Miss Mimi: I understand what you mean, that’s why I said “conditions change and people’s responses change accordingly “.
Of course if the elder’s situation required special medical/health/mental attention, which I could not afford to provide for them at home, then a good “within proximity” nursing home would be the second best option.

As I understand it, you did/gave the best you could given the circumstances.
It also sounds as if you were a wonderful family, caring for your elders needs in a very special way.