911 jokes
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller : Someone broke into my house and took a bite out of my ham and cheese sandwich .
Dispatcher : Excuse me?
Caller : I made a ham and cheese sandwich and left it on the kitchen table and wh en I came back from the bath room, someone had taken a bite out of it.
Dispatcher : Was anything else taken?
Caller : No, but this has happened to me before and I'm sick and tired of it!
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is the nature of your emergency?
Caller: I'm trying to reach nine eleven but my phone doesn't have an eleven on it.
Dispatcher: This is nine eleven.
Caller: I thought you just said it was nine-one-one
Dispatcher: Yes, ma'am nine-one-one and nine-eleven are the same thing.
Caller: Honey, I may be old, but I'm not stupid.
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What's the nature of your emergency?
Caller: My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart !
Dispatcher: Is this her first child?
Caller: No, you idiot! This is her husband!
And the winner is..........
Dispatcher: 9-1-1
Caller: Yeah, I'm having trouble breathing. I'm all out of breath. Darn....I think I'm going to pass out.
Dispatcher: Sir, where are you calling from?
Caller: I'm at a pay phone. North and Foster.
Dispatcher: ! Sir, an ambulance is on the way. Are you an asthmatic?
Caller: No.
Dispatcher: What were you doing before you started having trouble breathing?
Caller: Running from the Police
"is this her first child?"
" No Idiot!, this is her husband.."
hahahha ,,, ROFL :XD
---If you can't CONVINCE 'em, CONFUSE 'em!!!
I swear-to-God, this is true, I was in the dispatch center when it came in. "911. What is your emergency?" "My husband was shot!" "Calm down, ma'am, where was he shot?" "On the front porch!"
Mandi
please don't feel obliged to.
It's only a joke, afterall!
math 911.. thats hilarious!!!
"Always smile in the morning, it makes people wonder what you did last night"
he he heeeee
the winner call is really the winner :)
actually i m not criticizing anybody.... but i hate to read long/bulky forum topic!... read last ... forget first!!!
"son is son till he gets wife
daughter remains daughter till the end of life"
Lolz,,,
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We were given: Two hands to hold. To legs to walk. Two eyes to see. Two ears to listen. But why only one heart? Because the other was given to someone else. For us to find.
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OMG
was that a joke???
lolzz.