are PMing for some more, here's one... :)
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A rather attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet rural pub. She
gestures alluringly to the barman who comes over immediately. When he
arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face close to
hers. When he does so, she begins to gently caress his beard which is
full and bushy.

"Are you the manager?" she asks, softly stroking his face with both
hands.

"Actually, no" he replies.

"Can you get him for me? I need to speak to him" she says, running her
hands up beyond his beard and into his hair.

"I'm afraid I can't," breathes the barman - clearly in trouble. "Is there anything I can do?"

"Yes there is... I need you to give him a message," she continues
huskily, popping a couple of fingers into his mouth and allowing him to
suck them gently. "Tell him that there is no toilet paper in the ladies
room."

~ your thoughts create your reality ~