To Ask or Not to ask?
I have an officemate, a local national, who I would catch staring at me. At first, I stare back blankly very briefly and just look away. For about a month, I could catch him doing that. Immersed with my work and looking up - there he was staring again. I couldn't help but shake my head in disbelief and smile while I ducked my head searching for an imaginary thing inside my drawer.
Then, there was this instance when I had no choice but to ask him for a favor since he is the one in the position to grant that. From there, I would smile back at him and there was even a time when I got an email from him early in the morning, asking me how my weekend was. Although, there were also times when I would get self-conscious that I would immediately look away whenever I see him staring at me. Sometimes, I would also feel annoyed because I really don't know what it is he wants!
If before, he was like a non-existent person to me, now, my consciousness is gravitating towards him. Two of my officemates who would also catch him staring at me have been vocal about their observation. One even asked if there is something between us.
Sometimes, I would think of asking him why he is always looking at me. Do you think it is proper or should I just carry on - let him stare and confuse me? I am afraid that I will end up nourishing a fairy tale in my mind and then be disappointed with a blatant rejection later on when he has already used up all his staring hours! :) It's been almost three months now that this thing has been happening. It's only recently that we would talk across our desks and share a joke either verbally or using sign language - our own sign language and we would laugh quietly as if we share our own private joke. I can say that I am enjoying this and that is why I am afraid - I'm afraid to enjoy this too much!!!!
Anyways, for whatever it's worth, I really pray deep inside that I may be able to maintain my composure and prevent myself from entertaining thoughts and ideas that would, in the end, hurt me.
I would appreciate your thoughts. I turn to all of you for words of wisdom!
Thank you!
or as simple as " is there any problem with my face?"
then give him a sharp look...
"BRING IT ON DUDE!!!"
when he stare at you just
aske him... " hi.. why you are looking to me...as that much i'm looking good today" (dont be silant between two Question)
what ever his answer ( yes or no ) or maybe he will make some joks
just answer him " i know that i`m looking good today... my boyfriend will come to take me...to go... any place you like
Don`t Love me be my friend
because those 99% is sex maniacs too pertaining to gypsy and magicdragons comment...they know their kind, believe them!
"BRING IT ON DUDE!!!"
he's after plain sex!
And one more thing, when he's checking you out?! he's fantasizing, indulging himself with the thought of getting physical with u, that's it! so be strong.
&feature=related
for all those trying to pick up the pieces again, i share with you the songs...
may we all become better persons and not bitter ones after a fall...
&feature=related
&feature=related
&feature=related
&feature=related
&feature=related
&feature=related
&feature=related
&feature=related
Another Original Pilipino Music (OPM)
SOMETIME SOMEWHERE
composed by Ryan Cayabyab
rendered by Regine Velasquez
We speak but the words we say mean nothing
We smile but the smiles we gave are wanting
We look upon each other's eyes, no spark
No glow, no real signs, but we both know
This is all for show
Until that sometime, somewhere,
We could show the world we have each other
Sometime, somewhere we need not hide our feelings,
We just keep on believing that we both have the time together
Sometime and somewhere,
somewhere our lips would be free at last
to say the words we've hungered to say
And we won't have to worry, we smile we won't say sorry
One look and we have cast our fears aside
Sometime, that sometime will turn to forever, for all time
Somewhere, our somewhere would not just be one place,
But everywhere
Until that sometime, somewhere,
We just have to be content with stealing glances
Somehow, content with saying nothing, smiles that are
Always wanting, though deep inside it hurts
Because we know
that our love, like love,
It's what it is, it's what we got
Our love, like love will have to wait
Until that sometime, somewhere
during moments like these...I prefer to hear a Lea Salonga or Regine Velasquez - Philippines' very own! :)
In fact, I am just lining it up in my media player to lull me to sleep...Sharing with you, here it is -
GOODBYE
by Regine Velasquez
Love, look what you've done
You stole my heart
While I was waiting
But now that you're gone
I guess I'll keep holding on to memories
Longing to tell you
All of my dreams
With you beside me
Wanting to hold you
That's all I need But how? It's over?
And now I know what a fool I've been
You told me you loved me
And that love never ends
(NOTE: Of course, the above three lines did not happen. :) - virgo)
I can't pretend
It's hard to say goodbye
Time, time be my friend
When will this end
This empty feeling
Now, I'll follow the sun
I guess I'll just carry on
Without you...
Longing to tell you
All of my dreams with you beside me
Wanting to hold you
That's all I need
But how? It's over...
And now I know what a fool I've been
You told me you loved me
And that love never ends
(Note: Again, the above three lines did not happen. :))
I can't pretend
It's hard to say goodbye...
Goodbye
Goodbye
Goodbye...
Taking into consideration majority of the comments and advice leaning on caution and friendly reminder and also around 2% of encouraging notes, I now lift everything to God. I pray for strength that I may hurdle this challenge on my firm conviction...I pray that God may cushion me once more from the pain of walking away from a possible turning point in my life. I may have been able to extinguish emotions or feelings of attraction in the past - sometimes, I think I have already mastered the art of denying myself even a glimpse of happiness, only to be surprised by a tinge of pain everytime I do so. It's like letting a dream die. But, I have also noticed that somehow, I succeed in banishing any emotions or attraction towards another person whenever I will myself to do so. It only takes a matter of time for me to be able to pick myself up again.
I feel comforted with the thought that if things are really meant to be, love will finally find me but I leave everything to God once more and shall approach things carefully - distancing a bit of myself from the object of my affection and maintaining a civil and professional relationship with him. It's better to maintain my status quo than to throw all caution to the wind and regret in the end.
Again, my sincerest thanks to all of you. If I falter in my resolve, I shall always open this forum to "re-charge" and boost my morale.
You and you alone can answer if he is 'The One'
By the time he'll ask you to marry him.
That's the time you will think and may cOnsider the 1%.
There is someone i know who is happily married to a local
They are happily married until today and are now blessed with three beautiful girls and a boy..
Stay REAL
I truly appreciate the words of advice and reminders. If this forum seems to be offensive, then pardon me. That is not the intention of the post. I trust that the Moderators will remove this post when necessary.
nor siblings. not at the cost of ur personal life. it's soo kind of u to, but based on my experience, prepare to be rejected by those same siblings ur helping.
am i too pessimistic? hope i'm wrong.
for the main quaestion,
i doubt he's interested in the first place. not even for a flirt. but i think he is causing u big harm:
for others gossiping and watching soon they will assume that ur no longer available, if not already crossed the line. so cut it short either way:
or become envolved or make the world know ur single and looking,...and virgin.
there is no need to ask... it is obvious... and evrybody knows that ACTION SPEAKS LOUDER THAN WORDS...
I for one, I'm not saying locals are BADDDDD...oops..,..
like us filipino or the rest of other nationalities there are bad pipol and good one...
Let him keep staring,but you have to keep yourself not to fall from his stares, problem is by now he thinks there is something special between the 2 of you,coz in your innocent way u have given him signal that you like himm too because you look and smile back at him... you even have your own sign language....
I know it will hard for you since evryday of your life you see him coz you are working in the same company... It is a nice feeling though to be stared at by a handsome young man, it means you are special, beautiful in his eyes...BUT...IT IS A DANGER SIGN ALSO...KEEP AWAY MY DEAR...
GOODLUCK....
Glitterfy.com - Glitter Graphics
Umm ... why do you think he is staring at you and sending you emails asking how your weekend was... Pretty simple = dont need to be a rocket scientist to figure that out ..... gimme a break !!!
It's hard being strong...there are moments when loneliness also creeps in...but I leave everything to God...I have reached this age and attained the single status in life out of my own choice...because there are greater loves that need to be prioritised...Pardon me all for the outpouring...but I guess this is again one of the dynamics of emotions that an "old maid" like me undergoes...:) Good thing there is QL to pour out my emotions and enable me to grab back my sanity! :)
Loneliness is one of the consequences of my choice of state of life...It's just so ironic, that when things are getting rosier for my siblings (all of them are already here and so is my father!), when things seem to be okay for me to think of my own happiness (in a few more months because I still want everything to be perfectly okay for my family), somebody catches my eye and seeped his way into my consciousness..but that somebody doesn't seem to be right.
But what to do? Life must go on.....Be still my heart, be still...:)
Again, my sincerest thanks to you all for your time and for being with me in my vulnerable moment.
But you know what the problem is? Other people put up the standards for me that'y why only two brave men dared and asked for my hand in marriage. But you know what? They couldn't wait and sought happiness in the arms of other women. What to do?
If only they know how simple my heart's desires are. :(
It's very rare for a man to catch my eye and rare as it may seem, most of the time, I put up a wall and extinguish my feelings to give way for my family's welfare. I always felt that being the eldest, it is my responsibility to help my parents help my siblings. I have also vowed to myself, that I would get married only when the time comes that all my siblings are okay because I don't want to share my trouble with my future husband. I have long been hoping that once I have secured the future of my siblings and their families, I could retreat into a very simple but happy family life with only my husband and at my age, if we would still be blessed with a child - that will definitely complete me. Most of the time, though, because I have already reached this age still single, I would also question myself if dreaming for a family life of my own is still worth it?
I believe that this is one of the rare moments that a man was able to pass through my defence. But this will definitely not be a rare moment for me to once again control my emotions.
Like I said in the poem I wrote during my vulnerable moment which FS found in one of my posts..."Be still, my heart, be still..."
Thank you all for the reminders...thank you for the advice...thank you for the time you gave to this forum.
I am feeling a lot better now and once again in control of my errant emotions...:)
Virgo u r on hell of strong woman!!! keep on being strong....
yes madam tess, it's the other side of my character...
you don't have to strengthen your conviction of being single, you should get married soon since you're already 35 years old........there's a lot of filipino guys out there waiting for you, all you have to do is open your eyes and the window of your heart for simple things
if you could look at my previous posts...this is my way of strengthening my conviction. I have stayed single and unattached for 35 years controlling whatever emotions I may have for men who professed their love for me because my true happiness at the moment is the welfare of my siblings and their families, my two old aunts who have also remained single, my father and his new life with my stepmother (my mother passed away already..today is actually her 7th year death anniversary)...I may have been swayed for a while,but I will collect all the strength I could get, rebuild my fortress and maintain my single blessedness along with all of your reminders and comments. :)
She shouln't have allowed herself to be pampered too much. Right from the start, that's already not a good sign. I just hope that we, Filipinas, should maintain our pride and exercise full discretion in accepting gifts and favors. When much is given, much is expected,but devaluating the true worth of a person in the process.
I pray for her and the child that she carries in her womb. May she raise up the child with much dignity and courage - believing still that inspite of her turn of luck, the child is the best gift she got from the man she once loved.
I think your should better ask him, at least it will clear the situatuion. Otherwise how long you will keep on thinking "one sided" feelings.
Be confident and ask him straight away!!!!!!!
well i have one suggestion, virgo might tell you how she got her heart stolen ( type of staring).....
Virgo it is better to stay single than being in a r/ship which u will end up being hurt.
Well virgo, you definitely deserve to fall for someone, and have someone fall for you. Just not a local. :)
Indeed gypsy, and hope eye candy doesn't loose her job soon
I have been through a lot in life that's why I am extra careful...and that is why, as I have mentioned in my post, I am posting my anxieties here so that I will have comments and reminders that shall help me strengthen my conviction during moments of vulnerability. I have stayed single and completely unattached for 35 years while caring for sick loved ones and helping out my siblings and whole family.
Having myself roasted through this forum is my way of processing this fleeting emotion because like I said, I am afraid to enjoy the situation. I have once vowed to myself that I can not afford to be happy unless I have fulfilled my dreams for my family.
I really thank each one of you for your comments. You may not know it, but you are helping me rebuild the fortress that is somehow chipped by the gentleman's tender looks and kindness. :)
Let me guess EyeCandy. You're boyfriend is a local?
well if ur a risk taker, start out platonic. If he doesn't push things and is willing to remain that way then maybe u guys have hope.↲
Cuz not all qatari guys are bad. On that TRUST ME. You'll never know till u give it a shot. And from the looks of it, ur pretty interested.
Maybe you don't stare in her eyes, brit. What do you stare at anyways?
Brit..Personally I have to see you to give you an answer :)
How come I don't get the same reaction when I stare at Vimmin ???
you loved the attention your getting from him! it flatters you obviously but leave it that way, it should'nt go beyond that, and it will never never go beyond that!
.
.
take me or leave me, im not changing....
Ajnabi.. I meant a broken heart.
That was me at my vulnerable point...I was about to burst hence I wrote it..:)
Self-preservation....
Better to write down than act on things I might regret later..:)
If you guys cant encourage....Pls dont demoralize people falling in love....lol
Aana free, jaana free,
Pakde gaye tho khana free.
my advice, get someone from our own backyard
Well good luck to you virgo. Just remember, it's not worth it.
At the back of my mind I am thinking the same way as you do. I need to hear or rather read those words coming from other women to strengthen my conviction.
I have posted my anxieties here in QL because I need objective points of view. Also, because of the delicate matter, I don't want to solicit views from my friends in our workplace. I am also the type of person who don't hang out with friends - I am a homebody. My routine is office-home-office with variation of going to carrefour for groceries. :) So, there's really not too much people that I could ask or share my predicament with.
I need your comments and this forum so that from time to time I could go back and read this whenever I feel weakened in my resolve to come up with a brave front and put an invisible wall between us. I believe that in time, if I will it, my fondness of him will fade and I will maintain my single blessedness!
I am thankful to QL because for somebody like me who do not socialize much, I can still reach out and be reached out to by wonderful people!
I honestly don't know how someone can be this stupid and gullible. I know the locals can be quite good looking, but everyone knows what there situation is, the chances of it working out are 1 in 50,000.
wish people learn from their mistakes!! *sighhhh*
yeah, he will not stare at you again coz you'll be deported and he could do his staring to another filipina and again back to the begining of the story with a different victim..
when are you going to learn from the stupidity of others
Predictions of Gypsy...most likely...lol
Heart Break or heart Attack Qatarilady :)
-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-
"(A man is great by deeds, not by birth.)"
FS ..that thread says it all..Nice work QL detective
Since you are giving prediction here, I will also give mine..If this two lost soul starts dating and they will be caught by CID, definitely the lady will be in jail while the local guy will be out and enjoying his life again...poor lady, tsk tsk tsk!
MO RIN...YUN LANG!!!
Virgo from your previous posts its obvious...
http://www.qatarliving.com/node/604726
My prediction. In a couple of months she'll find herself without a job.
Girl : Why you are staring at me all the time?
Guy : You are so beutiful thats why
Girl : Blushs
Guy : BTW wats your weekend plan
girl : nothing
guy : ok then we could.............love story begins
My prediction : after a couple of weeks...he will not stare you again..
You're in for a heart-break :(
Be careful
don't be stupid, another arab
lol rMs...
Girl! you are getting hooked by the way he looks at you..Hoping that he is not using voodoo magic to catch your attention..Try to observe for few more years before you conclude with your feelings...lolz!
MO RIN...YUN LANG!!!
When you are in doubt, say "NO".
...you should not have posted this here. You might not like what's yet to come ;)lol
I'am not doubting your judgement though. Just a remark :))
Source:
- A study Conducted by FriedUnicorn - Vol I (September,1999)
Love in qatar...........Oh no pls
like cricket where one day internationals are more popular than a five day test match..
I hope u understand what i mean.
Aana free, jaana free,
Pakde gaye tho khana free.
fallen in love, i think not MD. maybe virgo is getting fond of the stare she gets and the somewhat special attention that comes with the stare and as she mentioned the email asking her how her weekend was. one thing i noticed though is that she's not offended by being stered at, maybe because the guy is good looking, maybe he's a very polite gentleman, lots of maybes.
and what exactly do you want to ask?
'SO DARK THE CON OF MAN'
"Good things take their time."
3 months staring each other ? WTFF ??????
--
tEaCh Me RuLeS, i'Ll TeAcH hOw To BrEaK iT ..
rMs..!!
99% of other men, too, gypsy!
Do you feel butterflies in your tummy when you see him? Do you miss him when you don't see him? Do you feel a small baby in you lap kicking it's feet in the air when you are around him?
If the answer is yes.You are in love. :)
Source:
- A study Conducted by FriedUnicorn - Vol I (September,1999)
You'd be foolish to pursue this. 99% of Qatari men want Filipina's for sex and sex only.
You have already fallen in love with him.
Doing anything to stop him will only increase the mutual attraction.
Source:
- A study Conducted by FriedUnicorn - Vol I (September,1999)
What do you want to ask him? To stop staring?