being a "SLUT"

azilana7037
By azilana7037

When many people hear or see the word, they often think of a girl who sleeps around with everyone she meets.

"Slut" is a power insult. It is a direct attack upon someone's sexuality

What exactly is a slut? Who uses the term, and why? Who're you callin' a slut?

Historically, "slut" has been a derogatory term directed towards girls. Though some believe the word is used primarily by males, it is more commonly used by girls amongst themselves these days.

The exact characterization of what constitutes a "slut" varies from person to person; however, the "textbook" definition is along the lines of "a sexually immoral female." Of course, what exactly constitutes "immoral" is largely subjective. But, why it is even necessary to call someone a "slut?"

In its purest form, "slut" is often used to describe any female that is comfortable with her sexuality. A woman can have X number of boyfriends and be labeled a slut, but a woman can also have only one and be slapped with the same label – it is all in how one present herself.

If you are comfortable and confident with your sexuality, and don't take steps to hide that fact, you will often find yourself on the receiving end of a "slut" insult.

HOWEVER, when it came to the MENFOLKS, here's where the "double standard" comes in.

Guys who enjoy sex or have multiple partners are almost always looked upon with envy – they are "studs" or "players".

These terms, of course, do not evoke the same negativity that "slut" does. It is telling that there are less than a handful of negative monikers associated with a male who is sexually active, but there are over two dozen for girls who are perceived to be operating outside the bounds of acceptability when it comes to sex.

Of course, being a PRUDE can be just as bad for one's reputation.

What you are is what you have been, and what you will be is what you do now. - Buddha

By the black prince• 10 Oct 2007 13:58
Rating: 5/5
the black prince

The problem with the use of of the word Slut is the general problem we have in this world today. The wish of so many people to impose there morals, thought, opinoins on others and the lack of tolerance of others right to another opinion and way of life.

Strange is though that the use of the Slut by men is by most of us understandable if not acceptable, my ex is a Slut, she is a Slut because she wont sleep with me....the usual male ego problem, me Tarzan you Jane but what is this when woman call another woman a slut? I dont know if we have all noticed but this discussion got personal when womans opinion about other woman came into it.

Ladies, for the help of a poor man who wishes to understand the female gender better, whats up girls, why so agressive to each other and please dont say you werent, go read the messages.

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 10 Oct 2007 12:27
skdkak closed 1708224867

Good afternoon to all.

How are you all doing today. Nothing much moving here... i was going through some threads... one of them is real real HOT.. got to chk dat out

By Andrews• 10 Oct 2007 12:19
Andrews

I dont give any damn to that word......SLUT...........Iam searching for a real slut

By chunk03• 7 Oct 2007 08:22
Rating: 4/5
chunk03

Good mornming all,

Just reading every ones comments and views , everybodys seems to be to out spoken about the way other people go about their lives, why, is there life to sheltered and are they just jealous, i have now come to realise, and this is ONLY MY OPINION, if there is somthing i want to do, and it doesnt affect or hurt any1 in the process, then i will do it, life is to short, do what you want, and as long as you smile then who cares, be it with another person or by your self, if that then makes me a slut, then i can handle that...haha, take care all n enjoy the day...........

By azilana7037• 7 Oct 2007 07:44
Rating: 4/5
azilana7037

I'm just kidding when I said I'll stick to health topics ;-P

Still got some topics lined up...but I'll wait until I get my full internet access which is a couple of days from now.

Cheers!

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 6 Oct 2007 12:36
skdkak closed 1708224867

Why are you getting frustated. U can do better than that.. Let anyone say anything. U know best what you are and one should not try to prove anythiing of this sort to anyone.

Enjoy the crap some people write and pity on their thinking

By azilana7037• 6 Oct 2007 12:11
Rating: 4/5
azilana7037

The first time I read her comments...it made me laugh, because I really expect it to happen.

I don't mind IOU saying I'm a "slut", it's her opinion...she's entitled to it. I've been called a "pimp" and other much worse terms in some previous threads, but people and friends around me knows I'm NOT.

I think I'll stick to the health topics since people find my topics TABOO and IMMORAL ;-P

By azilana7037• 6 Oct 2007 11:58
azilana7037

It’s obvious and quite expected that sone one will start "again".

Do understand what the word meant as it clearly pertains to one’s sex lifestyle…

Better have your eyes checked…because as far as everyone in QL and I can remember, SOME PERSONALITIES posted my so-called personal experiences on sex (NOT ME)…and it would be so ludicrous for you to say you don’t know what I mean.

You said YOU DON’T KNOW ME and yet branded me as one because of the topics I make? Quite presumptuous, aren’t you?

Honey, QL is a public web forum where any and every topic under the sun can be discussed and argued about as long as no guidelines are broken. As far as I know, I haven't broken any, in this topic or any topics I previously started.

In calling someone a slut, YOU are making a JUDGEMENT about someone based on YOUR preconceived ideas or standards.

No skin off my nose...I've been called names much worse than that.

People can say and assume whatever they want of/about me. But I know WHO/WHAT I AM and I am sorry they do not find the time to know the REAL ME.

By azilana7037• 6 Oct 2007 11:30
Rating: 3/5
azilana7037

In another thread (by PM), it was predicted that if I start another topic, there will be an attack NOT to the topic but TO THE AUTHOR HERSELF….VIOLA !!! It did…

As I’ve said earlier at the start of this topic thread, the word "Slut"is a power insult. It is a direct attack upon someone's sexuality..

I got tagged as one because as one has said and I quote “I find you very vocal about expressing your ideas and sometimes indirectly from personal experiences on sex in public and for me it is not proper and immoral to discuss in public like it is a taboo (IMHO)

What is immoral depends on one's understanding so what's the boundaries?

By azilana7037• 6 Oct 2007 08:13
Rating: 4/5
azilana7037

"being a slut....or plain being mean to other ppl..."

I guess there's no need pointing out who...it's to palpable to ignore

;-P

By Hussamf• 5 Oct 2007 23:29
Rating: 4/5
Hussamf

generalisation is abitch ..

i understand ur frustration , and share it with u about how easilly ppl in this part of th e world can tag a woman a slut..

On the other hand, some attitudes are slutty anywhere in the world, and here is no exception..!!!

the obsesstion with sex and sex related " issues" is also not exactlly an arab trait...

having said that, a slut is not merely a female who engages in many unretrained sexual endavours ( in my mind)

bieng a slut can easilly be snatching someone else;s boy friend or sabotaging a reationship delibratelly, or plain bieng mean to other ppl ..

http://hasous.spaces.live.com

"missiles, warships and nuclear weapons cannot establish security. Instead they destroy what peace and security build." Anwar Sadat

By anonymous• 5 Oct 2007 11:58
Rating: 4/5
anonymous

How are you nowadays Dear?

What you're getting involve again?

"Do unto others what you would have them do unto you!"

Judge not! that you be not judged!

By junarc2003• 5 Oct 2007 11:56
Rating: 5/5
junarc2003

hey slut..how about a coffee later? i missed your call lastnight... what is it about? btw jaxs phoned me from bahrain... i bet the slut's havin a good time now... think so?

geez..im havin a good time using the word eh... but i dont mind u callin me a slut...hehehe...

By nib• 5 Oct 2007 11:37
nib

not all ex s i call them slut. maybe i shud call her stupid but whatever:)

By anonymous• 5 Oct 2007 11:37
Rating: 3/5
anonymous

When I wrote the first post:

I couldn't sleep after watching 2 dvds the "platoon" and "band of brothers" with my brother (not with Mystica, I don't sleep over in any of my friends house and for sure Mystica would choose to be with her husband, LOL ) . And I tried to play my guitar for little while then still couldn't sleep. Finally, decided to log on to QL. I saw this thread, read it and finally encourage myself to post my opinion.

Then I fell asleep :-) and waking up now now, missing the basketball game at Al Arabi :-)

Cheers!

*** I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places. M. Twain***

By anonymous• 5 Oct 2007 11:06
Rating: 5/5
anonymous

Miss Azzy, I said I could tag you as one" here in QL not in real life.

But it's the same thing I will say if my views of morality is differs from you in real word , I could tag you as one but it doesn't mean I will not respect you as a person or go gossiping about you. I would be more likely keeping and calling you one silently.

Take Ms-Cat advice, "it only hurts when you let it" And it should only hurt if you are really concern on who tag you as one.

If having an opinion and voice it in public hurts then sorry I am just being honest here.

Cheers!

*** I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places. M. Twain***

By anonymous• 5 Oct 2007 10:45
Rating: 4/5
anonymous

I don't understand why are u now putting Mystica again, she doesn't even know what am doing this days :D I haven't seen her, but why I am explaining to you :-)

Like, it will change a thing that you are a self-confessed slut (you said that not me) and besides I don't think you understand my point. Ah well, it's you and you are entitled to be you.

Mystica has nothing to do with this Ms Azzy and I just voiced out my opinion on this, I don't understand why Gypsy is being so PARANOID again ;-)

Cheers!

*** I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places. M. Twain***

By anonymous• 5 Oct 2007 10:41
anonymous

That explains why pamy got married at the age of 40 Lousy , defies all laws of nature..... I want a slut too

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 5 Oct 2007 10:32
skdkak closed 1708224867

you are talking like a MCP.

ur ex gf has become a slut because she is EX now for you.

The way u say so, it shows she left u and u still cant digest it.

If u love someone. let them be happy where they are and wherever they are.

By nib• 5 Oct 2007 10:16
nib

my ex-gf was a slut and she is still a slut:)

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 5 Oct 2007 10:12
Rating: 4/5
skdkak closed 1708224867

good morning All sluts and B1tches..

So early in the morning and lot of stuff already written.. I am still sleepy..

By Gypsy• 5 Oct 2007 10:02
Gypsy

Wow, what a shocker, IOU thinks Azzy is a slut. Was Mystica giggling next to you when you wrote that?

"I fight with love and I laugh with rage, you have to live light enough to see the humor and long enough to see some change." Ani Difranco

By Mis-Cat• 5 Oct 2007 08:52
Mis-Cat

The the word only hurts if you let it.

By t_coffee_or_me• 5 Oct 2007 06:39
t_coffee_or_me

not getting sleep ??????????? u up so early

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

By anonymous• 5 Oct 2007 05:18
anonymous

May I be bold to say that, “I think I could tag you as one”? It is not because I am jealous of you or I envy you. It is because the way you portray yourself here in QL especially from the kind of topics you are interested with is the same as you put it “A true "slut" is defined as "…a person…who has the courage to lead life according to the radical proposition that sex is nice and pleasure is good for you.”

I cannot say that you are in real life because I don’t know you. I find you very vocal about expressing your ideas and sometimes indirectly from personal experiences on sex in public and for me it is not proper and immoral to discuss in public like it is a taboo (IMHO). I wouldn’t deny the fact that it is a “catchy” issue but I will undisclose it or will not even talk about it or question someone about in public forum like this. I could talk about it with my close friends but to public NO!

Like you said, “The topic is about how people would easily tag others of "such" word when the "fact' that THEY (accuser) don't know the PERSON...”

That’s how I can tag someone a slut (not that am using this wordregularly in real life, trust me even the B word I prefer not to use)

Your nature and courage of speaking about “it” in public, that makes you a slut to me.

I don’t mean to offend anyone here but hopefully I explain myself that it’s not only jealousy or envy to another person especially to another woman on how I could tag her slut. Perhaps, my bad, that I have a different meaning to the word.

Nowadays, it’s just an expression; to most people it doesn’t mean anything like you know regular “FCUK” “CNUT” “BIATCH”

Miss Azzy, I will repeat I have nothing against you, am just answering your question :D

Cheers!

*** I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell - you see, I have friends in both places. M. Twain***

By QHell• 5 Oct 2007 03:00
Rating: 4/5
QHell

Only Love & Respect of Others Make us Human.

===========================================

If you can not change your FAT, change your CLOTHS!

By Gypsy• 4 Oct 2007 23:44
Gypsy

Hussan, here a slut is any girl who isn't a virgin and isn't married. Therefore I find it frustrating.

"I fight with love and I laugh with rage, you have to live light enough to see the humor and long enough to see some change." Ani Difranco

By silversurfer• 4 Oct 2007 22:05
silversurfer

Hussamf, ged ouda heah, yah wierdo

By Hussamf• 4 Oct 2007 21:59
Rating: 4/5
Hussamf

hun

there is an inner slut in every woman...and thats a gr8 thing ( 2 me at least)

the idea is..is that woman allowing the inner slut to surface for EVERY ONE, or is she slective..

in other words, is she selling herslef cheap 2 anyone who tickels her fancy and says the right things, or is she more prudent and more restrained and channels this sluttiness in a monogomous relationship(s)

:)

u still havent asnwerd my question though hehe

http://hasous.spaces.live.com

"missiles, warships and nuclear weapons cannot establish security. Instead they destroy what peace and security build." Anwar Sadat

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 4 Oct 2007 13:56
skdkak closed 1708224867

slut is for homosapiens and b1..h for our pet female dog.

sorry for repetition.. QL didnt like the female partner of dog.

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 4 Oct 2007 13:53
skdkak closed 1708224867

slut is for homosapiens and bitch for our pet female dog

By anonymous• 4 Oct 2007 13:52
anonymous

In my opinion,there are two circumstances when this word is used:

1. Used by a male - when he finds a girl extremely attractive but has no guts to approach her.He approaches her but she doesn't notice him at all.Or ignores/slaps/yells at him.

2. Used by a female - Pure jealousy and a strong sense of lost opportunities.

:))

Life is Beautiful...Indeed!

By starseed• 4 Oct 2007 13:51
starseed

always a name for everything it seems :)

~ your thoughts create your reality ~

By Ragnarock Raider• 4 Oct 2007 13:38
Ragnarock Raider

Q:What's the difference between a slut and a b1tch?

A: A slut will sleep with anybody and a b1tch will sleep with anybody but you!

Stay safe all.

Perfection does not exist. The question therefore, is: what level of imperfection are we willing to settle for?

By anonymous• 4 Oct 2007 12:26
anonymous

Is he supposed to keep the 72 intact or..deflower them?...lol

What a god-fearing & innocent girl who has not sinned in her entire life is supposed to do with 72 virgins? Satisfy them or satisfy herself?

That is why I tell people ...."they are not supposed to take the words as they are but are supposed to understand what the person is trying to tell."

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 4 Oct 2007 10:53
skdkak closed 1708224867

if u do not like this topic. y did u bother to comment. u could have ignored this forum and saved ur precious time and energy.

The very fact that you commented means u have some thing to say or are u one among those MCP's.

By starseed• 4 Oct 2007 10:43
Rating: 3/5
starseed

another word which each individual hangs their own meanig... one should be able to live as freely as one chooses, without having to worry about who says what about them - and if they ARE being pointed at... SO WHAT! The finger-pointer must get over themselves... :)

By jauntie• 4 Oct 2007 10:40
Rating: 4/5
jauntie

THE LADY IS A TRAMP :D

She gets too hungry, for dinner at eight

She loves the theater, but doesnt come late

Shed never bother, with people shed hate

Thats why the lady is a tramp

Doesnt like crap games, with barons and earls

Wont go to harlem, in ermine and pearls

Wont dish the dirt, with the rest of those girls

Thats why the lady is a tramp

She loves the free, fresh wind in her hair

Life without care

Shes broke, but its ok

She hates california, its cold and its damp

Thats why the lady is a tramp

Doesnt like dice games, with sharpies and frauds

Wont go to harlem, in lincolns or fords

Wont dish the dirt, with the rest of those broads

Thats why the lady is a tramp

(Compliments of Rogers/Hart and good ol' blue eyes - Frank Sinatra)

By cg• 4 Oct 2007 10:20
Rating: 5/5
cg

I think some girls/women wear the slut label with a certain degree of pride. This is not a facetious comment, simply an observation of changing times. Think about it ... there was a time when any woman would have shuddered at the thought of being considered a "slut". Nowadays, women openly admit to (a)being, (b) being referred to, and (c) being thought of as a slut. It's simply not the earth-shattering event it used to be (i.e. one's reputation could be ruined, hence ending a woman's slightest hope of marrying well or advancing professionally, etc.).

Gypsy's comment is a case-in-point. "Depending on the culture or religion I myself am a slut ..." I think where only negative connotations used to be attached to sexual promiscuousnous amongst women, today women wear the sexual hat much more comfortably. Western females commonly refer affectionately to each other using terms that were formerly considered offensive. For example, "you're such a slut!", "you're such a biA**tch", "aren't you the cougar?", etc. Women now also refer to each other as female "players".

In Western culture at least, these words, while still considered offensive to some, no longer carry with them quite the stigma they once did. The meaning of the labels has evolved in such a way that while the words may still be used in an offensive manner (i.e. to convey an insult), they may also be used affectionately or as a badge of honor of sorts. It's much cooler now to be a bad girl and flaunt it than it was years ago. Changing times and trends, no more no less.

By hjsarwar• 4 Oct 2007 10:20
hjsarwar

dont u think its a stupid topic.....a useless thing to be discussed...........what SLUT ..every one knows then there is need to open such a topic .....

By t_coffee_or_me• 4 Oct 2007 10:18
Rating: 3/5
t_coffee_or_me

they are called gigolos n not man-wh*res

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

By azilana7037• 4 Oct 2007 10:13
Rating: 2/5
azilana7037

I honestly appreciate your comments...

By skdkak closed 1708224867• 4 Oct 2007 10:05
Rating: 5/5
skdkak closed 1708224867

whether a SLUT or a STUD. Its all due to male dominance or call it MCP (Male chauvinism, male chauvinist PIG) over the ages. Women have been considered homosapiens of a lesser category (I however differ from this point of view).

Its simply male ego that comes out with these slangs. If it was a female dominated world. we would be living in a better world around us.

By Gypsy• 4 Oct 2007 09:41
Gypsy

Oh come on Hussanmf, surely if you can joke about anything it's the 72 virgins??? I mean we are talking about sluts and virgins here.

"I fight with love and I laugh with rage, you have to live light enough to see the humor and long enough to see some change." Ani Difranco

By Hussamf• 3 Oct 2007 22:08
Rating: 5/5
Hussamf

U r a an intelligent person..( i assume )..

When talking 2 masses of limited inttelect, the prophet would describe things that appeal to their fancy...

There is absolutely no telling what heaven is actually like ( in the words of God in the quran), which superceeds anything the prophet ever said...

So dont take things so litrally and into the heart, u r smarter than that..

taking it so litrally in a negative way, is in my openion as absurd as taking it litrally in a possitive way ..

extremisim on either side of the continuem is just not plausable...

so , how does it feel bieng a slut?! hehehehe

cheers

http://hasous.spaces.live.com

"missiles, warships and nuclear weapons cannot establish security. Instead they destroy what peace and security build." Anwar Sadat

By azilana7037• 3 Oct 2007 21:58
Rating: 4/5
azilana7037

I think you miss the whole context of the topic. ;-P

By the_hippo• 3 Oct 2007 21:56
the_hippo

Okay, Azilana, so you say that there are girls who sleep around a lot and enjoy sex. The big question for most guys has got to be, "Where can I find them?"

By azilana7037• 3 Oct 2007 21:45
azilana7037

What exactly does it do for you? Does it make you feel better to call someone a slut? Are you jealous, envious, or what? Maybe you don't think that someone else should be flirting, kissing, having sex, etc., but what business is that of yours, and why does it concern you to the point of calling someone a slut? What makes you so "good" that you can stand in judgment of someone else's sexual habits? In calling someone a slut, you are making a judgment about someone based on YOUR preconceived ideas or standards.

THIS IS AN OPEN-ENDED post/comment/question; the only one who will react NEGATIVELY to this means he/she "GOT HIT by the GUILTY arrow"....hehehehe

By azilana7037• 3 Oct 2007 21:38
Rating: 3/5
azilana7037

"stud" or "player" are the most common words used but I'm yet to call a man with that "word"...lol

By azilana7037• 3 Oct 2007 21:32
Rating: 3/5
azilana7037

There are a variety of reasons why people call girls sluts – most of them have to do with jealousy, immaturity or ignorance.

Just as with any other insult, it is never acceptable to call someone a slut - for any reason. Doing so just shows a lack of maturity and reeks of misogyny.

Regardless of the reason for the use of the term, use of the word "slut” forces females into an "us vs. them" situation, and actually reinforces the negativity associated with female sexuality. Therefore, how one react to it will reflect on the person as an individual and on females in general.

By Gypsy• 3 Oct 2007 21:19
Rating: 2/5
Gypsy

The people who call someone a slut without even knowing them are just jealous of that person.

"I fight with love and I laugh with rage, you have to live light enough to see the humor and long enough to see some change." Ani Difranco

By azilana7037• 3 Oct 2007 21:15
azilana7037

The topic is about how people would easily tag others of "such" word when the "fact' that THEY (accuser) don't know the PERSON...

but thanks, anyway...

By t_coffee_or_me• 3 Oct 2007 20:12
t_coffee_or_me

http://www.answers.com/slut

If you can't change your fate, change your attitude.

By azilana7037• 3 Oct 2007 20:09
Rating: 4/5
azilana7037

A true "slut" is defined as "…a person…who has the courage to lead life according to the radical proposition that sex is nice and pleasure is good for you."

If that characterization defines one to any significant degree, then perhaps she are

By azilana7037• 3 Oct 2007 20:08
Rating: 5/5
azilana7037

people call other's "sluts" depending on their reasons and understanding.

Some will say yes, some will say no, to the accusation regardless of sexual proclivities, what you look like, how you dress, etc.

By Gypsy• 3 Oct 2007 20:01
Rating: 3/5
Gypsy

Serves em right. Personally I would rather go to heaven with 72 incredibly experienced men, who know what I want and I know what I want..but hey, that's why I'm a slut.

"I fight with love and I laugh with rage, you have to live light enough to see the humor and long enough to see some change." Ani Difranco

By azilana7037• 3 Oct 2007 19:51
Rating: 5/5
azilana7037

(NOTE: I got this list from a survey in the internet)

1. Guys normally refer to girls as sluts if they believe that they sleep around, regardless of how little they may actually know about the girl's sexual behavior. And of course, some guys will call any girl that won't go out with him a slut (or a biAtch).

2. A girl will call any other girl who has a boyfriend that she wants (or has one of her ex-boyfriends) a slut.

3. A girl will call a girl who is popular, especially with the boys, a slut, even if she's never had sex (and how would they know?). Girls feel threatened by other girls who are sexually active. They fear losing their boyfriends to "sluts."

4. Many people (of both sexes) will call girls who mature at an early age a slut, along with anyone who dresses in revealing clothes, has certain body piercings, or certain tattoos. People who use this as a basis for characterizing someone as a slut are usually too immature to understand the idiocy what they're doing.

5. Girls who are raped are often labeled as sluts after the fact, usually because of the stereotypical "she must've invited it" mindset that frequently accompanies being raped.

6. Girls who are not having sex spread slut-rumors to show that they are "better" than the "slut" who is sleeping around.

7. Girls (and to some extent even guys) who feel threatened by freedom and confidence label those who are not afraid to be different, "sluts.”

8. Frequently, people label others as sluts because they disagree with the girl's sexual lifestyle (regardless of what it might be), or because of jealousy or envy.

By Gypsy• 3 Oct 2007 19:51
Gypsy

I'm sorry, but 72 renewable virgins??? Seriously, God has obviously never had sex with a virgin if he thinks that's a gift.

"I fight with love and I laugh with rage, you have to live light enough to see the humor and long enough to see some change." Ani Difranco

By Gypsy• 3 Oct 2007 19:46
Rating: 4/5
Gypsy

Depending on the culture or religion I myself am a slut...so I really have no right to call anyone one. The sort of goes into my point about marriage, marriage somehow makes slut null and void.

"I fight with love and I laugh with rage, you have to live light enough to see the humor and long enough to see some change." Ani Difranco

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