Relationship problem

traehslegna
By traehslegna

If you didn't heard any proposal from your boyfriend about marriage, how will you look at it? When your discussing to him about what you want on your weeding in time for the both of you and his reaction is like ignoring you and telling you i have a lot of responsibility to my family what will you do?

 

Can you please give me advice?

By princess habibah• 22 Apr 2008 01:13
Rating: 4/5
princess habibah

Such a shame any  man can treat a women like crap. He claims to love you and then takes off at the first sight of another girl.

 

personally I think that is sick and twisted because those guys are just liars who feel women can be walked all over. With no regard for her feelings.

 

Rather they should be honest with us from the beginning. And stick to their promises in the best possible way.

 

To the OP:

 

Make sure you crack on with your life sister. And don't base your future on the hopes this guy will settle down until he consolidates his feelings for you in a proposal.

 

 

Maryum : Umm Hasan bint Abdullah Alshabrawishi

By dreamandsmile• 21 Apr 2008 23:51
Rating: 5/5
dreamandsmile

I honestly don't see any problem here.  My advise to you is just simply enjoy what you have.  As long as he loves and respects you, then there's nothing to worry.  In due time, it will just happen.  Don't rush things or else you might regret it at the end.  The more time you get to know him the better. 

By lshy34• 17 Apr 2008 14:57
lshy34

 

Better ask about the plans.. 4 years is enough to settle down...  But if no any plans at all then, when?? think about yourself....

 

"Crazy World"

By Gumby• 10 Apr 2008 23:16
Gumby

Bring up the topic and ask him.

By deedee• 10 Apr 2008 20:34
deedee

And you will probably lose her as a friend if you push her too hard.   Some girls would rather cling to a jerk than be alone.   

By King Edshel• 17 Feb 2008 23:48
Rating: 3/5
King Edshel

is quiet long time fro both of you and more than enough to know what would happen. If after 4 years he is still ignoring you and saying nothing about marriage then what do you expect next? Well ...

I did not complete a year yet, but if i got the chance to marry that lady that i love i will marry her now!!! but sigh ... it is really complicated and not that easy at all ...

Breaking up with him is not the solution, asking him clearly after you sit with him what he wants from this relation would be the best. Don't waste your time more than that if he won't be able to answer that question of yours. It is a good and nice thing to help your family, but not to ignore someone who really loves you and stayed with you for four years ...

 

------------------------------------

Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment. (Gautama Buddha)

By DaRuDe• 13 Feb 2008 12:22
DaRuDe

 

 oh you can gift her some company shares and trade them in DSM :D hmm valentine day's gift

[img_assist|nid=73057|title=.|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]

By traehslegna• 13 Feb 2008 12:19
traehslegna

Thank you guys for your advice to my bestfriend, i hope we will wake her up. Thanks

By Gypsy• 13 Feb 2008 10:37
Gypsy

Hmmm.... I think the day I marry I'll put everything in his account.  I'm awful with money. 

 

"I am not a pretty girl, that is not what I do, I ain't no damsel in distress and I don't need to be rescued. So put me down punk, I'm not a maiden fair, maybe there's a kitten stuck up a tree somewhere." Ani Difranco

By anonymous• 13 Feb 2008 10:37
anonymous

 

 

My mother used to say "a watched kettle never boils", means no use in waiting to long and don't put off asking what are his intentions.

By anonymous• 13 Feb 2008 10:32
anonymous

"hmm the day we marriied he put everything into my account......."

 

What a FOOL!!!!!!

By qatarisun• 13 Feb 2008 10:26
Rating: 3/5
qatarisun

gals/Ladies who buys "expensive gifts" for their dear ones...

to be honest I come across with this matter only here in Qatar.. but it’s kind of understandable.. if the Lady has an “unearned” income of thousands of dollar weekly from the oil dividends, for her it’s peanuts some 7-8 thousand riyal a month to pay (or to help paying) a rent for the guy, or to put down payment (about a half price of the car) for some Land Cruiser or so…

hey smoke, why would you get the girl like that?  be sure, there are a lot of gals out there who can help you with your ferrari!!!

***********************

This Too Shall Pass.....

[img_assist|nid=71431|title=magic ring|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]

By spicemom• 13 Feb 2008 10:23
spicemom

hmm the day we marriied he put everything into my account..........

 

life's too short so make the most of it, you only live but once.......

By Gypsy• 13 Feb 2008 10:23
Gypsy

Didn't say they were, just saying there are scumbuckets everywhere.

 

 

"I am not a pretty girl, that is not what I do, I ain't no damsel in distress and I don't need to be rescued. So put me down punk, I'm not a maiden fair, maybe there's a kitten stuck up a tree somewhere." Ani Difranco

By SPEED• 13 Feb 2008 10:22
Rating: 4/5
SPEED

And i put US$20,000 in my wife's account before our marriage ... all men are not same ;p

 

[img_assist|nid=53652|title=|desc=|link=none|align=center|width=|height=0]

By retahnam• 13 Feb 2008 10:16
retahnam

"Only in Dreams never in reality"

 

ur bestfriend will be hurt and cry because she is sensitive....everybody when we are in desperate mood, we are senstive and we want to cry....but show her that you care about her and you are only simple but true friend of her  by reminding her that she is not in the right track...I knew how its hard for her to move out and move on its not a joke...but she needs to wake up from her dreams...she needs to face the reality, reality will hurt her but atleast  she will come to anayze and open her eyes that there are many fishes swimming in the ocean.........If her bf can not take the responsibility to be with her lifetime, she needs to look somebody who can take care of her. Relationship is take and give...

By dragonfly212• 13 Feb 2008 10:16
Rating: 4/5
dragonfly212

yes man think they can play with woman heart easily but once they got brokenheart it took them ages to recovery. while woman are more stronger and ready for any challange. Traeh, hope your best friend is like this.

 

Everybody is right and Everybody is wrong, its depend where you stand

By Gypsy• 13 Feb 2008 10:13
Rating: 2/5
Gypsy

I woudln't put myself $20 in debt for you Charan.  

"I am not a pretty girl, that is not what I do, I ain't no damsel in distress and I don't need to be rescued. So put me down punk, I'm not a maiden fair, maybe there's a kitten stuck up a tree somewhere." Ani Difranco

By spicemom• 13 Feb 2008 10:10
spicemom

ya cant do nothing for no one if they dont want to help themself in the first place , right??

 

life's too short so make the most of it, you only live but once.......

By anonymous• 13 Feb 2008 10:10
anonymous

Gypsy - Why don't you treat me like that :(

By owen• 13 Feb 2008 10:09
Rating: 2/5
owen

you are not at all helping your friend if you will this relationship continue....not unless "they" already have agreed into this situation that you are not aware of...

[img_assist|nid=12867|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood.

By Gypsy• 13 Feb 2008 10:08
Gypsy

There are men like this everywhere. I was with my ex finacee for 6 years and he put me over 20, 000 $ in debt before he left me for another girl 6 months before the wedding. 

 

"I am not a pretty girl, that is not what I do, I ain't no damsel in distress and I don't need to be rescued. So put me down punk, I'm not a maiden fair, maybe there's a kitten stuck up a tree somewhere." Ani Difranco

By qatarisun• 13 Feb 2008 10:07
Rating: 5/5
qatarisun

you cannot wake her up... it's up to her either to wait forever or to move on.. but to be honest i think t his guy will never marry her...4 years is kindda enough to know the person, and to understand whether you want to marry this person or not... so either that guy doesn't want to marry this particular girl, and just wait till he meet someone else, or he is scared of marriage in general, and the idea of signing some papers is killing him... both scenarios are not good for her…

I know soo many different cases of this scenario…one guy was living with the girl for 7 years, and finally they broke up as he “was not ready”… now he is dreaming to get her back.. but it’s too late.  Other couple was dating for about 7 years, till she insisted on marriage, and they got married. In half a year they got divorced. One couple is still in the “process”.. They are together for 7 years, and no “Happy End” is seen in the near future… very hard to predict…

so again it’s entirely up to her to wait or to move on...

 

***********************

This Too Shall Pass.....

[img_assist|nid=71431|title=magic ring|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]

By retahnam• 13 Feb 2008 10:06
Rating: 4/5
retahnam

"Only in Dreams never in reality"

 

sometimes,  we need also to understand your bestfriend, she loves him maybe....that is the weakness of ladies, they are strict to choose but wen they fall in love they can not control the emotion.....i believed that your bestfriend is giving him money also...and maybe buying him material things..and she can buy him car also (i knew 2 friends of mine did that to their bf) . I was shocked..They avail of car loan only for their bf. And this bf, going around very boastful that he bought the car and he owns company....

this picture is 40% in Doha, Qatar. I don't know why there are man like this.

 

I knew also if you try to advise and fight with your bestfriend about this, she will get angry at you and tell "Do not say bad things about my bf because i love him."  But if she is your bestfriend, fight for her, always remind her that she is abusing herself....that if she loves his bf she needs to teach him how to be a man

By dragonfly212• 13 Feb 2008 10:05
dragonfly212

I can be the messanger DrD... LOL

 

Everybody is right and Everybody is wrong, its depend where you stand

By spicemom• 13 Feb 2008 10:03
spicemom

nah he just wants to have the cake and eat it as well....lol  

 

life's too short so make the most of it, you only live but once.......

By diamond• 13 Feb 2008 10:02
Rating: 3/5
diamond

He's playing her, honey. 

 

[img_assist|nid=57389|title=|desc=peace|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0] _______________________________________________________ Love is the answer...

By Gypsy• 13 Feb 2008 10:01
Rating: 4/5
Gypsy

Nah sounds like he's giving her the run around, if they were 22 or 23, even if he was 25 I'd say maybe he's just not ready, but at 27 he should be ready or at least thinking about it.  Is she helping him finacially now?  Cause if she is he probably just doesn't want to lose her paycheck (until another comes along).

 

 

"I am not a pretty girl, that is not what I do, I ain't no damsel in distress and I don't need to be rescued. So put me down punk, I'm not a maiden fair, maybe there's a kitten stuck up a tree somewhere." Ani Difranco

By DaRuDe• 13 Feb 2008 10:00
DaRuDe

 so i can submit my application right :D

[img_assist|nid=73057|title=.|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]

By owen• 13 Feb 2008 09:59
owen

4 years?????....did she ever tried breaking up with the guy?...if she hasn't, then let her break up with him....she will see from there if the guy is really serious with the relationship or he is just using her (according to your statement that she is helping him with his family responsibility)...

 this is quite unfair for her....

 

[img_assist|nid=12867|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood.

By dragonfly212• 13 Feb 2008 09:59
dragonfly212

try to get another groom. and send the invitation to him. that will teach him in hard way. guarranty.

 

Everybody is right and Everybody is wrong, its depend where you stand

By traehslegna• 13 Feb 2008 09:58
traehslegna

well, gypsy they are both turning 27 so isnt it right age to settle knowing that my friend help him for his responsibility?

By traehslegna• 13 Feb 2008 09:57
traehslegna

rethanman, if i will tell her the same way of what you've said i'm sure i will make her cry.

 

What you said id right but how can i tell her? shes sensitive

By Gypsy• 13 Feb 2008 09:54
Rating: 2/5
Gypsy

How old are they?  If they're young he might just not be ready, but if they aren't it just sounds like he has no intentions of getting married.

 

 

"I am not a pretty girl, that is not what I do, I ain't no damsel in distress and I don't need to be rescued. So put me down punk, I'm not a maiden fair, maybe there's a kitten stuck up a tree somewhere." Ani Difranco

By traehslegna• 13 Feb 2008 09:52
traehslegna

actually this situation is not for me for my bestfriend, i dont know how will i wake her up.

 

actually she's helping the guy on his responsibility. She doesnt deseve this kind of treatment. She's nice person

By retahnam• 13 Feb 2008 09:43
retahnam

"Only in Dreams never in reality"

 

in addition to that, what you will feel if your boyfriend will tell to you "oh my..?? you are expecting that i will marry you?"""  or  "you know what? I am not going to marry"  or  "someday you will find a good husband for you" or etc etc..... Maybe these words are only some examples how to re-prase the term "I don't like you to be my wife"...... 

 

Try to talk to him considering your age that ....its time...ist time to settle down...He can always support his family even he is married with you right? But if you will control full his salary, that will be different topic...

 

Goodluck

By traehslegna• 13 Feb 2008 09:36
traehslegna

4 years long

By owen• 13 Feb 2008 09:32
Rating: 4/5
owen

traehslegna you got to give us more details before we conclude (advise) on your situation....:P

[img_assist|nid=12867|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood.

By spicemom• 13 Feb 2008 09:31
Rating: 4/5
spicemom

some one once told me that the sky's the limit and that there is lot of fish in the sea>winks

 

 

life's too short so make the most of it, you only live but once.......

By anonymous• 13 Feb 2008 09:29
anonymous

Find an another one

By spicemom• 13 Feb 2008 09:28
spicemom

lol dont we all sound like Dear Abby or DR Phil.......hehehehhehhehhe

 

life's too short so make the most of it, you only live but once.......

By owen• 13 Feb 2008 09:27
Rating: 5/5
owen

quite frankly, you have to sit down with him and ask him blatantly if he does have plans with you in the future...btw, how long have you been in relationship? before i continue on...

[img_assist|nid=12867|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]Nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood.

By DaRuDe• 13 Feb 2008 09:27
DaRuDe

 just quit him simple

 

[img_assist|nid=73057|title=.|desc=|link=none|align=left|width=|height=0]

By spicemom• 13 Feb 2008 09:26
Rating: 5/5
spicemom

cant basically tell you wat to do as each situation and individual is different. wat i can gather fr this is that he is not yet ready, so work fr there, ask yrself wat do you want now, a)stay and wait till he is ready or b)say thank you , good bye and move on(well this is only my opinion) 

life's too short so make the most of it, you only live but once.......

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