Swearing words

With a disciplined upbringing as mine, I pretend not to understand most of the colloquial swearing words in front of my parents. When I read that a certain Barnsley in South Yorkshire put spot fines for the potty mouth' I smiled. Now if the moderators would take the cue, some QLers would go bankrupt.

Back home it is a male domain. We women (urban) are well cultured folks (supposedly) who choose to bite our tongue just in time and pretend to act dumb when the men hurl the choicest ones on many occasions. It is considered macho and used liberally when discussing politics (understandable). 'Oh..we have tensions/stress - said a dear male cousin 'we need to relieve it and what better way than to utter those lovely gaalees (swear words) without getting into a fist fight.'
Yeah yeah tell me about it and how I felt at the nth hour delivering my baby ...the pretending smiling nurse and the pretending caring doc--- grrrr...you take the *beeeep* and the *beeep* and the *beeeeeeeeep*. *Beep* is like a self induced censorship due to the 'Dharma' training which insists on speech rigteousness.
I feel like that "n'th hour delivering baby" emotion many times in a day minus the heavy swearing. The soft ones come to rescue - lazy bones (nalayak), manhoos (one who brings ill luck).....My daring chaddi buddies (bum chums) back home use those starting with 'K' to bond(clue - Dharmendra paaji's favourite - a foul mouth Indian actor, now domesticated). In the school days we had those harmless ones - billions of blue blistering barnecles, wood lice, bashi bazouk ....inspired by Captain Haddock.

Recently,I was bamboozled to hear one of my female friend from across the border use the 'kameeni' (in a loving way)on other friend - okies they do it too - what a relief. Instinctively I knew I am not in her best buddy book cause she never did the 'kameeni' on me LOL.
So my manhoosoo any more soft not so offending ones in your dictionary for me to use . As my south indian friend would say --- bring it out Rascalas......
Dearest Fatima Aunty would have said 'Tauba tauba' crossing her fingers alternatively over her ears. Forgive me aunty I am a baddy bad.