older women/younger men and marriage

My brothers in a relationship with a woman 15 year older( hes 40). Theyve been living together for 10 years and its still going strong. Age doesnt matter if your happy with the one your with..

Kenya Queen, time and again, we can't chose who to fall in love with...nothing guarantee any relationship so it is really just like any couple of the same age..hoping that it will be forever. Enjoy life and good luck.

sorry i offended you, it wasn't my intention. I was just trying to point out that looks can be deceiving when your in the dating world. Secondly I was making a point that you had a good point. If you feel that any thing one says in these forums is upsetting to you maybe take it up with them by IMing them. I am sure other people in this fourm got the "jist" of what I meant. And if they didn't then I would expect that they would kindly ask me what I meant and not make a fuss about it.

And if you done any traveling you would know that with the change of weather comes changes in your body. For example I lived in canada the air is more salty here, my skin gets quite dry and ichy. 2 years ago I traveled to Gulin in china. They air there was moist and thus made my skin more supple and soft. I actually did not have to use any kind of skin cream while there lol.

Hope this clears any thought of what you thought I was talking about.

Cheers!

as well as you two are happy, then what is the issue? Just stop listening to the people around you ... You would never satisfy them at all ... Some would believe that the woman being older, she would be pulling the man out of his ears and make him follow her ... just a narrow minded vision ...

Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment. (Gautama Buddha)

wow.. i have a feeling that you just turned out your own nice idea, and brought it, as brit noticed, to Gigolos issue.. and all your 'second.. don't mix yourself with me, ok?? we are in different stage of life..

and all these your notes about smooth vibrant skin.. what for??. i feel like all the discussion has been spoiled... sorry.... i am out of here..

But don't you think its kind of sad to see this. I wonder if these woman are marrying any of these younger men. I am guessing that they are as it is a way out of there country and a beginning into greener pastures.

In any case i stand by my decision to marry much younger husband. I do hope that the wine is still fine at least for the next 20 years.

I am glad to hear that at least one other man on this form has married an older woman. I would like to hear more from charan on his experiences.

Although there is a problem! an important one! FASHION! he dresses a lot better than I do. lol

What you refer to are basically Gigolos catering to the needs of the older white "sexual tourist".. This is beginning to get quite common in Kenya...

You tell em sister, you got the right idea. Women are not taking knitting classes at 50 these days. We have the tools that help give us a healthy life. It is true to some extent that men are aging faster than women due to lack of consideration for their bodies. I see a lot of men here with big old fat jelly bellies walking with their beautiful fit slim wives.

No, Not in general, from what I see here in canada. I actually don't see that many older woman with younger men. Not to insult anyone, but blacks and asians tend to not age as fast as other races, not sure why! but I have travelled a lot and it is clear that they don't. I myself look young for my age and when I travel to hotter countries my skin becomes smoother and more vibrant. So, When I first met my husband it was attraction all the way around. And age did not come up until a week and a half after we started hanging out. So by that time we developed more feelings for each other. I too was actually surprised at how old he was but in any case the age did not bother me until after he asked me to marry him. I tried to reason why I should not marry him and then I reasoned why I should marry him. For me the answer was clear. I was never more in love. I am not questioning my marriage to my husband to my husband cause at this point no matter the age difference we are in it for life.

I must admit though, that I do see some women and men trying to look or even act younger than their age. Especially men in my community, not sure why, but to me it is always men between 40-60 trying to be hip around the younger girls. Its rather raunchy seeing a wrinkled old man hitting on the younger babes and trust me they say the stupidest things. I guess I could say the same for women but I really don't see it that much with woman. However, I have been to many african countries and have seen many older white women strolling along beaches and tourist attraction with younger black/arabic men between the ages of 18 and 30. These women are usually about 45-60 and are fat and wrinkled. It does appear that they dress in a younger fashion and their behavior is a bit loud.

Wine goes off pretty quick , if the cork is not working properly...

Hey Oldies are Goldies like Wine :)

Ban Spoon Feeding not Me

well...yes, if the guy wants to become a widow.. but if GAL wants to be a widow, she should marry an older man.. but even with all that, you NEVER KNOW who will be gone first.. so??..lol..

and anyway,... would you really think about becoming a rich widow during your entire marriage? can you live with the person, and show him/her your affection for years and years, if the only your purpose is to become a rich widow, which is also a big question??

..i don't think so... LOL..

or either way around.. :P

that's correct charan.. exactly as an other way round: in case of older husband, woman becomes a Rich widow at a reletively younger age... or it might happen the way, when wife and husband are the same age, but husband dies much earlier (that's pretty common by the way), and again woman becomes a Rich widow in a reletively younger age... in ANY combination usually one of them will die earlier then another, so another become a widow.... so why it should apply to only "senior woman- young guy" combination???? we all will die sooner or later, and noone knows WHO is sooner and WHO is later, despite the age...:)

adnanmzfr.. 3 years is not a difference even.. who would talk about 3 years? and you are so wrong about "women getting older sooner than men".. look at the couple of the same age, let's say around 35-38.... woman is looking after herself and looks fit and taken care of, she is sexy and attractive... a man obtains a huge belly and huge laziness...LOL... and that's when woman starts looking AT younger guys... she looks young and attractive, her partner looks like given up his life already...LOL..

QS - Morale of the Story is always marry an older woman than you (10 yers or more recommended)

Ban Spoon Feeding not Me

QS - and it will give a strong will for the man to live longer to reap the benifts of the patients after he become a Rich widow at a reletively younger age ;)

Ban Spoon Feeding not Me

I think if the difference is upto 3 years then its okay but not more than that as women get older sooner than men.

Little older women may be better in some case as they may be more logical towards solving the problem in the practical life of man woman relashion ship and can support/help their men better.

LOL.. charan... and that's what i am saying: it's not a big deal...Demy Moor and Ashton Kutcher are about the same differnce..LOL..

brit.. not sure what you are exactly talking about, but definitely it gives a huge and strong reason to woman to look after herself and keep herself fit, wit, quick and fully energetic...:)

It depends on the situation:D.

Some older woman go out with younger man to make themeselves feeling sexy, younger and blah blah blah!! this type of Woman is uncontented)

But there are also older woman go out with younger man because they like them and there is this what you called "special" between them when they are together.

All i can say is: age does not matter as long as you are inlove with each other.... and also It is hard to go out with someone you do not like what more living with them!

QS - What's the big deal. I am married a woman 20 years older than me :)

Ban Spoon Feeding not Me

Do you think that older women go out with younger men to make themselves look/feel younger and attractive ?

I don't think kenyaqueen has doubts on what she has done.. she just wants to know what OTHER think about HER and about her husband..

me too.. i also want to know.. because some ppl tend to look for the "hidden" reason of such relationship .. "he definitely needs something from her"... but the truth is there is no any reason except of feelings… and maybe one more thing... except of excitement of committing something uncommon!

I personally never liked strict rules, certain patterns, routine… for me being in the relationship with the younger guy for almost2 years is like being beyond the routing, beyond the standard patterns… I really enjoy it.. how long it will last? Nobody knows, and I am fine with “as long as it lasts“ : 1 month, 1 year ,or to the rest of the life…

In many cultures, it is accepted for younger women to marry older men... There are many reasons... Firstly, as someone previously stated , it is do with child bearing..

Also, generaly, women tend to "mature" earlier then men.

I even read one article which said that older men like to marry younger women, because they can be easily "moulded"..(Not set in their ways)

As far as your posting, it is becoming more acceptable for older women to marry "toy boys" , specially in the West..

The problem to me is that younger men usually "think with their pecker".. If the woman is much older, then he may start looking elsewhere if she cannot meet his needs or begins to look too much older than him.

Oh! and do you think it is common with muslims men marrying older women? .....

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Not common.....

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Nintendo DS Lite

to kenyaqueen , dear if you are sure of what you did, you wouldn't have raised the issue. anyway good luck

Lol @ redpope, u so funny hehehe!

nefertiti, you my girl are so right on about older people thinking they are always right and know everything, I sometimes have to catch myself with my husband cause I forget sometimes that I have to let him think he knows more than I! lol

as long as you are so inlove with each other..

I am married to an old man, but i dont care i am proud to say that i love him eventhough double my age.. ;) but sometimes older partner seems to be pain in the arse they think they know everything because they are old enough, but not! they act like a child and they think like an abnormal.. (not generally) talking bout my partner! :P

i dont see any problem if older woman marry/marrying younger man, as long as the feelings are mutual then thats it... I prefer younger man too ;-) for me they are more exciting...

Do you know that Tarzan told Jane, those exact words "ya make the bed ya lie in it." when it got cold in a rainy day?

why bother what others say ?it's yr life and not their like they say - ya make the bed ya lie in it.......as long as the both of you are happy is what matters,

life's too short so make the most of it, you only live but once.......

I knew it because I have a few friends who are in the same situation as you. As long as the feeling is mutual, you'll be staying together.

One tends to adjust to each other age, either you set your mind being young and look younger than your age or your husband tries to catch-up with your age and generation. Anyway it goes, it's still perfect.

Lessen the reservations you have in your mind. If he married you in the first place, it means he loves you dearly.

"dgoodrebel will always be the rebellious good one"

I must say, its rather different, but hey as the worldly saying goes...there is no relation which doesnt have Honesty and Love ( Somebody told me this over the weekend...LOL!) so if you have got that, Learn to live in that moment fully and dont think too much...about what would happen to the future, cos then you might never end up cherishing the present...10 yrs down the lane, you wake up on a fine morning and look back, you might not find yourself in that...so dont worry too much and think too much...

As for the question goes, well, its different needless to say, cos Women mature faster, but then again, it falls to what I just said...you have Love and Honesty things will work out for the both...rather for anyone and Everyone...

Cheers!!!

kenyaqueen, i understand you perfectly, gal... ;)

and you are right about men going through different stages in their lives (as well as women actually).. Man in his 20s has different priorities, goals, and needs than a man in his 40-s...

so.. just enjoy the moment and be ready for the change any time...

if you want to talk about it more, you can PM me...;)

Older woman and younger man. Well look at Madonna, Demi Moore ect ..

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HE WHO DARES WINS

i believe it can't be judged by people reading only about it ... the only person that can judge such a relation is some1 who is actually experiencing it .. coz by nature human relations vary due to different backgrounds from which they come ... for example the background that i come from(Mid eastern, Muslim, Openminded) sees this as something thats not very common but could work .... personally from what i've read so far sounds like a real nice marriage

reagrds

Ok, I now know what the autumn years mean. I love the thought of not working and spending these years in the presence of my younger husband. But! I worry that my 16 years over him will eventually get in the way. I find men go through different stages in their lives. Given that he is so young I can't help but wonder if his mind will wander away from my affections. Any thoughts any one about any of the questions or comments?

uhmmm! I like that thought, Even if I don't know what it means, lol. I shall go look up that term/expression.

Judging by lifespans, it is probably better for a woman to marry a younger man. Better chance he'll be around in the august years :)

I really wasn't looking for this relationship, it just happened to jump right in my lap. I never really thought of younger men in the past. When I did dream of family life I always thought it would be with someone my own age. Well! maybe a little younger than I ! lol but not as young as this one

lol @ southland! your right on the first count

Either you like them that way or you are with the wrong man :P

men never grow up might as well goes to younger one. why not?????

Everybody is right everybody is wrong, it depend where you stand

Cougar ;)

Hi kenyaqueen :-)

I don't personally see anything wrong with an older woman marrying a younger man. as long as they are both in love and committed, and the guy isn't too young himself (as it's a fact men mature later than women!), then i think it's lovely!

I can see why in the Muslim culture, it may not be as common. I am not Muslim, but have a Middle Eastern culture, so our values are very much the same. Alot of Middle Eastern people see the woman as a bearer of children for their son, so this is naturally why they would prefer their son to marry a younger woman (sometimes significantly younger). I know that an older woman can obviously have children aswell, but I guess a younger woman for enhance the chances of a big family!

Thats my thought (not the last bit, just how people are!).

Sorry to waffle on, take care :-)