MALE PROCEDURE & FEMALE PROCEDURE

arraya
By arraya

A sign in the Bank Lobby reads: "Please note that this Bank is
installing new "Drive-through" teller machines enabling customers to
withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new
facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when
accessing their accounts. After months of careful research, MALE &
FEMALE procedures have been developed. Please follow the appropriate
steps for your gender."

MALE PROCEDURE
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.

FEMALE PROCEDURE
1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.
3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up.
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.
17. Write deposit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided.
23. Give appropriate one-fingered hand signal to irate male driver waiting behind you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release Parking Brake.

By azilana7037• 18 Aug 2008 17:50
Rating: 4/5
azilana7037

but I'm guilty with items #26 & #27

By mjamille28• 18 Aug 2008 17:47
mjamille28

panda,... what's the last name of your boss??

By mjamille28• 18 Aug 2008 17:42
mjamille28

lol,.. panda what is the full name of your boss?

By panda• 18 Aug 2008 17:40
panda

no the first one...

Les hypocrites,comme les abeilles,ont le miel à la bouche et l'aiguillon caché...

By mjamille28• 18 Aug 2008 17:37
mjamille28

panda, which one was the last i sent you?

By panda• 18 Aug 2008 17:37
panda

Jamy, my BOSS is william lol, the guy who sent you these emails ;P

Les hypocrites,comme les abeilles,ont le miel à la bouche et l'aiguillon caché...

By Dracula• 18 Aug 2008 17:33
Dracula

26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.

27. Release Parking Brake.

.

i cant stop...hhhahahahahaaa

By mjamille28• 18 Aug 2008 17:30
mjamille28

lol panda.. pretending to work huh.. im telling your boss.. hahaha

By panda• 18 Aug 2008 17:30
panda

ROFL!!!!! i just have seen the lasts one....HAHAHAHA very funnnnnny lolll

Les hypocrites,comme les abeilles,ont le miel à la bouche et l'aiguillon caché...

By panda• 18 Aug 2008 17:26
panda

yes of course Jamy...thnx it was very nice joke...now i'm doing my daily report...(about QL lol)

Les hypocrites,comme les abeilles,ont le miel à la bouche et l'aiguillon caché...

By mjamille28• 18 Aug 2008 17:22
mjamille28

lol panda.. did you read all my emails???

By anonymous• 18 Aug 2008 17:21
anonymous

Salax

'y do men get attracted to women?'.. their stupidity is so seductive.

They most be Blonde.

We should call it, love at first sight... LOL

The other day, I did experience almost the same with this young Qatari woman while waiting for my reading glasses.

She burst in to the office, crying that her contacts were irritating her eyes and that she wanted a refund. Of course, it was windy and dusty outside, she never read the warning label of her new contact lenses. All she got for free was some cleaning solution and some comfort words from the customer service representative.

She walked away, still scratching her eyes badly.

Who is wrong and who is right?

I don't know, but I was wearing my swimming goggles to protect myself from the flying sand. LOL

I hear St. Patrick was an Englishman!"

By mjamille28• 18 Aug 2008 17:20
mjamille28

well, certainly not me.... lol

By panda• 18 Aug 2008 17:20
panda

koolkat....is that your real laugh? lol...

Les hypocrites,comme les abeilles,ont le miel à la bouche et l'aiguillon caché...

By koolkat• 18 Aug 2008 17:17
koolkat

lol....nice one there Arraya, i totally agree with the inventor(s) of these procedures and like salax said,their "STUPIDITY is very SEDUCTIVE".

Life is like riding a bicycle,you dont fall off unless you stop pedalling

By Dracula• 18 Aug 2008 17:14
Dracula

damn true!

hahahahaha

By adnanmzfr• 18 Aug 2008 17:13
adnanmzfr

Women by nature get confused easily under stress or any task that requires rather quick action.

By mjamille28• 18 Aug 2008 17:07
mjamille28

lol... not all women are like that....

By nazek• 18 Aug 2008 16:50
nazek

where did u get that from it's sooo funny

By baloch• 13 Jun 2008 10:58
baloch

lol funny but

fact

By Secguy• 13 Jun 2008 10:13
Secguy

Yes welllll......least said to save sanity....Goood one.

Motivation is when your dreams put on work clothes.

- Ben Franklin

By dandy0510• 13 Jun 2008 10:13
dandy0510

hahaha.

27 steps for Female. (this is True!)

****************************************

PEACE NOT WAR FOR 2008!

< www.applei.ph/one/ > 

 

By panda• 13 Jun 2008 10:10
Rating: 4/5
panda

HAHAHAHA!!! very funny....but this is their charm....

MySpace International

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