How to cook a Turkey

With Christmas just moments away I am reliably informed that Self Basting Turkeys will not be available in Carrefour this year. In view of this it has been suggested that the simple alternative is to get a normal frozen one and shove it in the tumble dryer this coming saturday to allow plenty of time for your turkey to be golden brown and succulent on the 25th - Christmas Day. Have any of your members ever tried this? Should it be stuffed first?

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By Lucky Luciano• 26 Nov 2015 08:18

Ask a Russian.

By britexpat• 26 Nov 2015 06:42

is it a front loading or a Top loading dryer ?

This is key to the whole process.

The best thing to do is start with a glass of wine.

Then turn on shower (hot)

Have a glass of wine

Undress

have a glass of wine

Take turkey and step into shower

Allow frozen turkey to slowly thaw

Step out and have a glass of wine

Now, where was I ?

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How to cook a Turkey

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