been following this thread for the past couple of days. i was sorely tempted to be on the defensive and say, 'no, not all f's are like that, don't generalize, blah blah blah.' but i know it won't help because some people's minds are set.
ReDbutterfly, you have every right to be angry and hurt. it is your place to be so. YOU ARE THE WIFE. you are/will be the mother of his children. marriage, in whatever culture, is sacred. i don't know anything about you or the other parties involved to assume that you've made mistakes in your relationship with your husband that led him to do that, or he's simply a jerk the way many men are. i'm not married so i don't know anything but i am simply amazed at how some wives (at least the ones i know) can accurately sense if their husbands are trying/intending/actually cheating on them even in the most seemingly improbable cases. it's like there's a radar installed.
there are many reasons for infidelity. i don't know if the other girl is simply easy, really lonely or if she was desperate enough to do that to get a job because her visa might be expiring or whatever and she doesn't want to go home empty-handed after getting into debt just so she could pay her ticket and visa to come here. whatever it is, be thankful you are not in her position. in the eyes of the world and of God, what she did can never be right. like what some people have said, the best you can do is raise a daughter that can never be this kind of woman. or a son that will not be tempted by someone like this. as long as you do not do anything wrong, you can hold your head high in front of anyone.
on your husband's part, maybe his explanation is simply what it is. he wants to prove he is man enough. or maybe he wants to 'taste' something else. or maybe it's a power trip too. he was in some sort of position to decide on a person's fate and took advantage of that to his benefit. or he wanted to do something that he wouldn't dare do to you because he respects you. but whatever his reason is, it doesn't make it right. you should be able to reflect and think back on his reasons or what went wrong because you know him better than anyone here. it is also in your hands if you decide to forgive him or not.
been following this thread for the past couple of days. i was sorely tempted to be on the defensive and say, 'no, not all f's are like that, don't generalize, blah blah blah.' but i know it won't help because some people's minds are set.
ReDbutterfly, you have every right to be angry and hurt. it is your place to be so. YOU ARE THE WIFE. you are/will be the mother of his children. marriage, in whatever culture, is sacred. i don't know anything about you or the other parties involved to assume that you've made mistakes in your relationship with your husband that led him to do that, or he's simply a jerk the way many men are. i'm not married so i don't know anything but i am simply amazed at how some wives (at least the ones i know) can accurately sense if their husbands are trying/intending/actually cheating on them even in the most seemingly improbable cases. it's like there's a radar installed.
there are many reasons for infidelity. i don't know if the other girl is simply easy, really lonely or if she was desperate enough to do that to get a job because her visa might be expiring or whatever and she doesn't want to go home empty-handed after getting into debt just so she could pay her ticket and visa to come here. whatever it is, be thankful you are not in her position. in the eyes of the world and of God, what she did can never be right. like what some people have said, the best you can do is raise a daughter that can never be this kind of woman. or a son that will not be tempted by someone like this. as long as you do not do anything wrong, you can hold your head high in front of anyone.
on your husband's part, maybe his explanation is simply what it is. he wants to prove he is man enough. or maybe he wants to 'taste' something else. or maybe it's a power trip too. he was in some sort of position to decide on a person's fate and took advantage of that to his benefit. or he wanted to do something that he wouldn't dare do to you because he respects you. but whatever his reason is, it doesn't make it right. you should be able to reflect and think back on his reasons or what went wrong because you know him better than anyone here. it is also in your hands if you decide to forgive him or not.