Your Wife's Rating To Your Actions
How to take care of your wife:
In the world, one single rule applies to the men: Make the Woman happy. Do something she likes, and you get points. Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted. You don't get any points for doing something she expects. Sorry, that's the way the game is played.
Here is a guide to the point system:
SIMPLE DUTIES
-- You make the bed (+1)
-- You make the bed, but forget the decorative pillow (0)
-- You throw the bedspread over rumpled sheets (-1)
-- You go out to buy her what she wants (+5)
-- In the rain (+8)
-- But return with Beer (-5)
-- You check out a suspicious noise at night (0)
-- You check out a suspicious noise, and it is nothing (0)
-- You check out a suspicious noise and it is something (+5)
-- You pummel it with iron rod (+10)
-- It's her pet (-10)
SOCIAL ENGAGEMENTS
-- You stay by her side the entire party (0)
-- You stay by her side for a while, then leave to chat with a college buddy (-2)
-- Named Tina (-4)
-- Tina is a dancer (-10)
HER BIRTHDAY
-- You take her out to dinner (0)
-- You take her out to dinner and it's not a sports bar (+1)
-- Okay, it's a sports bar (-2)
-- And it's all-you-can- eat night (-3)
-- It's a sports bar, it's all-you-can- eat night, and your face is painted the colours of your favourite team (-10)
A NIGHT OUT
-- You take her to a movie (+2)
-- You take her to a movie she likes (+4)
-- You take her to a movie you hate (+6)
-- You take her to a movie you like (-2)
-- It's called 'DeathCop' (-3)
-- You lied and said it was a foreign film about orphans (-15)
YOUR PHYSIQUE
-- You develop a noticeable potbelly (-15)
-- You develop a noticeable potbelly and exercise to get rid of it (+10)
-- You develop a noticeable potbelly and resort to baggy jeans and baggy Hawaiian shirts (-30)
-- You say, "It doesn't matter, you have one too." (-8000)
ENJOY THE 'BIG' QUESTION
-- She asks, "Do I look fat?" (-5) [Yes, you LOSE points no matter WHAT]
-- You hesitate in responding (-10)
-- You reply, "Where?" (-35)
-- Any other response (-20)
COMMUNICATION
-- When she wants to talk about a problem , you listen, displaying what looks like a concerned _____expression (0)
-- You listen, for over 30 minutes (+50)
-- You listen for more than 30 minutes without looking at the TV (+500)
-- She realizes this is because you have fallen asleep (-10000)
feed her fish and hips every day
dress her in sackkeep
keep her pregnet
have sex with her mother
have sex with her sisters
have sex with bthe whole family
Thenn you can all wear long robes and cover faces
and bcome anotherv tribe here in the uae
more than 60% ..... so that means whatever you do she is hardly satisfied :-D
entertaining, thanks for giving me a good laugh. Most if not all married men can relate to this. Brilliant!
tsk, tsk, tsk...pitiful husband
She dosn't care if you come up to a solution for the problem but all she care is showing sympathy & giving continous compliments.
~noms~
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"Before God we are all equally wise ' and equally foolish" - Albert Einstein
"Do I look fat?" is a loaded question that any answer or no answer is a wrong answer, including "No, dear."
You're LYING!!!!!! (-10000)Lol!
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The Cookie Monster said it.
I also don't plagiarize...
Yeah, stevethetyke, "It's amazing how much you can do with some peanuts!", says Bugs Bunny..
Well done Qatarlady! the whole battle of the sexes correctly condensed into 2 simple lines, Bravo....LOL
You listen to her problem and offer a solution(-10000)
You listen and only show compassion (+10000)
You take your wife for a romantic dinner + 5
You talk about her favourite subjects all night + 20
You kiss her on the lips as you finish you last glass of champange + 30
You are arrested by the police for kissing your wife and you are deported......
She asks, "Do I look fat?"
Answer: no,I think you need to gain some Kgs.
You Get +100
ha ha ha