I Hate My iPhone

the_tale_of_death
By the_tale_of_death

I just want to share that article with you guys.

"The iPhone was charging. Refined, introverted, mysteriously chilled, my new $200 tile of technology lay supine on a side table, gulping power from the wall.

Actually, the iPhone probably sips, like a lipsticky girl with a vodka drink. It usually does things in a cute way. Whatever. At 4 in the morning, I was in bed, fighting rage. I couldn’t stop thinking about that device’s tarty little face and those yapping “apps” you can download for it. The whole iPhone enterprise seemed to require so much attention, organization, explanation, praise, electricity. I know — I know: in the morning, Apple’s latest miracle machine would fill my palm with meaning and magic. So why couldn’t I contain my annoyance? I had no new-thing excitement. It dawned on me: I hated my iPhone.

I was late to get one — and maybe that’s the problem. Maybe my hopes for the iPhone curdled in the time it took for my perfectly good T-Mobile plan to expire so I could switch to balky AT&T and purchase one. But I had bided my time. And, really, my enthusiasm survived right up to the moment at the AT&T counter, post-sale, when a saleswoman transferred my address book from my battered BlackBerry to the sweetie-pie iPhone.

“Can you set up my e-mail too?” I asked. She handed me the phone and told me what to type. Pressing her good nature, I asked if she’d do that part too, since I wasn’t yet handy with the iPhone’s character-entry system — the 2D screen-based simulation of the qwerty keyboard.

She gave me a hard look. Truly, as if she was supposed to be on the lookout for people like me. “It’s your phone,” she replied briskly. “It’s time you started typing on it.”

It’s time. She was like a nurse for newborns, urging me — a new mother — to step up and change a diaper or something. And I felt just like a sullen new mom, not ready for her role. “Can you just do it this one time?” I said weakly. She poked in the necessary codes. She didn’t trust me, but she let me take the iPhone home anyway.

I didn’t trust myself, either. There were warning signs. I didn’t rush to explore the phone or load it up with apps. I didn’t fantasize about its features, as I did with the feedable Baby Alive doll when I was 6 or with my first Macintosh, when I was 19. Instead, the iPhone stayed in my bag. A hard weight with glossy surfaces, it kept aloof from the animal warmth of my leather wallet. I didn’t even face the iPhone again until it rang, or chimed — or produced some audio confection that seemed cloyingly churchy.

You can see I wasn’t thinking clearly. To answer the phone, I had to touch the screen. Years of not touching screens — so as not to smudge or scar — made me wary. But I brushed the “answer call” and up came fragments of my mother’s cheerful voice. AT&T no doubt works like a charm in other areas, but as I’d been warned, it wasn’t so hot on holding calls where I live. I let it drop my mom. I hunted for a keypad to call her back, but it was gone.

The morning after my sleepless night of charging the phone, a text message arrived from a colleague, about breakfast. It came up in a little dialogue bubble, as if we were characters in a comic book.

Now I had to reply. My throat tightened. “Running late,” I decided on. “See you in 15 min.”

What came out was this: “Runninlate. See you in 15 Mon.”

Why? Why, because of course that’s what I typed! What did I know of this wacko kind of typing? I spent my adolescence touch-typing, convinced my life would be passed secretarially, my left pinkie building novelty muscle manning the A. Then the technology changed, and I improvised an inelegant three-finger style for computer keyboards.

Then years ago, when I bought a BlackBerry, I adapted again. My two hands met as if in prayer, as the thick thumbs took center stage. I liked it. Thinking with my thumbs made sense in a way that thinking with nails and feebler fingers never would or did. And the transformation of thumb-twiddling into typing! Nervous motion was turned productive, as it is in knitting or whittling. Ingenious.

Oh, God. I really was losing it. As I composed my running-late text, the iPhone’s iciness deepened my revulsion. Did this device, which was built never to be cradled, ever warm up? I was also mortified by my illiteracy. My right index finger — the only digit precise enough to hit the close-set virtual iPhone keys — seemed an anemic, cerebral thing, designed for making paltry points in debating club. I repeatedly stabbed to the right of my target letter. It was like being 4 again — or being 90. I couldn’t see, it seemed; I couldn’t point; I couldn’t connect.

And so the iPhone made suggestions. Did I want to say Ride? Ripe? Ruin? No. I wanted to say Running. You know, the way a human might. But with its know-it-all suggestions, the iPhone seemed to want to be more human, more helpful, jollier than I was! The vaunted Apple user-friendliness was exposed, before my eyes, as bossiness and insincerity.

I refused to fight further with the smug phone. Off sailed my text — the work of a blithering idiot.

At breakfast, my colleague said she loved her iPhone. She insisted my typing would improve, but she clearly has more native index-finger skills than I do. I asked her if she thought the iPhone was “coy” or “cold,” and she looked at me blankly. As I spoke I felt like a chippy freak — one of those people too intransigently cranky even to like Barack Obama, or recycling, or the Internet. I thought of how clearly the iPhone suits the moment: Apple once again getting ahead of the game, offering something cuter and funner and more Appley than anyone else.

The failure to appreciate the iPhone was all mine. But I decided not to dwell on that. “I thought you might be back,” the AT&T saleswoman said as I walked in the door. “So?” I said. “You were right.” With some satisfaction, she took the iPhone, and I walked away with a new BlackBerry and money to spare.

Virginia Heffernan
The NY Times"

By master_mas• 6 Apr 2009 07:52
Rating: 4/5
master_mas

well, u can send the videos you shoot via bluetooth to other iPhones or to PCs.. because only they can play *.mov extention.. but not other mobile phones..

u can download youtube videos and send them to any other phone..

sending music is possible but huge headache..

By master_mas• 6 Apr 2009 07:25
Rating: 5/5
master_mas

HerculePirate said hey ...

Hey Mastar Mass...

If the stuff I mentioned can be done on a standard phone...

I am sold....

I will sell my 5800 right away and get the iPHONE

let me know

Regards

.

yes they r possible. u just need few softwares from here & there.. u can use the bluetooth like any other phone.. except u cannot send music or videos.. only contacts, pictures and notes..

By master_mas• 6 Apr 2009 07:22
Rating: 5/5
master_mas

it's the best touch screen i've ever used.. also the best acceleratometer ever.. it's even better than the PS3 six axis controller..

By shyams• 5 Apr 2009 20:45
shyams

thats not only about the touch, much more than that.. software support and application availability....

iphone platform is very popular to application developers... so u get more for less...

By mallrat• 5 Apr 2009 18:11
Rating: 3/5
mallrat

.i think iphone comes close to blackberry bold 9000 when it comes to the fastness of "your" touch, lol....

.

.

.

.

.

.that's all......

.

By shyams• 5 Apr 2009 17:56
Rating: 4/5
shyams

fellas if you are trying to unlock the iPhone and dont blame the beautiful iPhone... its a class in design and innovation...... magnificent design and technology.

i love my iPhone right from the day one and till date... best my money could buy and making the full utilization of it...

with iPhone i play games, browse internet, check mails, instant messenging, voip call (sip), music, read books, watch video, play around with programming. connect to computer and play with system files of iPhone....

come on fellas what else you want to do?? with a phone mere $600-$650?????

oh yes.. u can even make and receive CALLS in mobile....lol....

trust me no other phone either be LG cookie, sony or Nokia touch screen phones respond to the touch as fast as iPhone (havent tried Black berry Storm).

so spread love not hatred... lol..

By junarc2003• 5 Apr 2009 16:52
junarc2003

i hate my iphone right now..need to fix few things and i can't find time to visit any shop to fix it.. it's been in a safe mode for like 2 weeks now...

"there are so many rumors about me...feel free to believe in any of'em.."

By anonymous• 5 Apr 2009 16:43
anonymous

in my dreams. i have n95 but hopefully i could get an iphone. it's so cool when its touch screen like my laptop, nyaha!

"a step towards the right path is two steps away from evil"

By mallrat• 5 Apr 2009 15:20
mallrat

.hi DMS...

.

.well i can teach you something else,

.

.i used mine to call dead people, lol....

.

.

.

.

.

.that's all......

.

By fallenangel06• 5 Apr 2009 15:17
Rating: 4/5
fallenangel06

Lmao, Apple vs Windows. I love the iPhone, I hate the iPhone. Get a grip already it is just a piece of technology which will change or be replaced, in time everything does. It also depends on your personal needs/preference. Some will like it and some will not, so what....

By anonymous• 5 Apr 2009 15:06
anonymous

I just use it to call and send SMS! I don't know how to download? Please!

"dgoodrebel will always be the rebellious good one"

By mallrat• 5 Apr 2009 15:02
Rating: 2/5
mallrat

.

.

.just throw your 5800, lol.

.

.after all it is just an iphone's second rate,

trying- hard, copy cat

.

.

.

.that's all......

.

By HerculePirate• 5 Apr 2009 14:26
HerculePirate

Hey Mastar Mass...

If the stuff I mentioned can be done on a standard phone...

I am sold....

I will sell my 5800 right away and get the iPHONE

let me know

Regards

Alwyn

By Saurabh7• 5 Apr 2009 14:05
Saurabh7

see, you people just dont like the iphone cos u cant get it. So you are trying to convince your self that it sucks and you dont need it :P Get out of DENIAL!

By master_mas• 5 Apr 2009 13:04
master_mas

everything is possible u just need to look harder..

ask me anything about iPhone.. glad to answer..

By anonymous• 5 Apr 2009 13:03
anonymous

I wonder if Apple can survive this recession...

If it doesnt the guys with Apple products are screwed...lol

By master_mas• 5 Apr 2009 13:02
master_mas

HerculePirate said ... ...

Can you forward Text message???

Can you forward contacts using Blutooth???

Can you use the Blutooth to transfer data across to other phone or use as Modem???

.....

yes i can

yes i can

yes i can...

u wanna know how.. 150 QRs.. iPhone 3G and 2G..

even iPod Touch users can do that.

By Saurabh7• 5 Apr 2009 12:19
Rating: 3/5
Saurabh7

You are gonna let some one else tell you what to buy or not?

Btw gphone sucks....sucky camera, looks cheap

See, everything has its flaws. And you cant simply tell iPhone sucks. Everythin depends one ur need..if you just want to call, even a 1100 is enough.

Apple made the iPhone and they re now working on their flaws. C'mon! Can you people do something better?

Cheers!

By dragonfly212• 5 Apr 2009 11:50
dragonfly212

i agree with bill gates. i say no to iphone.

Everybody is right everybody is wrong, it depend where you stand

By Saurabh7• 5 Apr 2009 11:35
Saurabh7

@ Hercule...wait for ifone 3.0 firmware this June ;)

By BIT_WITS• 5 Apr 2009 11:01
Rating: 5/5
BIT_WITS

Guys

This is a Post for NY times.. which was copied on this page.. Nevertheless.. iphone users..Pls keep in mind that this is the sexiest phone.. ever to date..

I dont own on.. because i cant afford one as of now.. but i have a lot of friends who have iphone and dont know what are the things they can use it for..

I have configured so many of their requirements and user interests.. such as games.. apps and email applications, Voip softwares and so on.. Ohh Man i love the phone when some dumb rich friends of mine come over to me and say" hey need you to fix this and need you to load that" Oh Boys.. ishameless in admiring the beauty belonging to some one else and coming to me for a version upgrade..

Their latest outcome is mobile me- Configure it on your PC/Mac/iphone and its all there.. with out having to keep changing contacts through sim :)

In today's technology.. 4 Main requirements dominate the mobile fraternity

iInternet (Wifi & Emailing)

iGaming 3d (Add on Games)

iMusic ( Oh boy)

iPhone (to Stay connected to the other side)

iPhone has captured all the features and has cutting edge capabiltiy..the only think it lacks is a camera.. the new version how ever is coming up with a 3.2Mp or a 5Mp camera So...

iUseful and ifriendly :)

Regards

BitWits

By anonymous• 5 Apr 2009 10:58
Rating: 5/5
anonymous

the best is the nokia 5800 its the same with iphone''TO ERR IS HUMAN TO FORGIVE IS DIVINE''.('',)..

By HerculePirate• 5 Apr 2009 10:45
HerculePirate

Can you forward Text message???

Can you forward contacts using Blutooth???

Can you use the Blutooth to transfer data across to other phone or use as Modem???

By mallrat• 5 Apr 2009 10:28
mallrat

.

.it is so different from my nokia and imate.....

.

.im lovin it:(

.

.

.

.

.that's all......

.

By mallrat• 5 Apr 2009 10:27
mallrat

.im inlove with my iphone:(

.that's all......

.

By HerculePirate• 5 Apr 2009 10:25
Rating: 2/5
HerculePirate

I had the iPhone and in a week I gave it back ...that was the max i could handle the iPhone in my hands..\

pathetic....

Swore ...never to go for any APPLE products again.

Regards

HP

By HerculePirate• 5 Apr 2009 10:24
Rating: 3/5
HerculePirate

Sorry the most patheitc phone...

Why the hell do people need to chip and screw a phone to unlock its full potential..

The Gphone will kill the Iphone in time

By Saurabh7• 5 Apr 2009 10:17
Rating: 2/5
Saurabh7

Virginia should stop whining...we all loves iPhones

By maani• 5 Apr 2009 09:45
maani

I love my iphone..

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