with UNKNOW SPERM or SPERMS ??

I don't think any Good Society will accept !!

By thatguy• 15 Nov 2007 00:38
Rating: 2/5
thatguy

i think you mis understanding me

i say that it doesnt matter if some one does have one or two parents its all about the parents

you seem to being saying the same thing... and if you are not... then i am saying you are wrong... but ... if you think that it is ok for some to have only one planned parent then i am sorry for the misunderstanding

____________________________________________________

just hanging out and watching dvd's with helen keller... kind of a quite night.

By KellysHeroes• 15 Nov 2007 00:35
KellysHeroes

if you like to mislead yourself with your own experience and theories, do not mislead the world.

let aside nature and religion. simply look around and find out how many families are there with "planned" single parent.

not convinced? go to any mall over the weekend. count how man kids are accompanied by both parents and how many are with single parent (thought this does not mean the other parent does not exist).

even gays and lesbians, tend to marry (same sex) and adopt a kid to establish a complete family (according to them).

By thatguy• 15 Nov 2007 00:18
thatguy

uh duh... but your generalizing too...

see there is no right or wrong way that will work all the time...

so dont give me this im generalizing crap... how many familys have you grown up in... one... so you only know your own experience...

enough said... again

____________________________________________________

just hanging out and watching dvd's with helen keller... kind of a quite night.

By KellysHeroes• 15 Nov 2007 00:12
Rating: 2/5
KellysHeroes

sorry. you cannot generalize your experience.

the norm is that the child should be grown up by his mother and father. The opposite is the exception.

By thatguy• 14 Nov 2007 23:27
thatguy

there is no such thing as a fantasy world

i my self grew up in a broken home... and i am a stronger person for it... and i am glad i grew up with just one parent... because growing up with one parent who loved me and charished me is better than growing up with a drunk abusive father... and if you want to contest that... PM me because i dont have the patients for people to say that its better to have a family that is together for the child... that is the dumbest thing i ever heard...

enough said

____________________________________________________

just hanging out and watching dvd's with helen keller... kind of a quite night.

By KellysHeroes• 14 Nov 2007 23:23
KellysHeroes

There is a lot of selfishness in this thread. The woman is considering her own needs/desires/fantasies. Only concerned about her date feelings or whatever.

I did not see any serious consideration for the kids needs and feelings and rights. Yes there are many orphans. But the kid's minimum rights is to know who is his mother and who is his father.

Am afraid the world would end up into two sides. One side, women who are baby makers, the other side is men masturbating to "finance" the sperms bank.

My advise. Live the real and proper life and let's all go back to proper values.

By thatguy• 14 Nov 2007 22:39
thatguy

a shower massage... yeah right... since when does that not lead to...

oh wait your talking about her self... aaaa... i seee... hhmmmm... never mind

____________________________________________________

just hanging out and watching dvd's with helen keller... kind of a quite night.

By anonymous• 14 Nov 2007 22:04
Rating: 4/5
anonymous

If those woman choose to go that route, is their choice.

Hopefully they are obligated by law to notified their whole intent to their lovers, friends and parents.

Example:

Legally, If you have HIV, you are suppose to tell everyone around you. Including your partner for safety and Hygienic reasons.

There is a big technical legality behind it.

1- The worst part is that they could use that method to tramp a man in believing that the unborn is theirs.

2- Don't claim alimony from the register sperm donor later on your life for your decision, If you regret it and you go financially broke.

3- Don't make the State tax payers your decision, a parasitic burden.

I'm glad that DNA testing is available.

The Red Pope of Qatar Living

Egomania goes with the territory of decoding your own genome.

By thatguy• 14 Nov 2007 21:33
thatguy

pearl i must agree with gypsy... there is nothing wrong with this... as a matter of fact... there are many single parents in the states who are raising children with out any problems...

____________________________________________________

just hanging out and watching dvd's with helen keller... kind of a quite night.

By Gypsy• 14 Nov 2007 21:30
Gypsy

Says who? Religious leaders? "God"? Because Child psychologists say the only thing a child needs is a loving stable environment, which is easily provided by a single parent.

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By pearl of qatar• 14 Nov 2007 21:27
pearl of qatar

This kind of arrangement can never be in the best interests of any child.

By diamond• 14 Nov 2007 20:52
diamond

Aaw, Froggie!

_______________________________________________________

Love is the answer...

By anonymous• 14 Nov 2007 20:42
anonymous

DG ..... What about a 34 years old boy ? He's so adoptable :D North africa :P

Some are Wise ... Some are ...Otherwise

By Gypsy• 14 Nov 2007 20:08
Rating: 2/5
Gypsy

Black Prince, Canada and the US allow single parents to adopt. Also it's a feminist subject, quite obviously many men don't think a woman can raise a child on there own, or are intimidated when they realize that women don't really NEED them (Want them yes, need them no). However I don't think men are being regulated to sperm in this article, I think they are saying that you can't right off men just because you've decided it's time for children and you still haven't found Mr. Right. And marriage is a part of this article, if these women weren't interested in marriage they wouldn't be dating. THis whole thing is actually a part of a growing trend in the West amongst women who feel their biological clocks ticking, yet still can't find Mr. Right. Several of my girlfriends back home are considering this as an option, now that they are in their mid 30s.

Frog, Lots of people raise children on their own. I went to school with several people who had fathers or mothers die when they were quite young, they weren't unbalanced. Are you saying orphans are unbalanced? One parent can raise a child very easily and it's quite common.

Salax, when you go to a sperm bank they let you know things like race, IQ levels, physical appearance, etc. of the donor, they don't just give you a random sample of sperm. Actually you have less choice if you want to adopt, as waiting lists are 7 to 10 years long and getting an infant is next to impossible UNLESS you adopt a minority child.

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By diamond• 14 Nov 2007 19:56
diamond

umm...thinking...Cambodia, Russia...Vietnam...Ethiopia...sure there's more...will have to look through some files...

_______________________________________________________

Love is the answer...

By the black prince• 14 Nov 2007 19:50
the black prince

DG..........which country?

By diamond• 14 Nov 2007 19:49
diamond

I think it's a good idea. I was thinking of doing something like that at one point in my life.

And adoption can be done by one parent. It depends on the country.

_______________________________________________________

Love is the answer...

By the black prince• 14 Nov 2007 19:23
the black prince

Salax.........the only problem is to adopt a chi;ld you need a stable family surround, that means 2 parents mother /father............for these ladies that dont work mate

By misty_rain• 14 Nov 2007 19:01
misty_rain

Feeling sorry for them, who has to date while pregnant...

:(

By the black prince• 14 Nov 2007 16:23
the black prince

Hi Spiderman............it aint funny my friend..........I spent my whole damn life standing up womens rights, supporting there fight for equality, trying to understand and help where I could.........and when I read this posting I just got classified as a Sperm Bank with no use at all.......to be placed in the same catagory with the attitude some men have about women as just a baby bag, which such ignorance I have fought against...........all I can say is thanks ladies

By Spiderman• 14 Nov 2007 16:14
Spiderman

Hey guys !!!!! Don't waste your time in TOILETS .... start donating from today .. LOL

!! shame on such society where child doesn't know who was his father !

[img_assist|nid=48678|title=|desc=|link=none|align=center|width=|height=0]

By the black prince• 14 Nov 2007 16:12
the black prince

Gypsy, sorry but you are wrong about marriage, this article is about, I quote "The women out there doing it have made a careful, considered decision to try for motherhood before their biological clock rings." and secondly the word marriage is only used once in this article, at the end and only to state that the lady got married AFTER she got pregnant using the Sperm Bank Method

By anonymous• 14 Nov 2007 15:55
anonymous

Yeah Yeah Yeah Gypsy .... Everything is men's fault and Women are angels with white wings on their backs. Romantic image, isn't it?

My dear, you should have a more long-term vision. What about those children who will have no father? Do you think they will have a balanced life? " Father's Job : ..........hummm ? huh?..... Sperm Donor . LOL" that would be fun :d

Sometimes women (equally as men) miss their chance of getting a man/woman with whom they may marry and set a family. They're being superficial, looking for princes/princesses that would never turn up. American Reality T.V has ruined our taste. Beauty standards are ironically limiting our choice. What about those who do not fit? Are they condomned to become "annonymous Sperm Donors?"

Some are Wise ... Some are ...Otherwise

By taliesin• 14 Nov 2007 15:54
taliesin

I would think though that by the time a woman has reached her forties and decided on the sperm donor route, then dating would be off the agenda for a while. The emotional and physical investment required for both at the same time would be too much for anyone with any sense.

***********

"There's this thing called being so open-minded your brains drop out". - Richard Dawkins

By anonymous• 14 Nov 2007 15:50
anonymous

Hello Char:) I imagine what would happen if your wife heard that. She'd probably throw some stones on your grave In .... Doha :D

Some are Wise ... Some are ...Otherwise

By Amigo66• 14 Nov 2007 15:49
Amigo66

It sounds like going to a store to buy a dvd(of unknown make) or ingrdients......lol

By the black prince• 14 Nov 2007 15:49
the black prince

Gypsy, the topic is interesting but I just wish you hadnt picked such a feminist orientated article.

By anonymous• 14 Nov 2007 15:41
anonymous

Aiyh Gypsy again the same subject. How about marring the most commited man in doha (me):)

By Gypsy• 14 Nov 2007 15:35
Gypsy

The point of this article isn't that these women Don't want to get married Frog, it's that they want to get married, can't find a man to marry them and they're in their 40's and still want children. If you can't find a man who wants to have children with you, why not have one on your own? why miss out on the joys of motherhood because men can't commit?

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By anonymous• 14 Nov 2007 15:35
anonymous

Frog - Are you the Altar Boy to Red_Pope:)

By anonymous• 14 Nov 2007 15:23
Rating: 5/5
anonymous

Well Gypsy.... good afternoon first :)

(speechless) I just don't know what to start with now that I've finished reading this.

I never knew you refused to get married though you refered to this on your thread on Marriage . I just don't think it's something really advisable to start a one-parent family. Family is based on a specific balance and such a thing could never be set without a pair. That's what I believe and you're free to think otherwise.

Now for combining dating and being pregnant, It's rather selfish to take some and not the whole of a relationship. You wanna (as the french proverb says ) Butter and butter's money. ( Le beure et l'argent du beure). I think you should take it all or leave it all. An intimate relationship is not a game my dear :) It's a decision to take and a risk to run. seeking perfection would lead a woman nowhere.

I just quoted some parts of the article:

"But she’s glad she used that condom instead of risking pregnancy with a guy who might not be husband or father material."

-----------> Completely nonsense.

"the clock is ticking" : so it's just another desperate housewife this Louise solan:D

"When it comes to intimacy, honesty is key, if you want the relationship to have long-term potential." Totally agree, but I don't think getting pregrant by another man ( donnor) has anything to do with Honesty.............. to be continued

Some are Wise ... Some are ...Otherwise

By owen• 14 Nov 2007 15:11
Rating: 4/5
owen

hmmmm this procedure is quite interesting and how was it presented/explained (or advertise) in this write up....well, you got nothing to lose...you got a child in the end and dating/finding a guy who would be open minded with this arrangement would be a challenge (but worth it, if you bag one)...

Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood.

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 14 Nov 2007 15:01
Rating: 2/5
skdkak closed 1708224867

having children should be the decision of a woman especially single woman.

..**.. ""They walk among us. They vote & they even reproduce"" ..**..

By Gypsy• 14 Nov 2007 14:55
Gypsy

I just thought it was interesting cause I've been saying I'll do this in a few years if I still don't want to get married. It's nice to know I can still date while doing it. ;)

"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco

By Tigasin321• 14 Nov 2007 14:54
Tigasin321

I am presuming this comes from the States?

Victory attained by violence is tantamount to a defeat, for it is momentary. Mahatma Gandhi

By the black prince• 14 Nov 2007 14:53
the black prince

Gypsy..............I really dont know where to start, so Im not going to........reading this just made an old romantic like me just depressed

By KellysHeroes• 14 Nov 2007 14:53
Rating: 3/5
KellysHeroes

Now it is lunch time. The title is tempting to read. A bit lengthy. Besides, am a slow reader. Will give it a try sometime. No, am not talking about dating a pregnant lady. Reading your thread :)

By DaRuDe• 14 Nov 2007 14:48
DaRuDe

all i can do is read first 2 lines rest i cant so hmmm what

ok let me try :?

[img_assist|nid=21285|title=.|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]

By starseed• 14 Nov 2007 14:47
Rating: 3/5
starseed

always wins out in the end... if he won't stick around knowing your agenda then he's not the one - perhaps

^>*^>*^>*^>*^>*^>*^>*

If you never did, you should. These things are fun, and fun is good. - Dr Seuss

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