Blonde Convention - enjoy!
80,000 blondes meet in the Kansas City Chiefs Stadium for a "BLONDES ARE NOT STUPID CONVENTION". The leader says, "We are all here today to prove to the world that blondes are not stupid. Can I have a volunteer?" A great looking blonde gingerly works her way through the crowd and steps up to the stage. The leader asks her, "What is 15 plus 15?" After 15 or 20 seconds she says, "Eighteen!" Obviously everyone is a little disappointed. Then 79,999 blondes started cheering, "Give her another chance! Give her another chance!" The leader says, "Well since we've gone to the trouble of getting 80,000 of you in one place and we have the world-wide press and global broadcast media here, gee, uh, I guess we can give her another chance." So she changes the question and asks, "What is 5 plus 5?" After nearly 30 seconds she eventually says, "Ninety?" The leader is quite perplexed, looks down and just lets out a dejected sigh -- everyone is disheartened -- the blonde starts crying and the 79,999 girls begin to yell and wave their hands shouting, "GIVE HER ANOTHER CHANCE! GIVE HER ANOTHER CHANCE!" The leader, unsure whether or not she is doing more harm than damage, eventually says, "Ok! Ok! Just one more chance -- What is 2 plus 2?" The girl closes here eyes, and after a full minute eventually says, "Four?". Throughout the stadium, pandemonium breaks out as all 79,999 girls jump to their feet, wave their arms, stomp their feet and scream............. .. "GIVE HER ANOTHER CHANCE! GIVE HER ANOTHER CHANCE!"
An airline captain was breaking in a new blonde stewardess. The route they were flying had a layover in another city. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight. The next morning, as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day's route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up wondering what happened. She answered the phone, crying, and said she couldn't get out of her room. "You can't get out of your room?" the captain asked, "Why not?" The stewardess replied: "There are only three doors in here," she sobbed, "one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says 'Do Not Disturb'!"
Alligator Shoes A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana. She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking. After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, "Maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator so I can get a pair of shoes at a reasonable price!" The shopkeeper said, "By all means, be my guest. Maybe you'll luck out and catch yourself a big one!" Determined, the blonde turned and headed for the swamps, set on catching herself an alligator. Later in the day, the shopkeeper was driving home, when he spotted the young woman standing waist deep in the water, shotgun in hand. Just then, he saw a huge 9-foot alligator swimming quickly toward her. She took aim, killed the creature, and with a great deal of effort hauled it on to the swamp bank. Lying nearby were several more of the dead creatures. The shopkeeper watched in amazement. Just then the blonde flipped the alligator on its back, and frustrated, shouts out, "Damn it, this one isn't wearing any shoes either!"
that 6 pieces trick i did with my friend.. and he was like staring at me.. lol
nice one.. lolz..
one more here A blonde went to buy a Pizza and after ordering, the assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve. "Six please" she said, "I could never eat twelve!"
A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde were on their way to Heaven. God told them that the stairway to Heaven was 1000 steps, and that on every 5th step He would tell them a joke. He told them not to laugh at any of the jokes along the way or else they would not be able to enter Heaven.The brunette went first and started laughing on the 45th step, so she could not enter Heaven.The redhead went next and started laughing on the 200th step, so she could not enter Heaven either.Then, it was the blonde's turn. When she got to the 999th step, she started laughing."Why are you laughing?" God asked. "I didn't tell a joke.""I know," the blonde replied. "I just got the first joke."
"And by the way," the blonde added, "that's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari."hahahahahhaah damn... she ruined him...
My friend changed her hair color to blonde 'n ever since that people tend to talk to her more slowly ^^
i don't really understand why there are a lot of blonde jokes... lolThe Blonde Painter An ambitious young blonde woman, in need of money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type. She began, door to door, canvassing a wealthy neighborhood for work. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. "Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?" The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money. "You're finished already?" he asked. "Yes," the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats." Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. "And by the way," the blonde added, "that's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari."
tnx sanity!
Jak dude thatz very funny.
Q: Why do Blondes have TGIF written on their shoes? A: Toes Go In First. Q: What do SMART Blondes and UFOs have in common? A: You always hear about them but never see them. Q: Why do Blondes always smile during lightning storms? A: They think their picture is being taken.
here's another one...A blonde and a brunette are taking a walk, and the brunette goes, "Oh look! A dead bird!" The blonde looks up at the sky and goes, "Where?"
hhahahahahaha.... nice one guys.. morning morning is getting better now
A Blonde’s Flight To Chicago A commercial airplane is in flight to Chicago, when a blonde woman sitting in economy gets up and moves to an open seat in the first class section. A flight attendant watches her do this, and politely informs the woman that she must return to her seat in the economy class because that's the type of ticket she paid for. The blonde woman replies, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Chicago and I'm staying right here." After repeated attempts and no success convicing the woman to return to economy, the flight attendant goes into the cockpit and informs the pilot and co-pilot that there's a blonde bimbo sitting in first class who refuses to go back to her proper seat. The co-pilot goes back to the woman and explains why she needs to move, but once again the woman replies by saying, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Chicago and I'm staying right here." The co-pilot returns to the cockpit and suggests that perhaps they should have the arrival gate call the police and have the woman arrested when they land. The pilot says, "You say she's blonde? I'll handle this. I'm married to a blonde. I speak blonde." He kneels down next to the woman and whispers quietly in her ear, and she says, "Oh, I'm sorry," then quickly moves back to her seat in economy class. The flight attendant and co-pilot are amazed and ask him what he said to get her to move back to economy without causing any fuss. "I told her first class isn't going to Chicago."
Whilst on holiday, I went into a bank and said to the blonde clerk,'How much is 100 euros in sterling?''Exactly the same as it's worth anywhere else in the United Kingdom' She replied.
Think about it :O)
nice...
ha ha haa very funny.
lolx.. nice one :p
So, Blondes are not fools.