Men and their Cars - Bless them

Do you love your car so much that you could go to bed with it or invite it into your kitchen? If so, a team of Berlin architects has designed the ultimate living space for you and your machine: the drive-in apartment.

The idea is simple, yet also faintly disturbing. An elegant but heavy-duty lift — strong enough to hoist an armour-plated vehicle — lifts the limo directly to the loft-style apartment. It is parked in a kind of conservatory with only a large glass wall separating it from the living space.

Whenever you feel the need to stroke the bonnet of your Mercedes you simply slide back the wall — and bond.

“Cars have become design statements, an expression of your lifestyle,” says Johannes Kauka, the managing director of Topos, which is completing the pioneering apartment block in a run-down area of Berlin. “So why not integrate them properly into your life?” The effect is to make the car part of the interior decoration: a work of art that the proud owner can admire from his sofa.

The Berlin model is intended for export to cities that have problems with car theft — St Petersburg and Cape Town have shown interest — or with housing so close to floodable rivers that underground parking is impossible. If the project is a success it will be taken to Brussels, Mexico City and Abu Dhabi, where there are plans to construct car-lofts with space for several limos. They will be on rotating bases so that the Rolls-Royces and Ferraris can be spun gently, like records on a gramophone.

So far six of the eleven car-loft apartments in Berlin have been sold, including one to the chief designer of an international motor company. The smallest - 224 square metres - costs €468,000 (£373,000) while the sixth-floor penthouse costs €1.6 million.

Not a shocking amount by London standards, but locals in the Berlin-Kreuzberg district are outraged. “Smash the capitalists!” has been daubed on the scaffolding and there has already been one angry demonstration. But for someone who can afford a Bugatti (up to €1.5 million) or even a Ferrari (€200,000), the lofts are a snip. Each has a garden of 50 square metres, with an optional putting green. More importantly, the apartments also come with a pampering unit for the car: the bodywork can be washed, moisturised and given antiageing treatment in the comfort of your own home. Wherever you stand in the open-plan flat you can keep an eye on the vehicle.

“The customers all have a special relationship to cars,” Mr Kauka says. “They have petrol in their veins.”

Although the architects are selling the concept as a revolution in design, the real, er, driving force in sales is likely to be fear. The car-loft website (www.carloft.de) hints as much: “Afraid of you car being vandalised? Nervous about dark alleyways and gloomy underground car parks? Your worries are a thing of the past.”

The whole process of approaching the house, entering the apartment and parking the car takes two minutes. That is not only a time-saving device - think of the time and petrol expended in the search for a free parking space — but is also attractive to vulnerable VIPs.

“These are car fetishists; they're sick,” said Bernd Dressinger, wheeling his bicycle outside the block. “Still, at least you wouldn't have to carry up the beer crate.You could drive straight to the fridge.”

Driven to distraction

— A survey by Kwik-Fit found that 330,000 Britons were staying in a relationship so that they could continue to drive their car

— The same survey this year found that 40 per cent of men sized up prospective partners by the car they drove. Women were worse - 44 per cent admitted to judging men by their vehicle and 230,000 admitted to leaving a partner because their car was not up to scratch

— Last year the headman of Sivapuram village in southern India died and was buried with his car, in accordance with his wishes. A grave was dug with an excavator so that Narayanswami and his 1958 Morris Minor could rest in peace together

— A poll published in December 2006 found that almost 4 out of 10 Americans considered their car to have a personality of its own, while 23 per cent thought of their cars as female, compared with seven per cent who regarded them as male

— A survey by the AA this year found that 15 per cent of British men would rather give up drinking and holidays than lose their car. It said that 4 per cent would rather give up their pets and 3 per cent would prefer to resign from their jobs