INTERESTING ABBREVIATIONS OF IT COMPANIES (funny)
WIPRO : Weak input, Poor & Rubbish output
HCL : Hidden Costs & Losses
TCS : Totally Confusing solutions
INFOSYS : Inferior Offline Systems
HUGHES : Highly useless Graduates hired for eating & sleeping
BAAN : Beggars Association & Nerds
IBM : Implicitly boring machines
SATYAM : Sad & tired yelling away madly
PARAM : Puzzled & ridiculous array of microprocessors
C-DOT : Coffee during office timings
AT & T : All Troubles & Terrible
CMC : Coffee, meals & comfy
Helpdesk : Have you tried pushing the button ?
Customer : Yes, but it's really stuck.
Helpdesk : That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note ...
Customer : No ... wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still on my desk... sorry .
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Helpdesk : Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen.
Customer : Your left or my left ?
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Helpdesk : Good day. How may I help you ?
customer : Hello... I can't print.
Helpdesk : Would you click on start for me and ...
customer : Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me ! I'm not Bill Gates damn it !
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Hi good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it...
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Customer : I have problems printing in red...
Helpdesk : Do you have a colour printer ?
Customer : No.
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Helpdesk : What's on your monitor now ma'am ?
Customer : A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket.
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Helpdesk : And now hit F8.
Customer : It's not working.
Helpdesk : What did you do, exactly ?
Customer : I hit the F-key 8-times as you told me, but nothing's happening.
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Customer : My keyboard is not working anymore.
Helpdesk : Are you sure it's plugged into the computer ?
Customer : No. I can't get behind the computer.
Helpdesk : Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
Customer : OK
Helpdesk : Did the keyboard come with you ?
Customer : Yes
Helpdesk : That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard ?
Customer : Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work !
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Helpdesk : Your password is the small letter a as in apple, a capital letter V as in Victor, the number 7.
Customer : Is that 7 in capital letters?
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A customer couldn't get on the internet.
Helpdesk : Are you sure you used the right password ?
Customer : Yes I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Helpdesk : Can you tell me what the password was ?
Customer : Five stars.
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Helpdesk : What antivirus program do you use ?
Customer : Netscape.
Helpdesk : That's not an antivirus program.
Customer : Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.
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Customer : I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screensaver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears !
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Helpdesk : Microsoft Tech. Support, may I help you ?
Customer : Good afternoon! I have waited over 4 hours for you. Can you please tell me how long it will take before you can help me ?
Helpdesk : Uhh..? Pardon, I don't understand your problem ?
Customer : I was working in Word and clicked the help button more than 4 hours ago. Can you tell me when you will finally be helping me ?
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Helpdesk : How may I help you ?
Customer : I'm writing my first e-mail.
Helpdesk : OK, and, what seems to be the problem ?
Customer : Well, I have the letter a, but how do I get the circle around it ?
coool man..like it
The pilot saw a tall building, flew toward it, circled, drew a handwritten sign, and held it in the helicopter's window. The pilot's sign said 'WHERE AM I?' in large letters. People in the tall building quickly responded to the aircraft, drew a large sign, and held it in a building window. Their sign said 'YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER.'
The pilot smiled, waved, looked at his map, determined the course to steer to SEATAC airport, and landed safely. After they were on the ground, the copilot asked the pilot how the 'YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER' sign helped determine their position.
The pilot responded 'I knew that had to be the MICROSOFT building because they gave me a technically correct, but completely useless answer.'
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