Rudeness
I've been living here for over 8 months and just when I'm about to think that it's not so bad living here, I'm reminded how much I miss civilization where common courtesy is not a rare commodity.
Let me ask you this: does wearing an abaya entitle you to cut in front of everyone in a line and lie outright when confronted? Do you think that because you're covered up that you can disregard common courtesy and etiquette? Good manners and integrity??
Yes, I'm singling out Arab women because I have yet to encounter such rudeness in others. Don't get me wrong--plenty of people tried to cut in front of me. However, at least they had the decency to apologize and get in line behind me...or wherever the line ends. But Arab women, in several instances, lied and said that they were waiting in line ahead of me. They may have been covered up but they sure weren't visible.
What gives? Is it so difficult to form a line and wait like everyone else??
Well I was trying not to get involved in this thread so I won't end up offending anyone. But I just want to say that it will take time for things to change here. Sadly, all those "rude" people weren't taught courtesy and manners, I think the ideology of superiority has been tattooed in their minds and it'll take a few experiences with other people for them to learn that they're not better than anyone. Cutting in line is just an example and has nothing to do with wearing an abaya, but has everything with the way they were brought up. Other examples include the outrageous driving, treating maids/drivers/labourers, talking to other people, and even treating the animals.
if someone tries to push me out of the line, i make sure to say it aloud that i was ahead of them and if that doesnt work and the cashier is planning to serve the other first after seeing that i was there before, then i nudge the other out of the way...and have a stern word with the casheir too.
jasmine, do the women's hospital send the pushers away?i did notice that befoe the number system had started the cashiers would make a mental note of who came first and no matter who pushed their way in, they would serve on first come first serve basis. this has happened couple of times, i couldnt push the big lady away :-D
happy heart
DRIVE SAFE,someone is waiting for you at home
If being pushed in lines bugs you I advise against a visit to the Womens' Hospital Outpatient Department. In fairness to the staff they do send the pushers away if they spot them.
i wont stop you - feeling nice :) night ;-)
stop me if you can I am logging off now too! my eye lid are closing now! I have to sleep now too! night! ;-)
Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig 2 graves...
JUST DON'T TRY TO CUT IN FRONT OF ME AS I AM GOING TO SLEEP OR I MAY HAVE TO BE RUDE ABOUT IT! lol
Me too! tired enough designing my space.com and friendster while chatting on boards. ;-)
Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig 2 graves...
Sleep is a weapon.
well its time to sleep. luckily there is no one cutting in line as i am dragging myself to bed or i would have to tell them off. well, i think i am feeling nice enough to be patient and let the person get in ;)
Not really! but if I ever lost my patient! I just keep it to myself, at least it won't do me any harm! If you ever notice me being sarcastic here? I've been drinking! at least I don't know most of people in this board, so I can't really imagine who's face I should get annoyed with hi! hi! hi! ;-)
Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig 2 graves...
I remember once going in to a barber's shop in Beirut for a haircut during the war years.
I'd already sat in the chair when a heavily-bearded and heavy-set guy sticks his head in the door and asks the barber to cut his hair. Barber says something like "the gentleman is sitting" and looks at me. I said no. So the guy looks at me and leaves.
Then the barber says you know who that was.
No.
He's the security chief for militia leader X.
Wow.
No, I'm no Rambo but I'm sure there's a moral somewhere in that story. And it's completely true.
I was brought up that way too. But I also believe a few courteous words when someone is rude is perfectly acceptable. It's a form of behaviour modification.
You sound way more patient than me:)
Politely telling someone that they are cutting in line is not considered a rude action. As a Starman, I would like to help improve the human race and I suggest that humans nicely advise each other when one does wrong.
Sorry I was brought up to give respect and not to be rude if it is not necessary! even somebody is trying hard to ruin me still try hard to keep myself calm as it won't take me anywhere to be rude in return to people who are brought up that way! ;-)
Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig 2 graves...
This is OUR planet. Countries have artificial borders and we should not let that keep us from exercising our right to our humanity. Rudeness should not be tolerated no matter where. However, we need to make sure we understand the culture we're in as it varies from one place to another. What is considered acceptable in one place may be taboo in another. Knowledge is power.
Mystica, disagree with you that you should not do anything because it is not your country. This is my country and I ask you to say something to rude people, wherever they come from. Otherwise they will not change. Maybe they won't listen to you but the seed will have been planted.
Doctors have more patience :) pun intended
i would say brits have this affection of queuing ... lol. They are queue freak if i may say.
Quite right! people tends to forget this is not our own country that we are strangers here. so bossing and pushing people around is not really necessary! learn to be patient and you'll soon find out the difference, people will appreciate you more! ;-)
Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig 2 graves...
But rudeness needs behaviour modification. I'm a woman of action. Can't stand it if someone pushes in front of me. I ALWAYS say something. Can't help myself. Must come from when I lived in the UK and learned all about queues, especially at the checkout of Marks and Spencers Food Hall on a Saturday morning!!!
you are correct. No one should feel better than others becuase of his/her skin color, social status, position, wealth, etc. People should be judged by their actions. Maybe adjusting to other cultures takes time. I will try
Funnily enough I never encounter anything like that during my stay in Middle East for almost 12 years! My own opinion People have to be patient as much as possible the fact that we are strangers here we do not have right to feel superior and we do not need to compete with people who are actually from here. ;-)
Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig 2 graves...
It will only change if people act and say something when it happens to them. We learned from our parents telling us how to behave didn't we? A couteous word or two will at least bring it to the persn's attention if it does not get as far as them snapping back into line!
Wow novita, way to go!
JJMB ... it is always happened to me ... especially if i am on my own doing my shopping in Lulu or Carrefour. Ppl think i am a maid trying to do shopping for my 'madam' :-). If there is a woman with an abaya try to push in the queue, i just tell the cashier if she dare to serve that woman first i will call the manager. And thats normally works. :-)
Line? What line? It's a free-for-all. Everything expands horizontally in the Arab world. It's sad and unfortunate and typical.
I have been here for about a month now and I have noticed a lack of courtesy from many segments of the society, be it women or men who cut in front of the line, drivers who think they always have the right of way, customers who think that the laborers and employees are lower form of humans, and the list goes on. Problems may be reaqlted to someone think his/her race/clothes/skin color/edcuation/etc is superior to others; or it could be due to frustration with the ineffeiecines encountered, or maybe just plain lack of respect. It seems to be a way of life for many, if not most. It is so bad that I am contemplating going back home where people are more courteous.
Sorry! to hear your experiencing this problem but this things fortunately never happens to me and to my family! So you cannot actually generalized them when you say women in Abaya as such! I have been in Oman and Saudi Arabia now here! I never feel bad about any of the locals where I've been and where I am now. but I have troubles before which is other nationality! but you cannot assume they are Arabs that they are not civilized!
In addition to that the reason there's a man and woman section is to make sure everyone gets treated well as fair. It sounds to me that you experienced this because there's no division between man and woman. well get used to it! in this society, woman has to be serve first than man to get them out of the way so man don't have the chance to see them for a long time and stare at them.
Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig 2 graves...