A question to mothers who raised their kids
By heero_yuy2 •
...but most preferably to widowed, divorced, or single moms (but spouses may still participate in answering the question).
Did you mothers ever thought about personally planning what's best for the future of your child/children and raise them to that path? Or is it a father/man thing to think about future plans for their offsprings?
I just had a thought that maybe fathers have stronger set priorities and determination about what they want their child to be when they grow up than mothers, regardless to the gender of the child.
lobot, I agree with Formatted Soul ...
Fathers, being human, are not always right and do not always do what's best for their children. It is ALSO the duty of a wife/mother to do her best for her children, and that does not always involve blindly agreeing with her husband's wishes!
I think that while it may be preferable to have two parents raising a child, one can do it just fine.
And studies have shown that children raised by two gay/lesbian parents are just fine too.
Better to have no father/mother than to have one that is ill-equipped to contribute positively and consistently to the child.
"I wish I could drink like a lady. I can take one or two at the most. Three and I'm under the table. Four and I'm under the host"
-- Dorothy Parker
In education or in any thing else I find that both the Dad and Mom have their own SEPARATE roles to play, both equally imp , and mutually unavoidable. The absence of the involvement of one or both the parents will surely and definitely reflect as a life long personality DEFICIENCY in the child which may be expensive therapies might overcome to an extend.
You can be HOT or COLD to me, spare me LUKEWARM!!!!
The words that a father speaks to his children in the privacy of home are not heard by the world, but, as in whispering-galleries, they are clearly heard at the end and by posterity. ~Jean Paul Richter
lobot I pity your wife and kids:(
Its both father and mother who nourishes their offsprings future career..It doesn't mean that they should force their decision on their kids..Afterall,its all what their (kids) heart says at the end..We can just guide them for the correct path..Rest depends on their decision...I always wanted to be a DOCTOR but ended up in a COMMERCE field due to some unavoidable circumstances..Even my parents had this dream to see me in a WHITE COAT..But alas! destiny was having some other plans for me..And yes i m very successful in this (commerce) field as well and my parents r happy about it..At the end, parents r always happy to see their kids settled properly..
I think both parents have input, but as to choosing a career path, I think the child does that, you try to give them all the tools they need eg education, ability to think for themselves and then they do the rest, with the parents helping out/discussing with them what their options are as necessary.
(and doing the same thing myself), I think it's any parent's role to support their child to be happy and healthy until he/she reaches adulthood (when they can then take care of themselves inshallah!).
While it was always clear to me that I was expected to go to university (everyone in my family had, even my grandparents), my parents never pushed me towards studying one subject or another, taking one job over another...
I'll do the same for my child. If they want to become a farmer, doctor, beautician, soldier, whatever....as long as it makes them happy, I will support their choice.
"I wish I could drink like a lady. I can take one or two at the most. Three and I'm under the table. Four and I'm under the host"
-- Dorothy Parker
the father knows best for the family...the duty of the wife is to listen and agree his husband's decision and take care the children and everything goes right....
To be honest, I think both parents want what's best for their child. I don't think it matters whether you make this decision alone or jointly, because your child's best interest's are usually at heart (in most circumstances anyway).
*****If you haven't got anything nice to say, don't say anything at all*****
i have seen certain cases where parents get divorced for their selfishness and in the end the kids suffer bcoze they may not get equal love and affection from father or mother. its the duty of both the parent to give proper care to their kids as both of them are equally responsible for thier kids future.
It was my mom who brought us up, my Dad passed away when I was a kid. Mothers got an important role in bringing up a child, it reflects in his/her personality when they grow up.
well, he did say he preferred divorced, widowed and single mom's POV but also pointed out fathers may respond as well..
Oops sorry I am still sleepy I guess..
**** Aal Izz Well****
whyteknight, why not..
in terms of career path, i can only give advice to my child on what i think would be best for her, but the decision will still be hers..
when the children are grown up in most cases father decide or advise his children what career path they should choose.
Now a days, children they follow their own path. Everything is so advanced that during their school time they can decide which field to choose for their future career.