Re-open the Arab men and Western women topic
Having had my wife sexually harrassed (AGAIN) for the god knows how many time I have come to the conclusion after living in Qatar for nearly two years that -
1. Arab men (not all so dont berate me for this) do not have the common inteligence to differentiate between shows such as Sex in the City, Desperate housewives etc and REAL LIFE!
2. Such perverts should be caught and castrated!
3. The police do absolutely nothing about these CRIMES so dont bother even reporting them unless you have the number plate, mans name, chest size, what he was wearing down to the exact type of stitching on his thobe and length of beard
4. Need educating
For those arab men reading this, learn one thing, if a western woman walks by do not stare, they are not there for your amusement or sexual relief. More over, if she is with her husband expect to either get shouted at or stared back at!
The support for such instances happening is pathetic, it is going to get back to the point of rumour mills where women HAVE BEEN RAPED IN QATAR, but as per the press it is covered up and nothing further heard (other than the fact that the man in question got away with it).
Word of warning for all women reading this, it does happen on an all to often occurence, never mind reporting the driving (which we all know is terrible, why, because they are not taught, there is no way of stopping them or penalising them so they get away with it) PAY ATTENTION TO THE REGISTRATION PLATE NUMBER and start getting these sick f***ing perverts off the street!!!!!!!!!!
Honestly iev never heard of any western women that got rapped here, but I do agree 100% with your post.
so no need to be scared.
This thread is about four years old. The last posting is dated August 2008. Today is almost June 2012. How is this harrassment issue nowadays? I am just about to go there for work. I am coming from the US. My wife and my 3-year-old son will join me in a few months. What should we expect today, six to four years after this thread was discussed?
I would appreciate your input on this issue.
Kindest Regards.
Well I DID NOT READ ALL THE POSTING BUT FROM TOP WOT I READ...LET ME GET THIS CLEAR... BUTTERFLY AND TRUTH 321...IF YOU DO ENCOUNTERS THAT SORTA INCIDENTS YOU CAN REPORT TO POLICE...BECAUSE THEY HAVE EVERY ONES FINGERS PRINTS....SO EASY TO GET CAUGHT UNLESS LIKE IN UK....PEOPLE WHO DO THIS ARE MOSTLY QATARIS...OTHER PEOPLE LIKE ASIAN...THEY WOULD NOT DO SUCH THINGS COZ THEY BE TOO SACRED WOT IF THEY GET THROWN OUT OF COUNTRY ETC...
IM BRITISH MYSELF REASON I KNOW ABIT OF THIS COUNTRY I WAS BRON AND BROUGHT UP ERE AND LEFT AT 14-15 TO GO BAK TO UK FOR AND IM BACK FOR JOB AND...I DONT SEE WOT I USED TO SEE ABOUT THIS COUNTRY...PEACEFUL...
HOPE THIS HELPS YOU LOT...
REGARDS...
IVE BEEN BLESSED 4 HAVIN U IN MY LYF, IF I HAD THE CHANCE I WUDN'T HESITATE 2 MAKE U MY WIFE.
what i really find it un-normal in all of these stories
how the ladies know that men are arab
they saw thier ID or what
really i meet today at work white man with green eyes and blond hair
and when i asked him about his nationality he replied (I am Indian)
and i am arabic man since 35 but in many cases i can't be sure from the nationality of the ppl when i meet them
if they are arabic or pakistanian or turkish or indian
at all really i feel sorry that some ppl do such attuide regardless that the nationality
may be the government should really find solution for that
such an amazing topic. I didn't expect Indians to be so perverted.
In Japan, it's a HUGE issue. 30% of women have been harassed, sexual abused, raped, or simply been involved in an indecent act due to perverts. (Hentai)
However in Japan, women do not fight back and usually hope for the situation to just get over and done with, so the guy usually feels a woman up and plays with her until he's done. Made me so angry to read and actually hear about this.
Half my female Japanese friends had bad things happen to them in their country.
The most strangest thing (you can find videos of) are these perverts in public places who would ejaculate on women and run away. Unbelievable.
__________________________
Can women carry mace/pepper spray? Is this allowed in Qatar? Can you bring it in? Can you buy it? Or how about carrying perfume or some type of spray that if they don't leave you alone, you spray them in the eyes. Will you get in trouble for that?
I am an ARAB but i totally agree that if Arab guys stare at my wife i will probabky wnna kill them too. Dude let's ust put it this way ...if u got in a fight with one of these ARABS i would be on u're side 100 %, i don't care where u're from . I hate it when guys look at my woman and i almost got into a fight because of it recently. The only reason why Arab guys look at u're wife is because they think u as her husband don't care .....if u give them a stern look and make it clear that u do care they will back down....unless u're dealing with real thugs ...in which case they may not and u may have to go as far as saying "What the hell r u looking at !!"
trust me show no fear ...we as Arabs know we are doing something wrong ...so we feel guilty especially if the husband gets upset. Whatever u do and this is an international rule...never show weakness or let people sense u're afraid ...if a guy stares at u're wife and u pretend u don't notice he'll do it more .....if u stand up for u'rself he will back down.
generally i can say that alot of the repliers have bad impressions about Arabs' or indians' or any others' behaviours in this topic.I think if we like to do some thing we should start improving the people around us and providing the right info to them to be able to protect them selves from any similar problems. even if they came from their countries at low education,I beleive they will follow the local culture in the new country.
please let us discover the white things in these people, it will work very will to stop the matter.
I was told by a friend ,definitely you will not get an approval from the concerned official be cause they dont want others to know what they are doing indoors.
I wanted to introduce for health reasons,but i was disappointed when i heard people will use for different purposes.
Not even in myh wild dreams I had thought these things
First, I was just talking to a national who doesn't even like his cousin coming for a visit because the cousin ogles the women in his own family. He described it as his cousin having "bad eyes." So it does happen among the Qataris that Qatari women are demeaned and made to feel uncomfortable by men and it certainly can't be because of their "provocative dress."
Second, I just bought a new phone with video capabilities--in part to gather evidence of any sort of attack that I may come across in the future. I have the video camera on one of the quick buttons so I can start filming in a second and I practice how to start capturing video so I don't have to fumble through the menus when something actually happens. Without evidence, nothing will ever be done. With evidence, you can share the facts with the police, or with YouTube: their (the authorities') choice.
Dear All,
As a man I am deeply shocked but not surprised at this unwanted and disgraceful behaviour by these particular types of men. I have worked in the Middle East for many years in the security role on various residential compounds so I am fully aware to what your fears and concerns are. I wish to ask have any of these incidents occurred on the Al Khor community compound (Qatargas)?
If so I wish to ask for everyone’s help as I am due to come out to Qatar to work by the end of July 07 in the new security team, where I can be reached if needed, to protect the residents of said community but I would more than happy to extend our security procedures and advise to all whom wish to adopt it for the common good.
I assure you I have more than enough experience in countering this type if incidents with a 100% success rate and this will stop.
Regards,
Nicc G.
I know this is an old thread, but as a long time lurker I've been MIA from QL for a while.
This is a subject that I have a great deal of experience in. As a young(ish) western woman i can not remember the last time I went any where and did not recieve unwanted attention. I won't speculate as to why this is because I wouldn't dream of casting aspersions on any group of people but the fact of the matter is it happens. Because I'm western and don't cover I seem to be fair game. Whilst most western men might give you a glance over (and hey lets face it that can work both ways) I have to say, that sadly, its the locals and, for lack of a more appropriate term, non western ex pats, that do it. In my experience the indians ect tend to just stare (which is not pleasant)the boldest do seem to be arab men. On one occasion I was followed from the car park of the centre to the car park of the Inercon. This was in the middle of the day on a friday. I wasn't in any way improper or "encouraging" as it was only when I got near the hotel that I realised that it wasn't just a coincidence, they were following me. It was made more apparent when they pulled into the parking space next to me and sat and stared as me as I got my gear out of my car. I have been explicitly propositioned on more than one occasion. As a teacher of older students its something that came up in the course of discussion as a hypothetical. Is it ok to say things to a woman because she does not cover?? Scarily, the answer (from one of the nicest and most respectful boys in the class) was "Yes". It was only wehen I personalised it and asked if it was ok for things to be said to me that the boy became horrified. Where does this mindeset come from???
Whilst I would never dream of generalising and in my exerience the majority of qatari/other arab men are nothing but rspectful, it CANNOT be denied that there seem to be a significant percentage for whom western women (and probably any woman who doesn't cover) are nothing but sport.
in so far,
noone has mentioned homosexual gestures yet?
when i was a teenager, I used to run track for my High Schools and I would repeatedly get stopped by cars looking to give me a lift when i'd go jogging (practice drill 4 times a week) (maybe because I was in shorts lol)!
Sexual Abuse is chameleon like and transcends gender boundaries here. Anyone have any experiences related to mine?
Ive had two of my male freinds physically raped and the police did not do much about it.
Don't let one man's dream become another's nightmare
in so far,
noone has mentioned homosexual genstures yet?
when i was a teenager, I used to run track for my High Schools and I would repeatedly get stopped by cars looking to give me a lift when i'd go jogging (practice drill 4 times a week) (maybe because I was in shorts lol)!
Sexual Abuse is chameleon like and transcends gender boundaries here. Anyone have any experiences related to mine?
Ive had two of my male freinds physically raped and the police did not do much about it.
Don't let one man's dream become another's nightmare
Wow - some proper hostility at the moment. But lets get realistic, wherever you are, be it in the West, Middle East or Asia women are going to get harassed. Doha is not the little town it was a few years ago, it's becoming a major city. And with that comes increased crime and delinquency. It is inevitable. Yeah, women do get harrassed and I am by no means condoning it but it happens all over the world. Tell me the difference between a women getting stared at in a shopping centre by an Asian/Arab and getting stared at in a bar by a Brit or American? Not much if you ask me.
And should anything further happen then security/police should be called. But there is no point swearing at people, because if they make a complaint you are in the wrong. You may not like it, but it's true.
Dont want to sound like an a$$ but accept that there is a huge amount of third world mentality here, i.e. men are superior. But getting offensive and angry won't help you.
Peace.
I used to get aggressive when guys in Qatar were drooling over my girlfriend when we were out. But actually it's only the Arabs now who I have no patience for as they have the opportunities to be with a woman and live like a human being that low paid workers don't. I feel sympathy for the low paid workers, many who are married with children back home, who are now stuck in Qatar as a bachelor because they can't afford to bring their family or qatari law won't let them bring their family. If he wants to sneak an innocent look at my girlfriend, I have learnt to accept that. Hell if I was in their shoes I would look too, and EVERYONE of the ladies husbands on this forum would also look.
If you want to blame somebody, blame the government as their methods of exploiting the lower class would create a disfunctional society anywhere, east or west.
I was just in Nepal last month and guess what, not a single Nepalise was ogling and rude to any woman. They are very generous, respectful and expressive, if given the opportunity.
I guess it should be "doha a dangerous place for all women"
i have been living in doha since i was 6 years old till now and i have observed the bad manners of those arabian n indian ppl (not all of them) but at least most opf them ... but i have a point of view, I'm not with them but instead of asking my self wut r they doing?
i changed the question to how they became doing this?
For an example: anybody of u try to keep about 3 days without eating (eating is also a desire) then let somebody just pass with a piece of cake (or even sh*t) wut u gonna do? if u didn't try to take it by force at least u will be looking with desire ...
Actually that wut is happening with those ppl, They lived their life without having girls or ladies in life .. schools r separated, girls in street always covered from head to toe, no girls at work and even they were getting married without even seeing the bride b4 marriage ...
WHAT DO U EXPECT FROM THEM?
Wut do expect from a hungry ppl when they see a delicious food (or even if it wasn't delicious) ... when i was in a mall i saw qatarian guys r looking to a lady wearing black dress covering her face her hands and her all body and they keep looking n smiling ... wut r u looking at... but their desire get raised to be seeking for any female (may be female dog too) ... but that's not bcuz they r bad guys but bcuz they grown up within the very restricted manners ..
Western ladies: (or any lady) I know that it is disgusting and abusing u and u have the right to defense ur self and u gotta watcha back.. don't be fear of them .. Don't just look to them from up to down ..they will misunderstand this .. raise ur voice ..shout at them even if any body tried to touch u slap his face...
There is 2 ways to teach camels even by carrot or stick but i guess you are out of carrots and it didn't work ..so use the stick ...
For indians it is much worst that i wouldn't talk or give an attention or i'll lose my temper n banned from this site...
***** Very Important: Again I'm saying that's not for all arabs and indians, still there is a good men of them and i have dealed with them n found them really very kindly ...
thanks, I apreciate your comments - got a bit of a fright yesterday when reading the whole debate as I don't drive and have two young kids therefore would be seen as an easy target
Compared to the US cities. This place is real nice and quiet.
"Am I therefore become your enemy, because I tell you the truth?"
Gal. 4:16
By all standards Doha is not a dangerous place. Yes, harrassment is just a nasty rutine but it really only happens when you walk by yourself. And at this point, I'm used to it, it does not scare me, only annoys me and embarrass me in a way.
Most stores and malls are safe. Same with Clubs and Hotels. And residential areas are much better than where I live, right in the heart of Doha where many single mens are hanging out.
I'd like to think that the incident was a one-off. I had people knocking on my door, mostly to ask for money for charity but I don't open ever since, I just tell them to go away and they usually do.
You made m giggle there thank you! You put what i wanted to but wasnt brave enough! Im debating wether to buy an abaya or not. Netty it is very common here for women to be harrassed by the men out here, sadly very common. You do kind of learn to deal with it, but it does make life very stressfull out here. I cant think of any other negatives aimed just at women out here! Its just unfair that as ladies we have to deal with the harrasment, but then i guess its no different than what a women wearing the full abaya would recieve in the UK nowadays, but at least there the police may do something about it!
Dear Butterfly
I am sorry to hear about your horrific experience. I am presently searching the net to find out all I can about life in Qatar.My husband has been offered a job and if all goes well myself and my two young kids would join him in a few months however on reading your comments and the whole debate on this subject how fearful should I be, you have stayed in Qatar after this incident. Should I take from this that you feel this was a one off incicdent and a recurrence of such an incident is unlikely?and are there any other negatives to females living in Qatar that you feel I should know about.
I'm finding your suggestion very rude actually, since you wrongly assume that we walk around Doha "flashing our boobs" then I can presume that you are ugly as a dog, hence you don't get much unwanted attention.
Terramax, hats off to your wife...but wearing a abaya and a hijab is really not an option for some of us...I'd much rather put up with it..;
That is just F**ing great to hear that women getting harassed over there. I'm thought there is none of that S**t over there. Since the Cops wouldn't do anything, what if I slap somebody on the face? would the Cop then react?
My wife went yesterday to souk to buy abaya and hijab (we are going to travel through Saudi by car, so it's required). As it was windy she just decided to put it on. She said she was amazed by the attitude change. Nobody was staring at her anymore, and even when crossing the street, cars stopped to let her cross. Later on she said that in this dress she felt a sort of protection, and she intends to keep on putting it on when she goes out without me. As crazy as it sounds it might be a solution for someone.
I support you and agree with you in that one.
"Am I therefore become your enemy, because I tell you the truth?"
Gal. 4:16
You could always carry with you Ms. Smith and Weson, Mr. Berreta, Mr. Tauros, Mr. glock, Ms. Winchester, Mr. Colt or the old fashion cocobolo stick or a nice sharp knife. Just kIdding.
Just kidding. I know there is strict laws in Qatar for purchase and ownership of weapons.
"Am I therefore become your enemy, because I tell you the truth?"
Gal. 4:16
now i am dissappointed :-(
i will try to chase the 5 and keep the one lone man standing for you to work on.
hows that?
happy heart
drive safe cos someone is waiting for u at home
I do suggest you are not ASSUMING my wife brought it upon herself by wearing revealing clothing!!!
My wife dress's very moderatly down to the point of long sleeved tops and trousers.
I do agree that many women walk around in spaghetti string tops and short skirts and both myself and my wife thing this is a slap in the face for the locals. However I agree with Charmed that no woman brings this upon herself.
Its like assuming that all western women have blonde bobbed hair, wear blue tops, white peddle pushers and are dripping in gold jewelery that their husbands bought them...not forgeting the fact that they live a hectic life sipping tea round a friends house.
For those of you who took down my number i am sorry to say i injured my ribs yesterday training with one of my deadliest teamates so if the number of guys harassing you is more than 6 people then you are on your own, if its less than 6 then i can still be effective so waiting for your call.
Disclaimer: 6 people are assumed to be average height and weight with no combat training or experience. If AHMAD44 decides to bail out in the middle of the situation then you are not entitled to a refund. Due to busy scheduling the person sent to save you might infact NOT be AHMAD44 but another affiliated person of the same caliber. Other person may bail out also and AHMAD44 will not be responsible for refunds.
Yorkie, many thanks for your comments. However as a western women who get hassled here almost everyday, and I mean men in cars making lurid comments, men following me home and then ringing my doorbell, men thinking they can make sexual gestures at me, men trying to box me in an road and get me in there car forcefully, men trying to run my car off the road. I can tell you I DO NOT WALK AROUND SHOWING MY MIDRIFF OR BOOBS. I am always covered head to toe, in the baggiest trousers and the baggiest tops, so when you say what goes around comes around then you are wrong. I am not one of these women who walk around in short skirts or spaghetti strap tops I do not flaunt myself. I respect this coutries rules more than most people out here walk around the malls yourself and you will see. What do I do to deserve this attention? What does any of us women do to deserve this attention NOTHING. So I suggest you retract your comments about what goes around comes around. None of us women deserve this attention, why do we have this attention? Because the media and televison portray us western women as easy! And is this true? Well go out in the UK for a night and watch the desperation on some ( not all please im English) womens faces, look at how STDs are rising in the western world, look how many marriages break up through affairs it’s a very very sad world which we are living in today. But please people lets stop judging each other here because of our skin colour, our race or our sex. At the end of the day we are all human so we are all the same. Let us all try and remember that we are all the same, and all men who are reading this if any of you guys are the ones who do these things, please just remember each of these women who you are doing this too could be your sister or your mother so stop and get a grip.
Ahmad44
The caliber of person that you are. Don't need to be doing that. No one has giving me any answers to my questions.
I've been here 15 months and haven't had any problems - no, I'm not a dog but, unless I'm out with my husband, I do dress modestly - don't flash my boobs and mid-drift! I do get stared at by bus loads of workers but so what - it aint gonna hurt me. I've found that the Qatari gents I deal with are gentlemen, polite and helpful.
Maybe what goes around comes around, if we as outsiders act as though everybody should be bending over backwards to accommodate us, instead of us sticking to the very simple rules they lay down in Qatar about dress, drink driving etc.then people are going to start disrespecting us.
As for balding, middle age western blokes with money, who wouldn't stand a chance with somebody equal, let's not go there!!
My mobile is 5551594 and if you mention you are from the qatarliving website i will make the first beatup for free!
have i been in mars or what????? i cant believe all this happens in qatar..
but i really dont think pointing fingers is goin to stop the menace.. maybe everyones to blame.. irrespective of the race or nationality those who want to do it will do it.. being a guy this is my style.. any guy mess with my girl, he's gonna know i mean business.. as 4 all you woman out there show them perverts what you can do.. most them think they are on the top of things. show them they are not and they never will be.
we are all here to make a living.. and no ones gonna eat from our plate.. all you guys out there who have grown those brass balls to treat a woman wrong, remember brass was never good enough. yank one fellow and believe me the word will spread.. soon perverts will know that perversion better end in the loo and not go beyond..
i just cant believe some gals saying keeping quite is the best option.. in this world no change was never brought by silence..
even after all this testerone i am still in shock.. i mean dont all of them have a mother and sisters????
definitely novita.....
let the weather get a bit stable then we shall.
b'fly will start work next month.
enjoy the opening ceremony
happy heart
drive safe cos someone is waiting for u at home
Hv a nice weekend too ... :-) Shame we still haven't met. Probably next outing with the kids you can join us. xxx
none taken novita......
have a nice weekend.
happy heart
drive safe cos someone is waiting for u at home
Talking abt the driving ... this afternoon i took my son to Mc.D in C ring road before starting his tae kwon do class. Then when we head back to the C ring road ... it was so buuuussssyyyy .... with my tiny car no one let me out to the main road :-(. And this Qatari guy with big land cruiser slowing down, flash his head light and wave his hand asking me to pull out. I pull out and the Indian looking driver try to overtake the landcruiser in his pick up and nearly hit me ....
PS: And indian member in Qatarliving.com pls no pun intended.
ahmed44.....give me the number...another number to store on my mobile.....for emergencies.....i just hope i dont need to use it ever.
too tired for any feedback today.
have a great weekend.
happy heart
drive safe cos someone is waiting for u at home
Most qataries that I have come across are gentlemen, respectful and have impecable manners...(well, except when they drive!) I don't want anyone who reads this thread to be under the impression that qataries are disrespectful to women. It's many male expatriates, arab, indian, or any other nationality, that give shame to this country.
As for your number :P post it! It's always helpful to call a martial arts expert ready to go and get the ladies out of trouble, 24/7!!!
I say just call me 24/7 whenever you are even looked at funny, you have nothing to lose, and Hamad hospital has everything to gain from fixing the bodies i will send there.
Film it and post it on Youtube so others can see an example of what happens when i mean business.
PS: for privacy i will be wearing a ski-mask during the beating.
I agree with Truth...so many people over here have this mentality that women from the West are actually what they watch on television. That is why "Western Women" wearing "Western clothing" get hounded..it's because these men somehow believe they actually have a chance of dating them. Even Arab men have this vision of Western Women and when they come to Canada...they really embarass us all...
They think these women would actually desire this kind of attention, unfortunately they haven't realized that these women didn't just walk out of a Hollywood drama. Sure they may not be covered head-to-toe but they are still dignified women who deserve respect.
This forum is a Melting pot of opinions and statements, got real crazy and very interesting.
But nothing much has being spoken about the local Laws.
Every one came up with mechanism of defense, experiences and some legal roads to follow.
Where is the credential of the law?
What are the specifics laws on this matter about sexual assault, harassment and molestation in Qatar?
What agencies to reach over in case of a situation merge?
What kind of criminal system is on place already to protect the rights of the victim and the accused one?
What to do properly in case of a sexual harassment, assault, or molestation?
Calling the police is not enough in my opinion.
In my opinion we need to pamper ourselves with the truth of the law in Qatar.
Let’s lift this course and taboo with legal knowledge.
Knowledge is power.
This forum is a Melting pot of opinions and statements, got real crazy and very interesting.
But nothing much has being spoken about the local Laws.
Every one came up with mechanism of defense, experiences and some legal roads to follow.
Where is the credential of the law?
What are the specifics laws on this matter about sexual assault, harassment and molestation in Qatar?
What agencies to reach over in case of a situation merge?
What kind of criminal system is on place already to protect the rights of the victim and the accused one?
What to do properly in case of a sexual harassment, assault, or molestation?
Calling the police is not enough in my opinion.
In my opinion we need to pamper ourselves with the truth of the law in Qatar.
Let’s lift this course and taboo with legal knowledge.
Knowledge is power.
This forum is a Melting pot of opinions and statements, got real crazy and very interesting.
But nothing much has being spoken about the local Laws.
Every one came up with mechanism of defense, experiences and some legal roads to follow.
Where is the credential of the law?
What are the specifics laws on this matter about sexual assault, harassment and molestation in Qatar?
What agencies to reach over in case of a situation merge?
What kind of criminal system is on place already to protect the rights of the victim and the accused one?
What to do properly in case of a sexual harassment, assault, or molestation?
Calling the police is not enough in my opinion.
In my opinion we need to pamper ourselves with the truth of the law in Qatar.
Let’s lift this course and taboo with legal knowledge.
Knowledge is power.
motivated comment..
I do agree with some of the observations about the tendenceis of men from certain countries having staring probs, engaging in sexual harassment,etc. Certain types of women, unfortunately, are considered 'fair game' for them. It not only happens to Western women in South Asia, but South Asian women wearing westernized clothing. And it happens to fairly ugly white girls as well. So it's not necessarily something about beauty, but about how the culprit perceives the sexuality of the victim.
But we'd have to be a bit more accurate and understand that we are not getting a random sample of people from a certain country. From South Asia, we are getting large numbers of the lower class and lower-middle class. Single, poor men, without access to women. Moreover, there are attractive women around them, but they have no ability to engage them because of a variety of reasons, including class, income, racial, and language barriers.
Let's say you were in NY, and you took out the white people, except for the construction workers. Now, NY construction workers are 100X worse than the laborers here. Should we use experiences with them to make conclusion about white males?
Should we start a thread about white men and non-Western women? About how nerdy white guys get rent a brides from the developing world or go elsewhere for "sex tourism" and molest little children? Are other factors involved, like wealth? I think it's fair to make cultural assumptions/conclusions -- but let's not reduce our analysis to a single factor.
get back to the real issue and stop drifting off.
"Truth" had a serious issue with sexual harrasement and very few of the coments were constructive.
I will contact a guy I know works in "Public Prosecution" and he should have a solution.
One thing I know for sure that Qatari Men who come from respectable families, rarely put themselves in such situations, but again there's always an exception to the rule.
my 50p'w worth!!!!
peace terramax...nobody is looking for an insult......i asked for clarification...bcos somewhere i felt i maybe got the word's meaning wrong............dont get my reason for explanation as something other than a request for explanation.
i agree with dvrgas.
bbk will come tomorrow with an idea of a hi-tech bus which all of us ladies can use...it will be fully equipped with high security, body gaurds,cameras,creep sensors,pervert sensors,other sensors which he can think of.......... the works, to keep the ladies safe.
going by how bbk thinks...u can just replace the body gaurds with robots...for extra security.
Totally agree Dvargas
Okay lets all be friends...and I said the illiterate thing...it was me. Lets just hate me. hehe.
But, I really liked this discussion and I think everyone has valuable input so lets keep it civil and keep it going.
Take Good Care All and wheres BBK when you need him?
good night *)
Han19: I don't understand WHY are you so upset with the word guttural. Please look it up in the dictionary, before stirring a tempest in a glass of water.
gut‧tur‧al [guht-er-uhl] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
–adjective 1. of or pertaining to the throat.
2. harsh; throaty.
3. Phonetics. pertaining to or characterized by a sound articulated in the back of the mouth, as the non-English velar fricative sound [kh] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation.
–noun 4. a guttural sound.
What for generalisation like "The rest of India is filled with illiterates" - you said it, not me. I don't know what India is filled with, I am talking about labourers vs educated indian professionals in Qatar. For some reason highly paid educated indians are clear skin indoeuropeans, and low wages labourers in camps are dravids from south. Of course there are exceptions, but this is a fact which has nothing to do with me.
We have same problem in Brazil, where poor uneducated people mostly come from african origin, and educated professionals of european. There are many exceptions, and situation is changing, as the whole society recognizes it and tries to revert it.
Stop looking for an insult in everything what is said, it shows your insecurty about your origins.
I guess cowboy attitude hardly helps anyone. First pout a set of general insults,insist that its gospel truth and then act upset when its contested.Terra needs to get some class.
Quiet lurker. Poor Contributer
honey.....we have been dealing with it all along...until this subject came up on this forum.now we are all discussing it....dont know where it is going though.
terramax stated "they all are dark skinned, smelly in strange clothes and speaking gutural language.
I for myself can recognize only northern indians with fair skin and almost european look. But again, they are mostly educated professionals and are not of that ilk."
its understandable what you recognise and you dont need to take a tour of india for that.everyone is free to their opinion and criticism. but dont u think u have one too many assumptions in your own statement.
pls dont get offensive or defensive about it either.
we have not been criticisng by sections of the country...we mentioned as is.........my experience has been indians guys acting funny around me.....
whats upsetting is your mention of gutural language...smelly in strange clothes and north indians mostly educated professionals.do u mean the rest of india is filled with illiterates.
explain gutural language...maybe i understand it wrong.
happy heart
drive safe cos someone is waiting for u at home
its not fare to blame a community of nationality for bad things done by a very few . in all the communities, there are good and bad people. i could find few posting s here which blames others to justify one community.
I also believe that the reason for all these bad things are
1. Lack of proper education
2. The situation, the family, the society where he brought up
Generally, men like pretty women. But it doesnt or it should not be harrasing or teasing them. But should not harrase or torture them. Just think about our mother and sisters at home, then we will never think of doing any thing bad to a women.
There are few bad people in all kinds of community. But i believe that if the government decides, they can stop or atleast they can reduce those types of incedents by imposing strict rule.
but most of the time, the police is biased towards some community. first they should be fare and good in dealing. they should know their duty. they should do the justice.
Qatexpat: It not about disagreeing with me. Everybody is entitled to his own opinion. I "get on defencive" only when I am accused of racism.
In any other country I would have simply taken the accuser to the court. In Brazil to be a racist or to accuse anyone of being a racist is a serious crime which can take you to a jail.Here my only recourse is to reply.
But you are right, I should get a life. Let them find out themselves who is horny and who is smelly. Just keep us posted.
everyone let's just deal with it
I just dont understand, why so many people arguing hard about the nationality, how do u even know where they are from? any flags on their clothes..? just beware around u to not having any sexual attack by the others, it's complicated here!
Hello,
Plz, can only 1 tell me more about the life in qatar. i am a graduate of chemical/Polymer Engineering, i wanted or plaaning to come to qatar. In there a prospect there and how can i secure job in qatar.
A lot of thanks
Kuti Y O
ESL teacher: can you read again what I wrote? I said I (for myself) can only distinguish Northern indians from the rest of the crowd. The rest looks the same to me. (And it still does).
All the deductions and implications are not mine. But may be they recognized themselves in this description and therefore got upset.
Whenever anyone disagrees with Terramax, he tends to get on the defensive !!! And keeps repeating "get a life" !!! Mind you, here the posts only disagreed with him, but he turned it around as some sort of counter-attack. Actually I was going to respond to his "strong" post, but I knew what the response would be, so I kept quiet.
Anyway, he is entitled to his own view as everyone else is, so no need to get defensive, no need to counterattack those who disagree with you !!!
Reminds me of one gentleman who said sometime back "You are either with us or against us !!!"
Terramax relax...sheesh bad day? It was just that your post was implying ALL South Indians were dirty smelly illiterates...c'mon that is definately going to upset them.
Ok, labourers behave like gentelemen, they take a shower and shave every day, and all of them fair skinned, and if I see a thousand, I will remember them all and can just by looking at them which valley and creek of subcontinent they come from. Happy now? The pride of India restored?
You all are hypocrites, my dear indians. You can criticize your countrymen as much as you want, but when an outsider says something about you guys, you start attacking them (same as it was in the discussion about drivers).
All I said is that we are unable to distinguish between Bangladeshi, Nepali, Indian etc. Same as Chinese are unable to distinguish Europeans, or we Chinese.
The discussion was not about how great your country is (I have seen it, don't worry), the discussion was about asian workers, and you yourself suggested that it were not arabs who present danger for women but indians. And they (laboures from subcontinent) are smelly indistinguishable crowd.
Like jews who can say anything about themselves, but whoever say something about jews is immediately accused of antisemitism, you are absolutely the same way. Too ready to scream "racist". Get a life.
There is no solution...It's not even that dangerous, apart from that experience, I have not feared for my safety in Doha...it's just so bloody annoying and there isn't much that can be done about it...one of those annoyances of living here, just like crazy drivers or hot summers, you can complain about it but you cannot do anything to change it...
You just have to learn to live with it. And for every rude idiot you come across in the streets there are lots of wonderful and well educated people around.
But I won't give up my daily strolls or change the way I dress & behave. I, just like every other woman here, just have to keep learning how to deal with it.
whats the solution?
we have complained enough and i have given my piece of advice to b'fly..its applies to other women strolling alone too.
other than being careful and watching our backs...what else do you suggest?
by the way no one chooses to be harassed..u wud have to be a real masochist to invite it.
happy heart
drive safe cos someone is waiting for u at home
we have all been telling how it is for each one of us.everyones speaking from their experience...no ones talking off their heads.
but if anyone makes strong remarks...expect a retort ............
oryx...by naming and shaming over here on this forum how is it helping you?
i have stated this earlier...lets not use this forum to let go of our frustrations and annoyance..........you have a matter on hand to discuss...then discuss it as it is.
Stop turning sexual harrassment into a racist issue.
Fact: I have lived here 3 years... the majority of harrassment I have had is from Indians (not nepalis etc).
I am not being racist I am relying my experience. They choose to bother me I didn't choose to be harrassed... I am now naming and shaming...because it is deserved and it really annoys me.
Make excuses: the neighbourhood I live, not about not being able to bring wives...its just darn rude.
I refuse to say 'Asian' because I have never had any problems with other Asian nationalities like Phillipinos etc.
I am just telling it how it is for me.
hey terramax u have made some very strong remarks...sadly i dont agree with you.
i too am a south indian...and proud to be highly educated...........neither do i speak the kind of language suggested by your post.colour of my skin is debatable by north and south india.
happy heart
drive safe cos someone is waiting for u at home
they usually are safe b'fly....but incidents take place there too....the malls may be safer. its happened with me numerous times...........store attendants humming some suggestive songs.....they probably do it more with asians knowing we understand the language...they wont dare do with a local.and they do it on the sly...u cant verify it..and they will have a blank look on their face.
i have stopped walking in my neighbourhood...i am fine only with corniche.if i am walking in my area...i usually have my res numb clicked on the mobile ready to call the min something happens..thats how much i am worried about the place..its ok if u are 2 women walking...but single person u shud be careful...esp if u have a kid with you.if u are walking places walk along the main road where there is busy traffic.....some might honk to get your attention..but they wont try any stunts.
just think if someone tries to get close to you...u have a kid in the stroller...how fast can u escape the place...either pushing the stroller with the baby or carrying the baby.the incident maybe harmless....but it stays on your mind....and that is bad enough.we dont need to live in fear but we need to just be careful.
" asking about department stores....go to new world centre,lulu and such places.....if u are by yourself....someone is going to start singing some crazy suggestive song and they will always be staring at you and doing so......."
I found stores, supermarkets, malls, parks, Corniche etc to be absolutely safe, no problems at all there...Normally I get into unconfortable situations when I walk the streets, around my neighbourhood, or walking to places etc..
Terramax, with regard to the on-going debate of eve-teasing/sexual harrassment,I have a bone to pick with you. I think you're being very rude from the remarks you made; when you generalize people or races, i.e., Indian, Nepalis and Bangladeshis as being dark-skinned, in smelly clothes and speaking a guttural language.
I happen to be Indian and I take that as an insult. You also go on to say that you recognize only North Indians to be fair-skinned with European looks and educated professionals. I am from South India and I too happen to have a fair or light complexion. I am also educated and I don't think or feel superior to other Indians because of this. I am not smelly and I don't speak a guttural language. I
I suggest you go on a tour and travel the length and breadth of my great country. You'd end up being rather amazed or confused by the numerous languages, religions, cultures and cuisine you would encounter and in the South of India you would come across millions of dark-skinned people who are highly educated professionals.
However, I don't dispute the fact that there are incidents where men from the sub-continent are involved in harrassing women.
May I request you, in future, not to pass judgement on a race of people or generalize a situation the way you just did.
i agree with you hamlet...that if these men had their families here with them then it wud probably be a better scenario.........no one is condeming anyone or their origins.the whole discussion is of what is going on here and by whom.
we are not talking about USA either...at present we are all here in doha and this is going on in doha.....so what do we do about it here other than exercise caution and be careful.
esl teacher i agree the maids carry around a lot of baggage..but why do they get bitter...its bcos they are not treated like people...but like slaves here....who wont be bitter. we need food.shelter.clothes to cover and respect.if someone disrespects you or illtreats you...would u be nice.everyone deserves respect simple because we are all humans.all labour class people come here with hopes in mind to take care of someone back home...but they are here its a different story altogether.......no respect,weird working hours,no pay,female abuses in households,...who wont be bitter.we have read in the paper how easily maids are taken to court for stealing a can of nivea...how trivial can people get.
u asked why shud we leave our kids with strangers..some have to do it out of no choice....most dont earn good salaries....both husband n wife have to work...easiest wud be to have someone look after them at home.......its a big risk...but they choose to take it n are responsible for it.........they have weighed the pros and cons of maid vs nursery and they feel having a maid is more economical and advantageous.if u consider 300 for a child in a nursery..if u have 2-3 kids...its still a huge pinch for most parents who are shelling out 3/4th of the salary on house rents.
i am not trying to support or criticise anyone...but this is just another way of looking at it.
we have to be careful....we have to keep a watch on our kids...period.
May be if Asian men were paid enough to bring their wives, or to afford having girl friends as the case with dear "western men" they would have had the alleged "humility" their "western brothers" have....I am not justifying sexual harrasement, and I totally dispise it, but why dont we try to understand the motives behind it before condemning others and their origins
ahhh by the way, is it my imagination, or is it true that the USA has one of the highest women rape and abuse rates of the world
Han I don't mean they were convicted.
It's impossible that they would just come to Doha and start a life of crime.
I totally agree with you that parents are responsible for their own children...so why leave your child with a women who is a complete stranger..also in most cases these women are bitter and carry A LOT of baggage. As for the driver I just can't understand why someone would bring one of these men into their own homes...goodness it's bad enough they are on the street.
Really no one place in this world is "safe" we should always take care of ourselves and our children...never be too naive.
esl, i dont think if they are criminals they can enter doha so easily...maybe the indian political system....but not here as drivers.
moreover all maids are not shady characters......i know some real good ones who take very good care of their wards......end of the day parents are resposible too for the child's well being......child molestation is rampant here........we dont get to know of it. its only now that there is small section of crime beat in the papers else a few years ago everything was only by word of mouth.
why do you take offense to the truth...indian,nepali,bangladeshi,pakistani guys do act funny when a woman is around.its bcos they are away from family for years together and here too they are bundled up in camps with no exposure to anything outside work......i dont mind the staring...but the min they try to talk and approach even with the intention of talking...i get all defensive.
u are asking about department stores....go to new world centre,lulu and such places.....if u are by yourself....someone is going to start singing some crazy suggestive song and they will always be staring at you and doing so.......this is very common.they get a thrill out of it.i have gotten used to keep my ears all out open to hear out one wrong word to report them....most of the time its harmless...but given the chance they can get nasty.they wont do so if a male is around you.
butterfly........if u are accompanied by a kid.......the message they get is a total reverse...u are a much easy target......bcos they think u are defenseless with a kid....ur reaction time slows down bcos of the kid and its really scary bcos ur first instict is to get away for the sake of your kid and then yourself.......its so much more easy to come on to you. a few seconds is enough to traumatise anyone.
happy heart
drive safe cos someone is waiting for u at home
can you imagine some people bring these men into their homes as their drivers!! It's so sad there was a story of a little girl yesterday in the papers who was molested by her maid and driver for two years! I don't understand how someone can leave their child at home ALONE with one of these despicable men. And the maids...that's generally a shady area...
I agree with Terramax sure there are educated members of the sub-continent who are dignified and respectful to all people. But, gerenally the drivers along with the labourers are from the non-educated clan and in some cases were probably criminals in their home country before coming to Doha.
Angelo, who cares if they are Nepali Bangladeshi or Indians - to a western eye they all look and speak the same. In most of the cases it is even difficult to distinguish one person from another - they all are dark skinned, smelly in strange clothes and speaking gutural language.
I for myself can recognize only northern indians with fair skin and almost european look. But again, they are mostly educated professionals and are not of that ilk.
YOu are right, I should have reported my bad experience to the police and I would encourage anyone to do so. At the time I was just too relieved that I had got rid of him and both myself and my child were unhurt..
I guess being newish in the country, recovering from a cesarean and caring for my newborn kept me from dealing properly with the matter and going to the police.
My husband tried to find out who he was, called the housing agency and Kaharamaa but they didn't know...He simply talked to the watchman his way in !
As for races...I found that labourers stare a lot. These come from the subcontinent. However I've got used to staring and I don't even notice it anymore... It's fine with me now, being stared at doesn't hurt!. I found arabs and north-africans to be the most annoying in terms of following, pestering etc...Maybe cos I look like arab race myself, I don't know, but the amusing thing is that I always walk with my child which should send the signal of "not available".
sure men of all races will look at a pretty woman but the difference is, westerners generally have enough humility to look away and get back to their own business if you stare back or furrow your brow at them.
My experience here has been that the most uncomfortable places are the ones where the manual workers frequent, yes I think they are mostly Indian, Pakistani and Bangladeshi. They stare and stare, as a group, and just keep staring and smirking! I even bought an abayya to wear to the local supermarket because i couldnt put up with it anymore.
In the abayya, the arabs give me looks like "i want to marry you" which is quite amusing (given my brown eyes dont give away my race) and much easier to cope with than the predatory "you're a juicy piece of meat" looks i am subjected to in western clothes.
Are you guys sure most of the "eve teasing" comes from Asian (as in Indian) men or are we unable to distinguish between Nepali, Bangladeshi, Pakistani, Indian men.
Being an Indian, I kind of take offence to the remarks that generalises Indian men with "eve teasing". I personally have not heard guys whistling at women (whether Indian, european, western etc), staring ---- sometimes yes, but it applies to all categories of men (whether Indian, European, Western etc).
Am curious where this happens in Qatar? At any of the Hyper Markets there is a lot of security personnel so the victim can report the crime.
Please do not hang me for my comments, I am trying to understand.
Tough one..... Lets put it like this I am a person, not a color or a race just a person. I point blank refuse to be catergorised regardless of the color of my skin, my birth right or my gender. I do not and refuse to understand the Persicutions suffored by "Afro Amercian's in "Y2k+" based on the fact that MANY lost their lives in the past for these people to have the freedom that they have today, and those that CHOOSE to go through life with the chip on their shoulder deserve everything that they get.....
REF the situation in Qatar with harrasment - As a female, I have suffered this ALOT, it does not matter if I am dressed up or down, on my way back from the gym, looking like %$#@ looking fíng fabulous or with my husband, it does not matter... there they are in all their splender ready to give you/me their best shot. I used to get upset when my Husband would shout or threaten them, I would say, dont be cruel they dont know any better... but I am wrong, they do know better and they choose not too. I mean even when I am with my husband they try it on and am sure they are not too fussed when my husband tells them OFF, they just see that as a sign to come back and try later maybe when he is not there. My attitude has changed, I now recognise that attitude allowed them to think that staring, following, calling, touching etc was ok and it is NOT.
After my last encounter with a TCN let's just say that I do not think that individual will EVER try anything with anyone EVER...... (evil Laugh)
Princess
tyler, haven't understood your English,but got a hint that probably you being the decent guy have tried to reign in the soldiers responsible for Abu Ghareb or the recruit recently convicted for raping a 16 year old Iraqi girl.
Truth, if I read Ahmad correctly he has tried to explain what sexual harrasment is and what I said above is - before anyone jumps to insinuate people on the basic of race/nationality expect to be judged by GW Bush standards (Who, you would probably agree does not represent the western liberal world)
Sticking to the subject, I agree with you that Doha is not so safe as it is made out to be and usually the perverts get away. Can't see the implemention of your recommendation of castration though attempted any time soon! I would agree with butterfly that if you hold your ground and warn of police reporting, the perverts usually back off.
My wife was taking english lessons in Berlitz, and there was a chinese girl, who was in her group. One week before the end of the course, this girl disappeared after going to Corniche for a walk. Her aunt came to the courses crying and was asking everybody - may be someone knows something. Her passport, ID all was left at home. She was reported missing to the police and as far as I know never found.
truth321 stated "As quite rightly pointed out they tend to be the worst at sexually harrasing women, western/white women are not there for you amusement or sexual gratification regardless of who you think you are!"
i would say no woman is for anyone's amusement or sexual gratification.
this discussion is not racial in anyway...i bieng an indian know how my country men behave here and am not proud of it at all....... but its the truth..lets not hide behind colourful words ...lets talk about whats happening here in doha.
if a woman wishes to walk along a road by herself she should have freedom to do so without fear that some guy will honk onto her to get her attention or whistle at her or make any kind of gesture towards her.very sadly you dont have that freedom here...unfortuntately some of us do meet with unplesant situations.
butterfly i am surprised you kept quite about the incident...he shud have been arrested...........bcos i am quite sure he is trying to get his fix someplace else.......
and its not women who are prey...kids are easy targets in this place too.
doha is a safe place by most standards....but that does not mean we leave behind caution....you need to watch your step. society has all kinds of people to carry out the balancing act...we need to watch ourselves............
happy heart
drive safe cos someone is waiting for u at home
Butterfly What?!?!
You didn't call the police immediately...think of what this freak can do to someone else?
Who was this guy and how did he know where you lived??
Was it just some random fool that followed you all the way to your appartment?
or was he knocking on doors trying his luck??
Poor Butterfly sorry you had to experience such a terrifying situation :(
Sexual harrasment as in driving up to her trying to stop her making very rude and suggestive remarks, trying to get phone numbers, pestering her, following her home, trying to ram her off the road whilst she is driving...you know normal day in Doha.
Well guys unfortunatly in a country that is very conservative you dont get much in-betweens, you either get people who are very well mannered and nice, or people who should be locked up in the cell next to Hannibal from silence of the lambs!
Sadly there are crimes that take place some of them so twisted in nature that even extremely twisted porn companies have turned down the idea of imitating what happened in any way! And the newspaper does write about them, the arabic newspaper decided sometime this year to go all out and write them and it was disgusting to realize some of the things i read could actually be done! But people did not get away with it, the least sentences were 25 years to life in prison! Yes castration should have been a plus but they didnt go for that. There are some qatari's who do commit horrible crimes, but they dont represent everyone and they dont get away with it!
I dont know what you mean by sexual harrasement man, maybe a facial gesture or a stare or sayign something then i can see that happening if your wife is hot, i see it happening in any country actually not just qatar. But if they are in anyway touching her or coming near her with the intent to touch her in anyway then yes we need to put a stop to that and the law will stand with u.
However you mention take their license plate number so are these guys just cutting her off on the road? or driving by her and staring? I dont get what you mean by they are sexually harrasing her? However if someone does have the nerve to touch her you give me a call because maiming disrespectful qatari's happens to be a favourite hobby of mine. Sexually harassing someone is difficult when the guy is ina wheelchair with a neckbrace on, trying to flirt with a stephen hawkings voice isnt exactly gonna work either for them!
Ladies gents and associated animals, this is not about racism. We all know it exists and the less said about the vile subject the better.
This is about sexual harrasment in Qatar, I was not generalising nor stereotyping, yes the majority of sexual harrassment cases come from Asian men (all you have to do is watch in shopping centres and you will see what Im on about).
All men be it white, black, asian or even green are capable of sexual harrasment and in some cases even women (shock horror on that one).
In short DROP THE RACISM RUBBISH, DROP THE ATROCITIES SPEACHES (to many of them to list and not that we can anything about them regardless of who did it and for what reason)
tg, you blatantly have no grasp at what I was referring to, I said all Arab men, but then after the comments that have been brought up maybe I should have included Asian men!
As quite rightly pointed out they tend to be the worst at sexually harrasing women, western/white women are not there for you amusement or sexual gratification regardless of who you think you are!
Tyler, well said!!!
No idea where the hell G/Bay and the rest of that twoddle came from that tg was spouting, talk about missing the subject completely!!!!
Whats wrong Tyler too many white boys from the suburbs living the Thug Life now :-) or acting black. We shoo do hate we have messed up so many yall fine upstanding white youth with our Rap Music. The problem is usually not the people in the community however people outside who are making money off of the community and the stereotypes. I guess kind of like that only white guys are homosexual( oooppps PC went out the window)
Unfortunatelly TG everyone who has approached my wife has been Indian not to say others won't also. In truth to what TG is saying to a certain point is true. So Tyler are you ready to clean up our act since we are from America and it is "our community" not a black, white, brown or blue community.
Act your age not your shoe size
Just because the broken car is black and someone says so does not mean that all black cars are broken. Too bad for some nationalities that the LARGE majority of hem each of us comes in contact with give the rest a bad name. Lets for example look at (about to not be PC) the blacks in america... as a whole just individuals gtting through life...however due to the decisions a few have made the rest of the world is trying to live "Thug Life". Is this racist...or is it learned from the perception of YOUR actions? The well mannered well behaved individuals of any culture or society should rein in their compatriots before they CRY about racism. Fix your problems since you see them just as clearly as us, yet you hide behind excuses and facades to avoid admitting that there are some seriously screwed about opinions about any culture or group tht have been derived from the very actions of that group. Prejudice is learned from lack of ignorance in such a diverse world.
Its surprizing how people are willing to jump to racist insiniuations based on a few or single incidents. Despite your coloured views thanks for saying the line Oryx: "I think a society shows its true colours by how it treats its weakest members". Now I would apply this argument and try to remember how the Americans treated prisoners at Abu Ghareb or how many innocent people are held without trial at GBay and use it to judge americans. Or I would try to recall how South Africans treated their blacks and judge their society on it. Shall I also try to judge how the Japanese treated Chinese and Philipinos during world war II (performing experiments on living prisioners) to judge them?? The less said about the silence of the western world to Palestinian plight, the better.
Will it also apply to Qatar,or GCC in general, the way it treats its poor Labourers and maids?? (Read Human Rights watch for its glittering tribute to Dubai). I guess before making general insinuation based on individual experiences a bit of introspection will help. Its always about individuals, good or bad, not nationalities. Just as its a bit rich on "truth" to come with the line "all arabs who are reading this".
are u from india oryx.
i will tell u what we do back home.in india the transport service is used by all young,old,working etc...like it is everywhere else too...except maybe qatar.eveteasing is ver common in india.
we usually carry open safetypins in our hands.the buses get very very crowded and u will have some happy guy pushing his "u know what" against you....its not unheard of women pushing their safety pins against their "u know what".i used to have a bunch of pins with me.
also its very common to have some commotion in buses back home.women very happily slap the perverts and once it starts then its usually god have mercy on that guy...bcos either all the women get together and beat teh crap out of the fellow or the other male folk of the bus will do so....usually the bus attendants called conductors intervene and throw the pervert out of the bus.
we usually have perverts trying to travel by the bus that takes the school routes just to take a peek at the girls.
safety pin will be more painful than a fork and easier to carry.
just dont walk in any dark alleys or dimlit areas.
its not ignorance or disrespect...its just taking a chance n trying to get away with it bcos they r desperate for anykind of contact with the female kind.
happy heart
drive safe cos someone is waiting for u at home
I wouldn't call Indian men 'hormone crazy' I just call it damm right ignorance and disrespect. The behaviour patterns can be like pack animals - its bestial.
There are good and bad folk everywhere but actually I have found as long as I am pretty firm with boundaries and behave decouriously Arab men are fine and many very courteous. Unfortunately I have only seen minimal charm and grace from Indian males and find them uncompassionate and agressive.
I think a society shows its true colours by how it treats its weakest members. As a female I am preceived (ha ha!) as this...so it is an inditement on the perpertrator's thinking.
Tip: If you live in a dimly lit area Carry a fork in your pocket... it isn't seen as a dangerous weapon but if worse came to worse I am sure if a guy had one stuck in his goolies it would be rather painful. (Then call me so I can come and laugh)
I wouldn't call Indian men 'hormone crazy' I just call it damm right ignorance and disrespect. The behaviour patterns can be like pack animals - its bestial.
There are good and bad folk everywhere but actually I have found as long as I am pretty firm with boundaries and behave decouriously Arab men are fine and many very courteous. Unfortunately I have only seen minimal charm and grace from Indian males and find them uncompassionate and agressive.
I think a society shows its true colours by how it treats its weakest members. As a female I am preceived (ha ha!) as this...so it is an inditement on the perpertrator's thinking.
Tip: If you live in a dimly lit area Carry a fork in your pocket... it isn't seen as a dangerous weapon but if worse came to worse I am sure if a guy had one stuck in his goolies it would be rather painful. (Then call me so I can come and laugh)
dear all...having lived here all my life alhamdullilah.. the first lesson my parents told me was
DO NOT OPEN THE DOOR TO ANYONE.NEVER LET ANYONE IN.
i still dont..even if its a known person come to work in the house unless my dad or my husband informs me prior..
i WILL NOT open the door.. they can get lost and come again when the men in the house are available.
sadly i have to agree most of the teasing comes from hormone crazy indians.i went walking around my house area just twice...it also faces the road so its a real busy area...not at all isolated...and the third day of walking i had idiots whistling at me from inside the cooperative society...and i am fully dressed with headscarf.the minute i would get out for my walk one idiot from the villa would get on his cycle and follow me on the main road.....again an indian.
my friend living near muntaza health centre...another busy area had a van come towards her and invite her inside 3 times.she had her kid in the stroller with her. at first she thought he was an arab then up close he was another pervert indian.
anyones fair game to these perverts.
ITS NOT ARABS U NEED TO BE WORRIED ABOUT BUT MOSTLY THE HORMONE CRAZY STARVING ASIANS HERE.
its much much better now.earlier u would not be able to enter the souqs because the pathans were famous for pinching your bottoms.
my elderly neighbour had a arab guy follow her till the house bcos she wud go out at a particular time everyday in the morning and come back walking..and she would dress nice. she didnt enter her house but came into our house out of fear...the man waited a full 15mins before he left....we all waited n watched with out hearts thudding till he left.whom do we call....unless u can speak in arabic and fight like crazy...no point calling anyone.my first insticnt would be to thrash the person up but when the police arrive u shud be able to defend yourself...else the one speaking arabic can just get away.
for stay at home ladies NEVER FOLLOW A PATTERN OF ACTIONS..SOMEONES ALWAYS WATCHING YOU. I FOLLOW THIS STRICTLY.
Yep I agree with the Indian bit totally, many have come very close to seeing my fist up close and very painfully.
However in this case, it was definitly an Arab!! No matter what race or religion there will always be the idiots that think they can take advantage, women need self defence classes in this country either that or they need to arm themselves!!!
Guys/girls, Im not pointing the finger at any individual culture/race/religion etc etc.
My wife is very capable of looking after herself and has had this quite a few times, trust me the obligatory no go away (although not in such a nice manner) does NOT work with these people.
I can only sympathise with your ordeal butterfly!!!
I agree with the name and shame principle totally, if the expat community actually stood together on these issues and raised a voice loud enough then things may change.
yes please learn the difference between Qataris or other Arabs and Indians or such. I have found most Arab men are not that forward. They have more manners than that. I however have seen more than one instance with Indians or others who have been too forward. Again not to say a Qatari or Arab is not capable of doing this but it is not common.
Butterfly wrote:
II told him my husband was about to arrive any minute and he would kill him. That was after he put his hands in my legs. He left without saying a word.
Butterfly: You and Your husband let this A@sho$le get away with this one? I would not, even it cost me to leave this place. I would not care for the consequences.
Respectfully
David
yup it was scary. My daughter was only two weeks at the time. I called my watchman and he came upstairs and told me it was ok cos it was from the water company or something, so I let him in.
I told him my husband was about to arrive any minute and he would kill him. That was after he put his hands in my legs. He left without saying a word.
are you serious some man went and knocked on your door? How did you get rid of him??
wow...frightening...
I seriously don't think Qatar is as safe as it is made out to be.
Having lived here for 3 years - everytime I walk out of my house (ie not drive) I really really dress down. However are you sure all these men are Arab??? I have found the vast majority of harrassment comes from Indians. They have an awful term in India called 'eve teasing' which trivialises and virtually justifies overt sexual harrassment.
If I am not locked 24/7 in the house... then I am fair game attitude.
Practice zero tolerance - silence means its ok.... tell them to get lost loudly and firmly.
Many roads are badly lit and these guys know they have virtual immunity.
Its disgusting - and if we could report properly.. get photos in the paper and then deportation then the problem would soon decrease.
You have opened here, Truth...
I have learnt the following lessons:
1- NEVER open the door. I did once, after phoning my building's watchman to ensure that the man standing outside my door was REALLY coming from the water company to check something with the water pipes. Well, my husband got the watchman sacked afterwards, but I never bothered to report that man to the police.
2- If your wife is being stared at, never stare back. Even if she returns an evil stare. Many men will wrongly assume that she's looking for it.
3- If she is being followed, harrassed etc, is best not to look shy or scared. I found that telling the offender that you will report him to the police normally works and they give up.
Other than that, I might add that when I first came and had few unluckly encounters, I assumed that all arab men were like that and that's wrong.