Humour

Teacher: Ted, if your father has $10 and you ask him for $6, how much would your father still have?

Ted: $10.

Teacher: You don't know Maths.

Ted: You don't know my father!

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Mother: David, come here.

David: Yes, mom.

Mother: You really disappoint me. Your results are getting worse.

David: But I will only get my report book tomorrow.

Mother: I know that, but I'm going Hong Kong tomorrow so I'm scolding you now.

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Father: Why did you fail your Mathematics Test?

Son: On Monday, teacher said 3 + 5 = 8

Father: So?

Son: On Tuesday, she said 4 + 4 = 8. On Wednesday, she said 6 + 2 = 8.

If she can't make up her mind, how do I know the right answer?

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Girl: Do you love me?

Boy: Yes Dear.

Girl: Would you die for me?

Boy: No, mine is undying love

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Man: How old is your father?

Boy: 1 year older then me

Man: How can that be?

Boy: He became a father only when I was born

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Teacher: Simon, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?

Simon: No, teacher. It's the same dog!

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Father: Your teacher says she finds it impossible to teach you anything!

Son: That's why I say she's no good!

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Teacher: Where were you born?

Student: Singapore, Sir.

Teacher: Which part?

Student: All of me, Sir.

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Teacher: How come you do not comb your hair?

Ah Kow: No comb, Sir.

Teacher: Use your dad's then.

Ah Kow: No hair, Sir.

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A boy came home from school with his exam results.

"What did you get?" asked his father.

"My marks are under water," said the boy.

"What do you mean 'under water'?"

" They are all below 'C' (sea) level!"