ANTI-SOCIAL BEHAVIOUR AND HARASSMENT IN DOHA COMPOUND
We are ex-pats and have been in Doha for two years. We've lived in our current property for six months, but are currently undergoing a distressing and baffling experience.
We live in an Al Waab compound - part of a well-known and reputable group of compounds. However we are having problems with certain ex-pat residents. It started with their children playing football outside our villa (noisy and disturbing, as well as potentially damaging to our cars and villa) but has escalated into outright harassment from the children and the parents. We asked politely on numerous occasions for the children to play elsewhere, however all requests were ignored by children and parents.
This escalated into purposeful kicking of the ball into our carport, cars and villa, abuse in the street, jumping in front of our car as we drove into the compound at 11pm. We've also had eggs thrown at our villa.
The father of one of the children even spoke to us, and threatened us if we harassed his children - completely ignoring the fact it is HIS child harassing US! When compound management went to speak to the people concerned about the issue, they came out THAT VERY NIGHT, singing and taunting us directly outside the villa.
This is obviously a ridiculous and distressing situation, where both adults and children are being completely disrespectful of others basic rights. It's more akin to the type of lowlife "ASBO" (anti-social behaviour) which is endemic in the UK - NOT what one would expect in an reputable compound in Doha.
Has anyone else come across anything like this? If so, how did you deal with it? Or do you have any suggestions yourself?
ndat, Don;t be daft, engr2002 Can't be an Arab, He (or she) can spell. Could be Idian, but to think they can drive..that's a mistake. Drive me mad on the roads here....
Back to the matter in hand, (although somewhat out of date) Crap neighbors.
I have a similar issue, I live on a nice compound, over Al Rayyan way. I do have children myself, by the way.
But my kids are in bed (on school nights) by 7pm, yet the other kids (Indians or pakistani from thier native, Bolton, UK) are playing out till 9.30/10pm screaming and shouting. They are a pain in the backside, but having said that no matter where they are from, if I ask them to quieten down because my kids are trying to sleep, they will do it, and very soon after that they go in themselves.
I tend to agree with engr2002, in that its the white trash (in my case Northerners not scoucers) that cause more agro.
But Having said all that, Kids will be Kids.
As for the al wabb compound, there are a number of them,(now) the one on Al Wabb itself, is for Hamad Hospital staff only (apparently), if it's not then there is a bloody big park up the road, with countless football pitches, for the teenagers to have a kick around.
Kellyhereos was just being sarcastic from what i read...oh and engr2002...maybe hes in an Arab country because he is an Arab....your offended by the Arab comment but you just offended Indians and the English people..Go figure!!!!
Good post by Umhamza. KellysHeores is picking on Arabs and why in Hell are you here in this Arab country???? Why don't you move to India for example where people respect neigbors and they drive so nice :-) :-)
Or move to a white trash soccer-mad 6-pack lowlife neigborhood in Liverpool, England!!!!
KellysHeroes says
"2. by default, Arabs do not respect neighborhood"
Arabs are far more respectful than some of the western expats who get drunk and act very loud and brazen and have loud music and wild parties.
Notice that you are most lucky if you have a Qatari neigbot because Qataris are the most well-behaved and civilized people on earth.
Too bad there are no Qataris in compounds and apartment buildings because they prefer stand alone villas for good reason. To avoid bad neigbors, loud drunken neighbors, smelly filthy neigbors etc.
i think that i post the similar question why they should be arabs to be impolite or aggressive and answer was that kids are westerner , what ever they are they need place to jump, scream and play!!!!!
KellysHeroes don't be aggressive and non respectable about arabs ( Arabs do not respect neighborhood????) , first read all post and after that put the words in right meanings
i don't read in any comments that any one said the words mention in your post ,
people please respect each other!!!! Either you are Westerner or Arab or Asians or... we are all hear to help each other and give little freedom to our souls and feel that there is some one care about your pain, problem or touts !!!
1. when you have a problem, do not go to authorities. They will deport the victim
2. by default, Arabs do not respect neighborhood
3. when harassed, do not complain. just surrender and beg
4. if you want peaceful life, live as a detective
5. streets are not for driving cars. streets are for playing football
6. if your neighbor throw an egg at your villa or car, send him a flower
7. green fields and playgrounds are just for decoration
8. if we need peace, we have to find a house which is 10 miles away from civilization.
come on guys. does this make sense?
cameras guys, camera camera camera.
When driving in, have a camera rolling.
When inside and hearing things, camera rolling.
Then report them and slam them with the evidence.
Unbelievable that adults would act this way.
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Where they arabs? why does people have to ask immediately if they were arabs or what is the nationality of the individuals involved.. this is not a matter of nationality, these are two neighbors not getting along and I believe that if they talked to each other as adults, they will be able to compromise to a solution. Which I think haven't taken place yet.
or Bah Humbug...?
What happened to the good old days when kids play on the streets and adults (with and without children)sit around and made sure that everyone is safe... and they all gang up on the grouchy neighbor Mr. Scrooge.... hey G.P.J.W. there will be three ghosts that will visit you come Christmas time.... hohohoho.. :P
Yes, kids DO play football in other compounds. Crazy that. :P
"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco
Thanks to everyone for their replies and different viewpoints. This issue has clearly provoked a lot of strong feeling – and that is from people who are not involved in it!
You know, “Jeremy” is right – there ARE different sides to every story and different perspectives which different people have, based on their background and the way they choose to live. That is obvious from the differing viewpoints expressed in the comments posted. He is also absolutely right that there are some people who will just never see eye to eye. In that case, it is probably best just to avoid one another – not to harass people and therefore inflame the situation.
This has never been about not wanting kids to exist or play in the compound – of course, kids should be encouraged to play and enjoy themselves. It is about respecting other people’s basic rights, including the right to be able to enjoy your own home and the right not to be harassed in your own home because you ask kids (and their parents) not to play football at and against your house and property when they can play in other parts of the compound.
It is very sad and distressing that the situation has reached this stage. From the comments that have been posted, it seems though that it is not an isolated incident and that it does occur in other compounds in Doha.
and I'd much rather see kids playing in the streets than wandering around outside ON the streets...that's when they get into trouble.
The kids all play football and street hockey on my compound, doesn't bother me in the least. Sounds like someones overreacting.
"You don't have to like me for who I am but we'll see what you're made of by what you make of me." Ani Difranco
shut up in a room left with electronic babysitters??? No wonder..ahh nevermind...absolutely huge difference in child rearing abilities between us then.(main one being I've raised two grown men already)
Children need the ability to exercise, and if its kicking a soccer ball around with their friends, then let them. Exercise is much better for them mentally AND physically. And, as far as I know, not many children adhere to the rule that they play only on weekends. I'm not an advocate for letting your children run wild, they need to be supervised for their own safety and be raised well behaved enough not to infringe upon other's rights. This isn't a matter of a small child but one that is well behaved and older. Funny thing is, we haven't heard the entire story from GPJW.
There is a WHOLE different story to the one that was posted..and its been from several sources, not just one. So, give the odds, I'd say the original poster has issues that aren't being reveiled to us on here at QL, for whatever reason. Still stick my original statement...best way to solve any issue is to talk...calmly and rationally and if that isn't possible, then get the management involved and all 3 of you sit down and discuss.
Getting hot awful quick? I think Bridget was just asking...
Bridget - My comment was in response to the one asking which villa - obviously the ones posted since, were posted while I was typing. I take it all back - the thread has gone crazy again. Will get off my friends log on and go back to my happy life of not reading this CRAP that people post. People have way too much spare time on their hands.
Knoxcollege -I disagree - The compound streets ARE for kids!!! In this country where parks are not easily accessible and the compounds don't provide them, then the kids should be out in the fresh air riding their bikes, kicking a soccer ball and NOT in front of the computer or the TV. Our compound thank goodness is NORMAL and the kids play happily out in the streets and the GROWN UPS drive carefully. Obviously there are some compounds where the people driving the cars are not grown ups at all. If you don't have kids - don't expect the kids not to exist. Your choice not to have kids.
I have wasted enough time on this. No more.
what do you mean? by Thank goodness there are some people who read this who have common sense - pleased to see the turn around in comments.
but doesn't have huge villas. Not sure which one you are thinking about but the villas are tiny and the streets are also tiny. They do have a tennis court and pool but nothing much else. I don't know if they are all Western Expats as I don't live there.
Thank goodness there are some people who read this who have common sense - pleased to see the turn around in comments.
When you get involve with authority here, they will not let you know if they do really take your side. instead you will get a surprised result like what happen to our friend. they had friend who has CID connection too. but you never know your luck! it's a matter of who has the stronger connection or wasta. if you assumed you have the right connection you'll never know what the other people has got. better to avoid problem when it comes to police business. have this motto always better to be safe than sorry! for sure you'll be safe.
i checked with my CID friend. He said he can help you out for sure. dont worry.
be very careful. those people we knew who complains about kids in the other compound was kicked out of the country by the authority itself. This is Middle East an Arab country and children are more precious to them than any adults. And that is the truth.
as I believe that streets are not for kids to play, rather to park cars.
And if you dont have the time with your busy schedule to take your kids out in a playground than DONT HAVE KIDS.
Many mothers will not agree with me even my mom doesnt agree with me on this.
Kids want to play but the parents dont have the resources/time to take them to a play ground so what other options do they have?
Buy them a play station or an xbox and they will spend all day playing in their rooms. Why should the others suffer if you do not have time. Its a different story if the children only play on weekends.
this is how simple it is. you make enemies with children, then you made yourself a lifetime enemies. no matter what, people cannot keep an eye of their children 24 hours a day. if you wish not to be bother by children move somewhere else, where there's no children around. some couples without children where we are, are aggressive with the children in my observation.
is that the compound with a tennis court and huge villas with all western expats (near villagio)?
I've heard from people from that same complex, that what was posted on here was NOT what happened..interesting how you can get two totally different stories...
For the original thread poster...GPJW, if you don't have children and don't particularly care for them, then move somewhere that doesn't allow anyone but adults. Try and talk matters out...not go off the deep end and become irrational.
I have NEVER been on Qatar Living until I heard about this thread and am very surprised to hear that people are very willing to give advice when only knowing one side of this story. I know some of the people involved (which is why I knew it was on QL) and this all appears to have started from 14 year old boys kicking a football around in the streets of their compound. There are no grassed areas or play areas in their compound and they are kids wanting to get out in the fresh air. Yes, they are all western and all nice boys from what I can see. They come from families who discipline their children and won't allow them to run riot in the streets of Doha. It appears that the couple who put this thread on this site simply have a problem with children in the compound existing. They appear not to have children themsleves and one wonders why someone would move into a compound when one has issues with boys kicking a football outside! I am not taking sides as I don't know all the exact details (and lets face it - no one knows all the exact details as people start to exaggerate and bend the truth when these things get out of hand) but suggesting that people going to the police is just going to make the problem worse. What we have are 2 groups of people who don't see eye to eye and probably never will - not everyone gets on in life. Compound living is hard enough without stirring the pot. I don't condone the egg throwing (if it actually occured) and know that one of the boys involved has now been banned from attending that compound in the future. But the people who got annoyed from a few kids playing outside their house may have over reacted in the early stages and then the situation has escalated since then. Everyone needs to calm down and get on with their lives. Life is too short to spend your day taking photos of your neighbours kids and sending a 10 page letter to the compound manager!!! I think that the kids should move to another part of the compound or another compound when they want to play ball. But in the same breath the lady with 4 cats who has issues with kids palying in the same street as her villa, appers to have too much time on her hands, and should refocus her life on something positive and not negative. I can't believe people have time in their life for this!!!!!
Geeze that sux...
I wish we could choose our neighbors...
If youhave no kids you need to move asap.
If you do...move anyway...
Thats what I would do...
Sorry to hear yoursituation...
I would be freakingout and prob get depoted for kicking that dads azz...
Stay cool and move...
You can't teach experience...
I just think that when things are that bad with your neighbours, the best approach that almost always works is to try to restore a good relationship. GOing to the police and keep complaining to managmnet will surely make matters worse, I doubt it will get them out of their villa at all.
Sometimes is just best to knock on their door with a pie and a white flag and just work things out amicably. Besides, I always think there are two sides of every story.
again.
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"There's this thing called being so open-minded your brains drop out". - Richard Dawkins
idea sounds good. Ask the owner to build it on the nearest main road.
Seriously, if you can capture it on video and then ask to see the owner or the police to get it sorted out.
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You've got to be joking!
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"There's this thing called being so open-minded your brains drop out". - Richard Dawkins
Why are we always asking if there are Arabs? they are westeners guys c'mon..[img_assist|nid=47306|title=He who has not Christmas in his heart will never find it under a tree. ~Roy L. Smith|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]
Where they arabs?
What to do? Sounds so diificult huh?
one go near their home and start screaming names just pretending as if you are calling some one make sure you know its when they are sleeping.
Or get ur car around and start honking and if they say anything say you were trying to call some one or get ur cell phone go near their home and scream on the phone loudly as if the person at other end cant hear you clearly :D
or rest call me will come with my band :D
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It is not a fun. They can get arrested and stay inside a government hotel with free food until somebody influacial get them out :)
File the complaint as suggested and do your best to not add any fuel to the fire because they are clearly irrational. Ignore as best you can and hopefully the authorities can sort it out. Not a fun spot to be in.
No need the names. House nos will be sufficient.
thats right/. GO to the Capital Police and make an official complaint.
If you can get hold of some of the names of the parents
put them also in your complaint.
call super nanny!!!!
Do you know where they work? If they are housed there by their company, then it might be best to contact them( the company) directly. Many organisations do not like the employees giving them a poor reputation.
The devil, Xena is the reluctant evil and Oryx is the maestro :D
To answer some questions...
No they are not Arab... they are western expats.
And I agree with Orxy who said there is a difference between fun and harassment. We've always acknowledged that children should be able to play and that we don't want to spoil their fun. However they chose to ignore our concerns and then ESCALATE the annoyance, which then became harassment.
We should not have to put up with abuse in the street and our home!
ok abc i wasn't going to say that but ehhhhhhhhh yes.
LOL
Kellys H is right buy a bloody dog.
the attack dog thing... I am after all a dog trainer....hehehe... have the perfect dog too....;-)
nah... not a solution.... seriously.... go to the cops....
With Xena and Ram. Go to the Police office and file a case.
Alternatively, get a nice attack dog and set him free around your place.
There is a law for harresment .. open a case up and they should do something ..
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"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."
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Go to the Central Security Division and lodge a complain to the officer there . He speeks good English and he will get them (PM me for his name)
Yes
I think there is a bit of difference betwee 'fun' and 'harrassment'.
Too many places are built with out a 'child friendly' area. That is an area where they can play without disturbing others and where it is safe for them to play..
I, and others, have had kids screeching around outside bedroom windows at 11pm. I tried to speak to the parents but it was basically 'what can i do - they are children'. 4 year olds should not be screeching around at 11pm.
And children are like pets... if you can't look after them properly - Dont have them!
then take it to the authorities, and open up a case of harrassement... I know its not what the ideal end would be..but if no one is able to do anything about it... then the authorities should be called in...
people do you have kids?
let them at list have fun during winter !!!
they are for more than 7 months closed under roofs because of wether !
but make it space for them to play!
try to manage between all of you in compound to bay some slides, jumping balloons... so all of them will be playing in one place!
if they are arabs its mean that they are noisy ?
maybe you should return their rude behaviour with kidness and being extra polite and helpful...maybe if you are nice with the children and their parents they will be more respectful with your needs.
It doesn't matter which nationality harassement is harassement, the only thing I can think of is to lodge a complaint to the police or the owner of the compound.
You meant impolite?
Unpollute will mean they are pure? Bedouins?
i think that you can speak with owner and ask to make playing ground for kids or manage between people live in compound to make somewhere part for them to play!
I feel pity...want sum gang or hitmans to sort out?? ;)
Are they arabs or some other nationality?