Weekend is over & here I am. A friend has asked for a boy's side of story ....... fine here it is .....
1. First thing we need to keep in mind is the boy has started out this relationship with the false statements so that he doesnt lose this girl. He hid his education & said he is an Engineer whereas later on the girl found out just a month before their marriage that he is matric (10th standard pass). He hid his 11/12 years of childless marriage, which she found out only when after a lot of suffering & wait she spoke to his father. To till date he isnt sorry for hiding these two important things from her & bluntly says that I told you whereas he didnt.
2. He didnt want to marry her at first just wanted to time pass whereas the girl trusted him blindly & whatever he said she believed in him. He said to her that I spoke to my father about you & he is very happy with this proposal but because now they are going to their native country so the decision would be taken only when he comes back. The girl believed her & repeated the same story to her parents so they do not get her engaged to someone else. After his father's arrival, girl again asked him then he started to fight with her so that the case remains pending for some time but again later after a month when everything was alright between them he gave new excuse that all marriage decisions are taken by mom & she would be back by 6 months. Girl said the same story to the parents of hers. Later when both his mom & dad were together in Qatar, she spoke to him again & he started fighting with her by saying that she doesnt believe him that's why she is asking again n again about his parents & everytime after the fight he said to her that he is not going to marry her go n ask ur parents to find another person for you. Unfortunately her email addresses with passwords were always with him, even if she didnt give him he would hack those & get by himself & wherever she made her id like matrimonial sites & managed to get someone decent he would always add that guy thru fake id of his of female & would say to him that this girl has 15 boy friends & she is already divorced after a year's marriage etc etc. All bullshit he would say about her so that she doesnt get anyone proper for herself.
3. When the girl found about his first marriage from his father after talking to him directly she was shocked & after hearing about all the watta satta marriage that boy & his sister had in one family, she left him & for 6 months she didnt speak to him. SHe changed her email id, she changed her mobile number & then the boy started to park his car at a distance from her home from where he could see her movements. At that time, the girl was not working anywhere so she was doing pick & drop for her bro & sis & he always used to follow her & tried to stop her so that he could talk to her. At few times he found her alone & started crying on her shoulder that everything is going against him & she also left him etc etc. After his numerous attempts, the girl who was engaged to someone in those 6 months thru her family, she finally told him that okay she would accept him if he promises to mend his ways by keeping away from other girlfriends, by leaving all the stupid things & hacking stuff & by starting everything from scratch as new & she would help him in becoming a better person & clearly told him that they would not meet like before, he has to send his family with formal proposal respectfully to her family & they only she would marry him.
4. At this time, she contacted her father & told him about the whole story of what his son is doing with her but father instead of helping or asking his son to stop all this nonsense, started saying her that he is a blackmark in our family & he doesnt listen to anyone of us. So you try to marry someone as soon as possible. He also said to her that if my son asks you to marry him then simply tell him to send your parents. The girl promised him without his & hers family's approval this marriage is not going to take place.
5. After lots of ups & downs, they both finally did their nikah. After nikah, the girl started to look for separate accomodation for them whereas this was the responsibility of the boy but she didnt want this to take further & wanted to share his responsibilities. She spent around 15k in getting that home furnished. This time his family started creating drama that they are not going to attend wedding ceremony. The girl & her family were shocked without them ppl would start pointing finger at them & after huge convincing finally 2/3 members of his family came as guests to their wedding party.
6. After the party, when they went to their home, her husband slept as soon as both their families left. She was surprised about this but she didnt wake him up. She tried to convince herself that he must be tired. Her intention was only to talk to him & make him understand that she would help him in making this marriage successful & would try to be friends with his first wife so that she doesnt feel left out.
7. Next day, he started fighting with her. Which kept going on almost everyday. She took week's holiday from office to spend time with her but he didnt take even a day's leave. The girl felt bad but didnt say anything to him. She used to visit her in laws almost twice in a day which is an hour drive from her home, by spending time with them, by doing all sorts of jobs for his family like taking his sister to hospital appointments, taking his mom n sister in law for shopping etc etc she finally won all their hearts. But instead of becoming happy he started becoming jealous & started saying things now my family likes you what about ur family do they like me? She used to say him I have done a very hard work to make a place in their heart, for you, you too have to do the same thing but instead he started saying to her that you should not meet ur parents, you should not meet ur sister's husband but you can let ur brothers & their wives come to our home. He started saying all the bullshit about her mother & sister as someone would think of prostitutes & when she fought for her self respect he used to say her that you do not listen to your husband so you are not a good wife. He wanted her to listen to all his bullshit & say nothing like his first wife but here clearly was the difference she didnt surrender & said she would listen to all his proper demands but if he has a bad eye on her family, she would talk to his parents about this.
8. Whenever, to till date, she takes him anywhere he starts insulting her infront of other ppl, wherever she keeps quiet & doesnt talk to him & later when they reach home she tries to make him understand whatever he did in front of other ppl was wrong & this would let ppl talk about their newly wed life but he never understood & instead lectures her that she should listen to him always because 'husband is always right'.
These are some of the few important points that I remembered & narrated now you have to help her in taking a decision.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
CONFUSE ............ if you cannot convince! <
Weekend is over & here I am. A friend has asked for a boy's side of story ....... fine here it is .....
1. First thing we need to keep in mind is the boy has started out this relationship with the false statements so that he doesnt lose this girl. He hid his education & said he is an Engineer whereas later on the girl found out just a month before their marriage that he is matric (10th standard pass). He hid his 11/12 years of childless marriage, which she found out only when after a lot of suffering & wait she spoke to his father. To till date he isnt sorry for hiding these two important things from her & bluntly says that I told you whereas he didnt.
2. He didnt want to marry her at first just wanted to time pass whereas the girl trusted him blindly & whatever he said she believed in him. He said to her that I spoke to my father about you & he is very happy with this proposal but because now they are going to their native country so the decision would be taken only when he comes back. The girl believed her & repeated the same story to her parents so they do not get her engaged to someone else. After his father's arrival, girl again asked him then he started to fight with her so that the case remains pending for some time but again later after a month when everything was alright between them he gave new excuse that all marriage decisions are taken by mom & she would be back by 6 months. Girl said the same story to the parents of hers. Later when both his mom & dad were together in Qatar, she spoke to him again & he started fighting with her by saying that she doesnt believe him that's why she is asking again n again about his parents & everytime after the fight he said to her that he is not going to marry her go n ask ur parents to find another person for you. Unfortunately her email addresses with passwords were always with him, even if she didnt give him he would hack those & get by himself & wherever she made her id like matrimonial sites & managed to get someone decent he would always add that guy thru fake id of his of female & would say to him that this girl has 15 boy friends & she is already divorced after a year's marriage etc etc. All bullshit he would say about her so that she doesnt get anyone proper for herself.
3. When the girl found about his first marriage from his father after talking to him directly she was shocked & after hearing about all the watta satta marriage that boy & his sister had in one family, she left him & for 6 months she didnt speak to him. SHe changed her email id, she changed her mobile number & then the boy started to park his car at a distance from her home from where he could see her movements. At that time, the girl was not working anywhere so she was doing pick & drop for her bro & sis & he always used to follow her & tried to stop her so that he could talk to her. At few times he found her alone & started crying on her shoulder that everything is going against him & she also left him etc etc. After his numerous attempts, the girl who was engaged to someone in those 6 months thru her family, she finally told him that okay she would accept him if he promises to mend his ways by keeping away from other girlfriends, by leaving all the stupid things & hacking stuff & by starting everything from scratch as new & she would help him in becoming a better person & clearly told him that they would not meet like before, he has to send his family with formal proposal respectfully to her family & they only she would marry him.
4. At this time, she contacted her father & told him about the whole story of what his son is doing with her but father instead of helping or asking his son to stop all this nonsense, started saying her that he is a blackmark in our family & he doesnt listen to anyone of us. So you try to marry someone as soon as possible. He also said to her that if my son asks you to marry him then simply tell him to send your parents. The girl promised him without his & hers family's approval this marriage is not going to take place.
5. After lots of ups & downs, they both finally did their nikah. After nikah, the girl started to look for separate accomodation for them whereas this was the responsibility of the boy but she didnt want this to take further & wanted to share his responsibilities. She spent around 15k in getting that home furnished. This time his family started creating drama that they are not going to attend wedding ceremony. The girl & her family were shocked without them ppl would start pointing finger at them & after huge convincing finally 2/3 members of his family came as guests to their wedding party.
6. After the party, when they went to their home, her husband slept as soon as both their families left. She was surprised about this but she didnt wake him up. She tried to convince herself that he must be tired. Her intention was only to talk to him & make him understand that she would help him in making this marriage successful & would try to be friends with his first wife so that she doesnt feel left out.
7. Next day, he started fighting with her. Which kept going on almost everyday. She took week's holiday from office to spend time with her but he didnt take even a day's leave. The girl felt bad but didnt say anything to him. She used to visit her in laws almost twice in a day which is an hour drive from her home, by spending time with them, by doing all sorts of jobs for his family like taking his sister to hospital appointments, taking his mom n sister in law for shopping etc etc she finally won all their hearts. But instead of becoming happy he started becoming jealous & started saying things now my family likes you what about ur family do they like me? She used to say him I have done a very hard work to make a place in their heart, for you, you too have to do the same thing but instead he started saying to her that you should not meet ur parents, you should not meet ur sister's husband but you can let ur brothers & their wives come to our home. He started saying all the bullshit about her mother & sister as someone would think of prostitutes & when she fought for her self respect he used to say her that you do not listen to your husband so you are not a good wife. He wanted her to listen to all his bullshit & say nothing like his first wife but here clearly was the difference she didnt surrender & said she would listen to all his proper demands but if he has a bad eye on her family, she would talk to his parents about this.
8. Whenever, to till date, she takes him anywhere he starts insulting her infront of other ppl, wherever she keeps quiet & doesnt talk to him & later when they reach home she tries to make him understand whatever he did in front of other ppl was wrong & this would let ppl talk about their newly wed life but he never understood & instead lectures her that she should listen to him always because 'husband is always right'.
These are some of the few important points that I remembered & narrated now you have to help her in taking a decision.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
CONFUSE ............ if you cannot convince!
<