ql'rs Forgive me Its LittleJohnny all the way

The teacher at the beginning of the class says:

"OK kids, we are going to talk about sexual education today. First we'll talk about how the human reproduction goes on..."

Immediately, little Johnny raises his hand, and desperately tries to get the teacher's attention. But the teacher, knowing how little Johnny is about these things, goes on...

"... First, a man a woman have to be in love... "

But little Johnny keeps his hand up, waving it up and down, and from one side to the other one.

The teacher ignores him.."..They have to be very much in love because..."

But now little Johnny even starts making noise with his feet, so the teacher decides to acknowledge him:

" OK, little Johnny. What do you want to say."

Little Johnny then stands up, and says:

"I just wanted to ask. Those of us who have already f*****, can we leave?"

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One day the teacher came to class with a rose placed in her cleavage.

She asked, "Can anyone tell me what roses drink? How about you, Johnny ?"

"Milk!" answered Little Johnny.

"No, I'm sorry. That's the wrong answer. Roses drink water," explained the teacher.

"Wow!" Johnny exclaimed. "I didn't know the stem was that long!"

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Johnny returns from school and says he got an F in arithmetic.

"Why?" asks the father.

"The teacher asked 'How much is 2x3?' I said '6'"

"But that's right!" "Then she asked me 'How much is 3x2?"

"What's the f****** difference?"

"That's exactly what I said."

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Johnny's parents were out of town once and so they asked that young female teacher to stay for that time in their house.

Before going to bed Johnny says to her "Oh, please, I'm so afraid to be by myself, please, sleep in my bed."

She agrees, they go to bed.

In the morning she wakes up to find a big hairy-chested man in her bed.

She exclaims: "Johnny? Where is Johnny?!!!"

"Johnny? Who is Johnny? Is that the little boy selling the tickets outside?"

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Johnny is taking a shower with his mother and says, "Mom, what those things on your chest?"

Unsure how to reply, she tells Johnny to ask his dad at breakfast tomorrow, quite certain the matter would be forgotten.

Johnny didn't forget. The following morning he asked his father the same question.

His father, always quick with the answers, says, "Why Johnny, those are balloons. When your mommy dies, we can blow them up and she'll float to heaven."

Johnny thinks that's neat and asks no more questions.

A few weeks later, Johnny's dad comes home from work a few hours early.

Johnny runs out of the house crying hysterically, "Daddy! Daddy! Mommy's dying!"

His father says, "Calm down son! Why do you think Mommy's dying?"

Johnny replies, "Uncle Harry is blowing up Mommy's balloons and she's screaming 'Oh God, I'm coming'
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SORRY EVERYONE I COULD NOT RESIST FROM POSTING